Real Housewives of New Jersey

Melissa Gorga opens Envy

Last night’s episode of Real Housewives Of New Jersey featured the opening of Melissa Gorga‘s long-awaited Posche revenge, Envy. A boutique dedicated to the many-splendored stylings of Melissa’s own taste. Teresa Giudice also proved that her and Juicy’s love is as real as the prison cell that holds them!

Poison Gorga seems to be confused both about which century he’s living in and that his life is not a 1980’s movie starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. You guys, men with sprayed on muscles DO NOT take care of their own children – they are not babysitters! 

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Jacqueline and Chris

In all honesty, it’s still a little unclear to me if Jacqueline Laurita left Real Housewives of New Jersey or if she was fired. I have no idea why she would ever leave that show, so I’m going to go with the latter. Nevertheless, it is very obvious why she is back.

Jacqueline and Chris Laurita have explained that they are going through financial troubles during the first few episodes of this season. They even agreed not to give each other Christmas gifts to be fiscally responsible and Chris said that he sold some of their jewelry for money. So this makes me wonder what is going on with the Laurita business ventures.

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dolores-catania

Tonight on Watch What Happens Live, Andy was joined by Real Housewives of New Jersey newbie Dolores Catania and Shahs of Sunsets Reza Farahan. Dolores was quizzed on how much Teresa Giudice has changed since prison and more, while Reza sniped at Golnesa again.

Andy starts off by asking Reza why the cast (aside from Asa) didn’t stick up for MJ with Vida after the engagement? “Culturally, that’s just not what you do.” Andy then asks him if it was a smart move to buy a Palm Springs investment property without seeing it? “Yeah, it was. Just because of what it’s worth now.”

Teresa is receptive to Jacqueline's drop-by

I’m all for kumbaya and all that jazz, but I just feel so awkward watching Jacqueline Laurita go back and forth between talking shit about Teresa Giudice and trying to get sympathy talking about how she misses her. It is so blatantly obvious that Jacqueline wants Teresa to like her. It even seems like she’s more upset about not being Teresa’s BFF than whatever offense she alleges bothers her from years ago.

Her desperation is way too real. Plus, we all know how badly she needs to be on this show and it’s obviously way better to be a part of Real Housewives of New Jersey if you are in Teresa’s good graces. So I am not at all surprised that she put her pride aside and came crawling back to Teresa, but I am honestly a little shocked that she just showed up instead of scheduling a standard RHONJ-style sit down to be more dramatic. But then again, Teresa was on house arrest, so I guess she couldn’t exactly pull that move. At the very least, she could have called ahead of time.

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Albie-Manzo-Abs

If you’re not following Albie Manzo on Instagram, you really should be. Caroline Manzo’s oldest son has been working out and he looks good. Shout out to Bravo’s The Daily Dish for pointing this out because I ended up finding a lot of great things on his Instagram account.

And if you’re not an Instagram person, there’s other good news if you’re a fan of Albie’s and the rest of the Manzo family. Their Real Housewives of New Jersey spin off series, Manzo’d With Children will be back on TV very soon.

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Siggy Flicker

I am beyond elated that Real Housewives of New Jersey is (finally) back because I am dying to see how things are going between the OG cast members that I have become invested in. With that said, I’m wondering how the new girls are going to fit in.

When Siggy Flicker first appeared with her head all wrapped up in bandages after getting a face lift, I was cracking up and instantly loved her. Since then, I don’t have too much of an opinion because I can’t tell if I’m seeing the real Siggy or not. I’m so over referring to herself in third person as “the Sig” and I can’t tell if she’s trying too hard or if that’s just how she is. What kind of role will she have on the show?

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Jacqueline Laurita, Siggy Flicker, Dolores Catania

All feels right in the world now that Real Housewives of New Jersey is back on TV. The queen (Teresa Giudice) is  back and the rest of the cast is pretty on point as well. The nice thing about New Jersey is that these ladies actually have history and ties outside of being cast on the same reality TV show. It is the only show in the franchise where the casting doesn’t seem forced

With that said, the beef and friendships really run deep in this group. So I really live for it when the ladies speak out about the show and each other. Jacqueline Laurita and the new girls Dolores Catania and Siggy Flicker all came together for an interview – and yes they talked about Teresa, obviously.

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Real Housewives of New Jersey recap

Last night on Real Housewives Of New Jersey, we learned that a leopard doesn’t change its spots, even if said leopard changes the way she wears them. Jacqueline Laurita groveled extended the olive branch to see if Teresa Giudice was sincere about washing their hands of bad blood and rebuilding their friendship

Teresa is out of prison, and from this point forward everything must go in a new direction. Say “new direction” fast and it sounds like “nude erection,” which encompassed about 3/4 of the things Teresa learned from “camp.” The other thing was not to be slutty with your your John Hancock. So, yeah, about those leopards and their spots… 

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