Oh Real Housewives of Orange County – it’s almost time for us to part ways, but not before some magnificent drama. Oh, yes last night’s episode. Oh it was a silly bit of fun. Princess Thespian of All Times Heather Dubrow had a re-naming party which is not at all like a wedding, except it took the same precedence as a wedding in her mind.
And because it was the all-important end of the season cast party when Bravo makes everyone put on their mankiest fur coats and truck out to some godforsaken themed event, everyone was there. Like even the ones that aren’t really there, if you catch my drift.
But before we get to that little shin-dig, we have to wade through the rest of this episode. Things start out with Tamra Barney meeting Heather andGretchen Rossi for drinks cause she has a very special announcement. Tammie Sue is gettin’ married for the very third time.
Oh, Tammie – I love your optimism. This ones really gonna work isn’t it? This is like a Lifetime movie. Did I mention that I am totally obsessed in a big huge way with Lifetime – cause I am. And before you ask – yes, I watched Blue Lagoon.
Bravo is really stepping up its game in regard to the Real Housewives of Atlanta, and I couldn’t be more thrilled. Straight From the A is confirming that the girl we all loved seeing grow up under the watchful eye of Cliff and Claire Huxtable is joining the cast. That’s right! Rudy HuxtableKeisha Knight Pulliam is going to be hanging with the Neenster and Krazy Kim! I have no words…it’s just so exciting! Granted, she’s not a housewife, but seriously, when has that ever been criteria to be on a housewives’ show?
Of course, while Keisha is known around the globe as lovable Rudy, she’s quite the accomplished business woman and philanthropist. She graduated from Spellman College in Atlanta and also founded Kamp Kizzy which is a summer day camp for tween and teen girls to boost their self-esteem. One may question if she’ll be tarnishing her impeccable reputation by joining a reality show (especially THIS reality show!), but I beg to differ. The stunning Keisha will do nothing but class up this franchise…mark my words!
After a tumultuous but victorious competition in Chicago, Abby Lee’s dancers are back for more. Last night’s Dance Moms proved to be even more explosive, with Abby and Kelly once again butting heads. As much as she wanted to leave the studio, Kelly wants her daughters to get to enjoy dancing with her friends, so she has returned fully prepared to see her daughters on the bottom of the pyramid.
Kelly called it. Both Brooke and Paige are at the bottom of the pyramid. Not only will they not get solos, they have the word “probation” splashed across their head shots. Brooke thinks it’s unfair that she and her sister are being punished for an argument that their mother had with Abby. Chloe is also at the bottom for missing a rehearsal due to a doctor’s appointment. Christi is livid. MacKenzie is on the middle tier, with Abby citing she needs more ballet training. Nia joins her, and Abby praises her trio. Holly knows how excited this makes her daughter, so she is very proud. Maddie is once again back on top.
Thankfully, Teen Mom wasn’t nearly as depressing this week. Last week’s premiere of Teen Mom was a train wreck. This week, instead of weeping like a fool, I sat completely dumbfounded. These girls have come so far yet have gone nowhere. How is that possible? I spent the bulk of the hour resisting the urge to bang my own head against a wall.
At least the super adorable and maturing (someone has to, right?) toddlers bring a new aspect to the show. Too bad we can’t just watch them and skip their parents. Let’s pitch ‘Dr. Drew’s Daycare’ to MTV.
Because no one at Bravo will give these ladies a muzzle or render their typing finger useless, the former BFFs are outing each other’s secrets in the most nasty, vitriolic feud ever. Celebrity Deathmatch, indeed!
Following Sunday night’s explosive episode, Teresa and Jacqueline have both written novellas in the form of Bravo blogs. Imagine if they put their creative juices and minimal brain power towards good instead of evil?
In her NINE PAGE tome, Teresa address all the elements from Sunday’s explosive fight, which apparently lasted over five hours. Thank goodness we didn’t have to review the unedited footage!
With the Real Housewives of Orange County drawing to a close, there has been a lot of speculation about what is in the works for Alexis Bellino. Not always portrayed as the sharpest tool in the shed, Alexis has lost good friends and gained unusual allies this season.
Alexis was recently interviewed by WetPaint.com about how she was portrayed and whether she’s mended any of her relationships with her cast mates. Highlights from that interview follow.
Once upon a time there was a woman named Pinot Singer who thought she knew a lot about everything and thought no one could see through her. Pinot believed her life was like one of those double-sided mirrors where from one side it looked like a window and from the other side it looked like a mirror. She assumed she could clearly see people and they could see only goodness through her eyes.
Pinot believed she reflected goodness, honesty, truthfulness, and pleasant goodwill. Pinot was wrong. Pinot is delusional, but delusion is a powerful drug – more powerful than pinot grigio, that’s for sure!
Last night on Real Housewives of New Yorkthe ladies assembled for a mid-day brunch, everyone but Pinot and LuAnn de Lesseps. Thank goodness. I’m not sure what time it was, but there they all were; this gaggle of desperate famewhores (and Carole Radziwill) all dressed up as if they were going to a nightclub when it was 1 in the afternoon, outside, in a dowtown restaurant.