Despite what anyone wants to say about Teresa Giudice, the infamous bankrupt villainess of questionable intelligence has managed to convince producers to entirely craft the storylines of Real Housewives of New Jersey around her. Genius or lucky?
In tonight's installment of Teresa's Revenge, she will go head-to-head with cousin Rosie Pierri, who was last seen in a drunken stupor instructing Teresa to participate in some lurid sexual practices. Hey – hate sex works for some people!
Anyhoodle, Rosie and Teresa will sit down tonight and try to iron out all the conflict that has erupted since their parents stopped speaking and Wallpaper Wakile joined the show as Melissa Gorga's sidekick.
Both Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga get on my last nerve with their one-upping and back-and-forth and white lies on Real Housewives of New Jersey. Petty, petty, petty! However, I don't know what is more humorous…Tre's very thinly veiled insults or Melissa's constant high road antics as if she's never stooped to her sister-in-law's level.
After Tre revisited her table trash can flipping ways at "her" gym with brother Poison on this week's episode, Melissa is all about addressing the situation in her weekly Bravo blog. Don't worry…she also takes plenty of opportunity to promote her book Love Italian Style!
Melissa writes, "What I saw from my husband’s conversation with his sister is that Teresa can dish it out, but she can’t take it. Come on girl, toughen up! I take it all the time. On Season 3, she mocked my music and called me a gold digger. On Season 4, she said I’d leave my husband for a richer man and I was questioned by her about being a stripper. We already know I’m a bad daughter-in-law. I don’t know how many more negative things I can be accused of."
So, Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giudice allegedly make amends this season and start patching their family back together. But for now things are still a hot mess of allegations, crazy, and back-and-forth nonsense.
Next week Joe Gorga will apparently start to recognize that his wife is also instigating the family feud as he catches wind of an explosive tweet she sends. Our source shares with us EXCLUSIVELY that Joe is caught in the middle and has no idea who to believe in all the arguing.
All three shows saw an increase in viewers this week after suffering some downward trends each week since their premieres on June 2nd. RHONJ was back up to 2.41 million viewers tuning in and Princesses Long Island bumped up to 925,000 after hitting just 780,000 last week. Keeping Up with the Kardashians only ticked up a bit, from 2.1 to 2.2 million.
Below we have the breakdown of each week since their premieres.
Last night on Real Housewives of New Jersey it was another round of tit-for-tat over the most mundane crap imaginable. I mean, maybe it's not mundane if it's your family, but after 2.5 seasons of the storyline that never ends, I think we're all a bit tired of the Gorgadice family feud. If the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results, I think we can all officially declare the Gorgadices "insane". Right, Dr. Jacqueline Laurita, wino-behavioral specialist!
Things begin – oh who really cares where they begin because this show is like a loop everything ends and begins in the same exact spot so that you never know which episode is which and what exactly happened. Let's start with Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga rehashing birthday party-gate to their respective spouses while their kids all listen nearby.
Melissa is flipping some pancakes and Poison is deciding if they'll liquefy in his intestines so we all have to hear about his explosive diarrhea again, then she tells him something else vomit-inducing; that Teresa and Kim D (Teresa's soldier in the hideous hair extension army) like attacked her at Gia's party. And it was like sooooo terrible, and now she has to go into witness protection, and she did so visit her FIL in the hospital for like hours and hours and hours except she was in the lobby on twitter and reading magazines so he didn't actually see her. Meanwhile Antonia's just hanging out in the background.
The first question is asking what the deal is with her and Dina. Caroline shares that she's sick of answering that question over and over, but she shares "everything is the same. We say hello but we're not friends. "
Then came the inevitable question of what makes Caroline think she can fix anyone else's family (the Gorgadices) since her own family is 'broken' right now. Caroline says, "bottom line is, I can recognize when something's wrong, as I recognize when something's wrong in my own family. It doesn't mean I haven't tried, it doesn't mean that we haven't been talking or trying to work things out. It's living, breathing and dealing with it, so you can recognize it in somebody else's family and try to help. That's it."