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Somebody's got a birthday right around the corner!  That's right!  Kim Kardashian has a lot of things to celebrate as she enters into her 33rd year. A tiny tot and a tiny rapper, to name two!

You know what could pay for a massive, opulent party?  If she auctioned off her engagement ring from Kris Humphries!  Wait, what? She gave it back and KRIS auctioned it off? And someone paid WHAT for it?

It's a lot to take in, y'all, but yes, someone paid an obscene amount to Kim's sloppy seconds finger candy.  She can't be bothered by it though because she's got a birthday bonanza to attend!

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Film Premiere of 'Iron Man 3'

Photo Credit: FayesVision/WENN.com

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This week on Teen Mom 3,  Briana DeJesus visits the GYN for birth control, and Alex Sekella screams at her family.  Also, Katie Yeager endures the birthday trip from hell,  and Mackenzie Douthit discovers that Josh McKee has been lying to her about rodeo practice. 

Briana kicks off this week's episode, and she's very happy to report that her sister/nanny is over last week's "spread my wings and fly far away" attitude. Also, Briana took about three minutes of college classes, so she takes a much needed break. When a boy calls Brittany on her phone, Briana lectures her on birth control and pouts about her little mistake, also known as Nova Star

Next Alex studies while Arabella sits unassisted on the very edge of a table. Are they training her for the circus? Seriously. Since Arabella nailed the death defying high table sitting act, Alex tries a chair. Without a net. This poor baby tumbles off the chair and falls face first onto the hardwood floor. Alex complains because she can't take her eyes off of Arabella for even a second. 

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Miami Vice house no more! Joanna Krupa is turning to be something of a real estate scion! Who knew the supermodel had such a brain for investments! First we caught a glimpse of her gorgeous LA home and now she's splashed out for a new Miami condo. 

And lucky for her the dated water-front home Joanna and Romain Zago have been living in on Real Housewives of Miami is a thing of the past! GossipCop reveals that the model and her hubby paid $1.4 million for a fabulous Miami condo in one of the swankiest buildings in the city. 

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Real Housewives of New Jersey is OV-AH! And with promises of "adjustments" and rumors of cast firings (and one cast member officially quitting), we're all excited about what the future brings

Teresa Giudice closed season 5 with a bang – big, ol' superficial bang! Unfortunately Teresa points out that the pesky editing devil was up to his old tricks again and the fight we saw her having with Caroline Manzo seconds before the show ended, actually happened much, much earlier in the day. 

Calling her missive "I'm Stumped!" (copying Melissa Gorga, I see), Teresa doesn't bother with the red-tape of her bosses over at Bravo and as she usually does when she wants to point out how they've been wrong she resorts to using her own site. Let's see what Ms. Teresa has to say from her very own Fabulicious website

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Preachers of L.A. is hoping to be considered a positive reality show that is more about substance and message than about bickering, drama, and flash.

Breakout star Deitrick Haddon, a gospel singer and inspiring preacher, says he was more than aware of the negative connotations association with reality TV but felt he could overcome that obstacle to tell an inspiring story. "You can't live your life according to what has been or what has passed. It's up to you to redefine the situation," he explains to Essence. "I definitely knew there was a negative history on reality shows. But I knew that this show would kind of change the game because it's about preachers. Preachers are people who have a certain standard about themselves and they are people of integrity." 

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Kanye West Kim Kardashian Paris

Kim Kardashian's weight has been big news lately. First when the Keeping Up With The Kardashians star was pregnant people were talking about how much she gained and now that daughter North is four months old they're talking about how much she's lost. 

Kim recently confessed she's been using the Atkins diet to lose weight. The former uber trend in weightloss advocates little to no "carbs" and instead is protein-based. "I've actually been doing the Atkins diet & luv it," Kim shared on twitter.

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Last night on Real Housewives of Miami we were witness to the slooooowest wedding ever. I mean it took over five years and then some hours to finally get that thing officially off the ground, right?! 

Adriana de Moura was hours upon hours late to her own affair because she confused wedding with fashion show and was holed up in a suite getting dressed. Meanwhile downstairs the guests were sweating to death before passing out from hunger and finally giving up and leaving. Hopefully they all swung by McDonald's on their way out. 

Twenty-four hours before the big day, the drama begins. Adriana is having a stress attack and is so sick she's talking about skipping the whole thing to sleep. She pretty much did skip the whole thing but that's cause she was grooming. Speaking of grooming, despite just getting an IV of vitamins she needs Frederic Marq to give her a B-12 shot in the butt for more vitamins. Is it possible to be addicted to them?

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