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As the Jersey Shore's end draws near, one of its former cast members is making a last-ditch effort to remain relevant.  Jersey quitter Angelina Pivarnick is desperately looking for a high profile attorney to help her sue MTV. 

A source tells TMZ that Angelina is fuming over the way MTV edits her appearances on the show.  She feels that they are making her look bad on purpose and that MTV humiliated her by rejecting her request to help with the Restore the Shore special. 

Angelina reached out to Gloria Allred, attorney to the f-listers who normally leaps at the chance to rep famous clients and hold press conferences. (But doesn't seem to ever do much in court?)  Gloria shot down Angelina's request for representation, saying  Angelina's not famous enough and she doesn't do charity work she's just too busy at the moment. 

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Oh, Sister Wives!  Thank you so much for introducing me to the Dargers.  TLC, what do you say about a Darger spin-off?  Kody Brown would be livid!

We started last night with Kody going over plans for each of the four homes.  How are these people affording these homes?  The wives, except Janelle, are all getting totally greedy with their need for extra bedrooms and wet bars and offices.  I am predicting this season doesn't end well for the Browns.

After squaring away the blueprints, the family can look forward to their family vacation with some polygamist friends…because that's normal!  The Dargers aren't the same faith as the Browns.  Instead they are "independent polygamists" which must be some kind of code for dude who wanted to marry more than one lady.  Joe Darger married two women, Alina and Vicki, on the same day, one of whom looked to be about fourteen at the time, and then ten years later married Val who is Vicki's twin sister.  Talk about sharing everything!  I'm more than a tad skeezed out because not only will they actually be SISTER wives, the kids will be sibling-cousin hybrids…and among the three of them, there are twenty-three children.  The double marriage was arranged by Joe's mom.  Lovely.

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So last night Real Housewives of Atlanta was filled with Wig People Problems. Oh, wigs were disappearing and telling tall tales and making excuses and dealing with dog poop and storming out and doing some math wrong and disappearing. There were wignanigans all over the place.

And luckily NeNe Leakes was on hand to provide riotous commentary on every last wigantic. And she finally got to use her Wig Be Gone (sold separately, includes S&H) – and poof! Kim Zolciak, her wig collection, and her stories that change as often as said wigs fled in the wake of a Housewives revolt. And we bid her adieu. Will we miss her? Sure. I mean, she is a snark lovers dream!

Other things happened last night, Kenya Moore's crazy got even MORE crazy as she turned her attentions towards another lady's man. Cynthia Bailey tried to pretend that going on vacation with all the ladies of the RHOA was her dream come true. Yeah, but instead of speaker phone invites (the classic!) we got sit down personalized invites. 

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I feel like there is a giant math equation regarding how much gossip we hear about the show in proportion to the ratio of time a housewives franchise has been on the air divided by the amount of certified crazies in the cast and then taken to the third power of the square root of how many on-air divorces occur multiplied by the number of husbands we think could potentially be cheating.  It's like E=MC² up in here!

Given all of those mathematical conundrums, it only makes sense we'd be hearing a lot the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills at the moment.  We've got the crazies, we've got the divorces, and I have some suspicions about some of those husbands!  First up, we've got Brandi Glanville engaging in yet another Twitter war with home wrecker (don't sue me!) LeAnn Rimes and more news on the Adrienne Maloof front.

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Photo by FayesVision/Wenn.com

 

Two weeks ago on Big Rich Texas, Leslie Birkland announced that she and Rip Mason were engaged. Bonnie Blossman secretly planned an engagement party for the couple; however, Leslie came to the party that she thought was a casual dinner sans her billionaire.

A mortified Leslie proceeded to distract her friends with massive amounts of alcohol and the promise of a trip to New Orleans. Despite no Rip, good times were had by all until Bonnie's husband Jason picked a fight with Leslie's son Tyler. And yet another episode ended with an embarrassed Leslie dragging one of her real/borrowed children to the car. 

Naturally, the women need new used clothes for their upcoming trip to New Orleans, so they go to Connie Dieb's shop. They're very excited about the trip… Bonnie wants to party on Bourbon Street and Connie and DeAynni practically salivate just thinking about the food. Since Connie always misses the disastrous parties – is she really always busy or purposely keeping away from the drama? – she asks for the lowdown on Leslie's engagement party. Bonnie tells Connie that Tyler disrespected Cindy Davis, Jason stood up for Cindy, Jason threatened to break Tyler's jaw, and Leslie acted crazy.
 
Connie is like, Well, that's nice…. off to New Orleans where us girls are gonna go wild! I get the impression that Connie couldn't care less about what she misses at these parties… her script simply dictates that she ask for a recap. 
 
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I don't mean to be redundant, but I know I've said this before…bless Kim Kardashian's heart.  Seriously, bless it.  Not only does the mere mention of her name make people in the states automatically get a rash, now the Middle East is creeped out by her as well.  That's got to be a tough cross to bear, and I don't even care for her.  Yet I feel badly…must be the holidays.

As you all know, Kim has been touring Kuwait and Bahrain touting Millions of Milkshakes.  I'm sure President Obama is super excited about the amount of diplomacy that's happening with that situation!  Anyhoo, I'm sure poor Kim was thrilled at the opportunity to promote the dairy treats on the other side of the world while wearing the finest couture from the Kardashian Kollection and the tiny rapper's new shoe line.  Little did she know she'd be welcomed with protests and discord.  Of course, we probably all figured she would given her recent controversial (and likely clueless on Kim's part) tweets, but she was totally sidelined by her less than stellar welcome.  Damn you, Twitter!

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Kim Zolciak's very public war with her parents continues, but Kim is now trying to put duct tape over her parents' mouths so they can't blab to the tabloids about the truth her. 

The Real Housewives of Atlanta star is seeking a gag order against Karen and Joe Zolciak after they spoke out about Kim's behavior to the media. Kim and her parents are fighting over visitation of her daughters Brielle and Ariana

TMZ reports that last week Kim filed an "emergency motion" asking a judge to squash her parents from discussing the on-going court case. 

Kim's motion states that her parents saying negative things about her to the media are harmful to the girls and it is a smear tactic to make her look bad. 

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