Reality Tea

Kendall Jenner

Kendall Jenner, whoops, I mean just Kendall, has made no secret about her desire to rise to supermodel status. She has covered fashion magazines and held her own strutting down the runways at New York Fashion Week. But now, the 18-year-old is proving that she doesn’t need a stitch of clothing on to produce an absolutely gorgeous picture.

On Saturday, big sister, Kourtney Kardashian, shared the above photo on Instagram of Kendall and captioned it, “Saturday muse.” Muse indeed! Kendall looks sultry and sexy with messy, wet hair and just the right amount of side boob. Kourtney also tagged famed photographer Russell James, alluding to the fact that he took the pic.

Now, what was momager Kris Jenner doing while her daughter was posing nude? Doing what Kris does best — making deals!

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aviva drescher on the cover of millennium magazine

Aviva Drescher is kinda admitting her retirement as a Housewife. Rumored to be fired from Real Housewives Of New York, she talks how the drama took over her life, managing family with reality TV, and continues to insist her “Leg Toss” was unplanned. 

Aviva was nominated for RHONY by friend Bethenny Frankel and claims she was apprehensive about joining the show. “When I was approached to be on RHONY my first response was “Absolutely not. Those women are nuts.” But Aviva’s decision was swayed by the opportunities that could arise through being on Bravo… such as “writing” her book Leggy Blonde. “I was interested to learn about the reality television process and culture, and I was excited to have a job! I had been a stay at home mom for 10 years, which can be mind-numbing,” Aviva shares. 

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teresa and joe giudice plead guilty on rhonj

Last night on Real Housewives Of New Jersey everyone’s favorite lawless Housewife plead guilty to 4 counts of federal fraud.

After praying to God, Teresa Giudice put on her best purple fur coat, forced husband Joe to color-coordinate in a show of solidarity and admitted that you know, maaaaaaaybe, ok posssssssilby, well actually definitely she bought too many sequined bikinis with money illegally obtained. But it’s like Oops – lots of people do this – lots of people commit mortgage fraud so they can have big fancy re-done house showy-offy parties for houses they can’t afford, so why is this happening to her?! WHY?! Why is the government making Gia cry by demanding her parents go to court and possibly jail. Like UGH. But Teresa being Teresa, she just buries her head in a vat of sequins and covers her eyes with her hairline, and drinks another glass of Fabellini. 

With all of that said and done, Melissa Gorga and Dina Manzo feel sorry for Teresa that she’s under so much stress so they decide to plan a vacation to Florida. Like hey, you broke the law – let’s celebrate! 

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Dina Manzo

Last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey focused on Joe and Teresa Giudice‘s plea deal, Amber Marchese‘s over-the-top dramatics, and Dina Manzo‘s charity Project Ladybug. Dina touched on the drama and teased what’s to come in her blog. Florida = the new Scary Island? Pass the popcorn!

To start, Dina talked Project Ladybug and Childhood Cancer Awareness month.

“PERFECT TIMING! I love how this episode has a Project Ladybug focus. Did you know that September is Childhood Cancer awareness month? Yeah, not many people know that, for some CRAZY reason it’s not as prevalent as other awareness months,” shared Dina. “I need a favor, whoever is reading this, if you can post that on your social media sites, I’ll love you forever.”

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marysol patton office

The Real Housewives of Miami’s Marysol Patton may have been unlucky in love throughout her time on the Bravo show, marrying in season one and separating in season two.  And her frenemy, Lea Black even implied that is was a green card marriage at a catty dinner party.

But now, Marysol is reaching out to another Bravolebrity in order to change her luck in the romance department.

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 rhom

On this week’s episode of The Real Housewives of Melbourne, Chyka Keebaugh has invited all the ladies to a much-needed beach getaway. Jackie Gillies and Lydia Schiavello kick things off with a shopping spree to stock up on zebra-patterned caftans from a nearby caftan specialty boutique (these exist). Lydia models a modest Grecian dress and a Jackie steps out in a teeny, tiny leopard-print mini spandex dress and aptly pokes fun at herself by saying she looks like “a stick with big tits”. Ha! Meanwhile, Lydia can only muster, “Oh Wow” (remember, she is just sooooo articulate) the entire time they shop.

Andrea Moss finishes up her packing, ensures her nanny has the 735-point checklist and off they go to airport where the group will be taking private helicopters to Queensland for their vacay.  Surprise, surprise Gina Liano is late. Again.  Janet Roach is about to cut a b*#%h if Gina doesn’t arrive in like 5 seconds. Gina rolls up (how many colbalt blue dresses can one have in their wardrobe anyway??!!) and is hoping everyone is chill for the trip.  

teresa and joe giudice plead guilty on rhonj

Real Housewives Of New Jersey is finally picking up speed in the drama department. And with the release of the mid-season trailer it’s assured that the best is yet to come. Starting with… Teresa Giudice heading to court with husband Joe Giudice to plead guilty to a 41 count federal fraud indictment. Oops we spent money and lied about it! 

Teresa and Joe ended up pleading to 4 and 5 counts respectively with Teresa possibly serving up to 27 months in prison. Their sentencing was just delayed again until October 2nd. This is really going to mess up Bravo’s filming plans isn’t it? They’re hoping to capture Teresa and Joe’s sentencing for the season finale, of course. 

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alexis-vow-renewal

This weekend Alexis Bellino renewed her vows to Jim Bellino in an over-the-top wedding that wasn’t a wedding on David Tutera‘s CELEBrations. And I can see why all of Alexis’ Real Housewives of Orange County castmates couldn’t stand her because Alexis needs sedatives – or some sort of psychiatric drugs. She constantly throws tantrums and is mega attention seeking! 

Alexis wants David at her beck and call and treats him like ‘the help’. Two queens don’t make a right!  To add to the drama, David is also in the middle of planning his daughter Cielo’s first birthday party and is strapped for time. 

Jim surprised Alexis with the concept of a ten-year anniversary renewal by hiring poor to David show up at their house unannounced while Alexis was ‘reading’ the Bible (translation: looking at a children’s picture book version of a Bible while wearing knock-off Chanel). Jim’s surprise gift is that he wants the party to be in a week and he wants something classy and elegant – the irony of classy and elegant being used to describe anything related to Alexis does not escape me. Or David, who smirks at the correlation.

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