If y'all are anything like me, you are still reeling from the first installment of the Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion. Even though it was essentially four against one with Andy Cohen sitting there like a mannequin, I have totally switched gears. I may be the only person who now has no sympathy for Teresa Giudice. I mean, take some responsibility! Geez. I am getting hives just thinking about it.
However, there were some positives surrounding the reunion. What are those, you may ask? Just some narcotics and sky-high ratings, of course!
Wow. Give a girl a sitcom with actual accomplished actors who have been honing their craft for years and she will totally forget from where she came. Here's a quick reminder–NeNe Leakes, you are from a Bravo reality show in Atlanta! You may want to start practicing that humility that your real television star cast mates (you know, the ones who don't do reality television) have always shown.
NeNe has been talking a lot lately about how she may be finished with Real Housewives of Atlanta sooner rather than later so people will consider her to be a legitimate actress who isn't best known for cattiness and girl fights. I have a crazy, out-there plan. Don't be catty and instigate girl fights, and you'll probably do just fine!
Last night was the season finale of Real Housewives of New York and as you well know by now Season Finale is a euphemism for fights, meltdowns, and histrionic antics.
Yep, surreptitious nonsense was the mantra last night as the ladies desperately tried to out-rude each other and deny any infractions once caught. Ok, so not everyone was an outright embarrassment to humanity, but at least three people were! Lets here if for LuAnn de Lesseps – our countess of redemption. She actually behaved semi-classy and um, like, normal-ish last night.
So Carole Radziwill, the le chillest Housewife ever is having some sort of charity ping pong party. Seriously – last night was just events cubed. It was events, events, events – and trips – that's all this whole season was. Which I guess is fine if that's how these women live their lives. It's certainly better than labor and delivery room footage, I suppose.
Carole invited everyone and she's hoping her culottes, borrowed from Lee Radziwill's 1956 summer camp closet, will scare everyone into behaving. It sort of worked – either that or everyone collectively and separately likes Carole enough to keep it in check – at least temporarily. Aviva Drescher arrives with an agenda. And that agenda was to talk about herself at length and dominate all conversations with a litany of complaints about Pinot Singer.
Another Monday night, another episode where people have nothing better to do than meet for a) cocktails; b) lunch; c) breakfast; d) dinner; or e) all of the above. Are the VH1 producers actually asleep when they plan these episodes? Have they just totally given up completely? Oh well. Last night's Basketball Wives LA was more of the same, beginning with Wacky Jackie Christie's attempt at a make-up party.
Draya Michele and Malaysia Pargo are the first ladies to arrive for the soiree. Draya is a tad weirded out by the fact Jackie has framed pictures of the women all over the food table. It looks like a very fancy deli section at your local Harris Teeter. Take the stuff out of the plastic! It doesn't have to be served on a silver platter, but no one wants to see how much you spend on that egg salad! Laura Govan warily arrives second. Draya accuses Jackie of not trusting her to speak with Gloria Govan and calling Gloria herself. Gloria arrives with Brooke Bailey. Jackie shares that Draya is upset with her for calling Gloria, to which Gloria responds, if it weren't for Draya explaining the situation, she would have never come to Jackie's.
Last week, a very married Jason Aldean was photographed kissing on a very not his wife Brittany Kerr at The Den in West Hollywood.
Brittany is a cheerleader for the NBA's Charlotte Bobcats. Also an aspiring singer, Brittany tried out for American Idol in season 11. She was cut before the semi-finals.
After the photos surfaced on TMZ this weekend, the country music star issued a public apology for his cheating ways, calling it a drunken mistake. "The truth is that I screwed up," Jasonsaid. "I had too much to drink, let the party get out of hand, and acted inappropriately at a bar. I left alone, caught the bus to our next show, and that's the end of the story. I ultimately ended up embarrassing my family and myself."
Oh, Teresa Giudice. Didn't your very sweet mama ever teach you that if you don't have anything nice to say, zip it? I'm guessing that old-fashioned adage came before the era of reality TV! In the days following the first installment of the circus of crazy known as the Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion, all eyes are on the ladies as they scramble to defend their deplorable behavior.
In a Bravo blog I'm suuuuure she wrote herself, Teresa sorta, maybe, kinda, a little bit takes accountability while also pointing fingers at others. Just to be fair – all the ladies are behaving similarly! Let's get this started.
"Like every Housewife in every city, I think filming the reunion is one of the worst parts of our job. It's a long, long day, it always gets ugly, it's hard to sit through and even harder to watch. At least this year I knew what I was walking into: I knew the other cast members, even my family, were going to band together to bash me. Last year was a total shock. This year was just sickening and sad."
"They're so desperate to make me look bad. Here's the thing: I don't care. I know who I am and I don't need to prove it to any of them. And I'm certainly not going to waste my off-camera, family time looking up words in the dictionary and making obsessive lists about them."
What happens when you take a show centered around a cooking club in Miami and splice and edit it into a housewives show? You get a boring season with a confusing dinner party in each episode. However, what happens when you revamp that season, let the ladies know to bring the drama, and replace some Basketball Wives with a supermodel and some successful surgically enhanced professionals? Amazingness…that's what. The only constant is Mama Elsa.
Real Housewives of Miami has certainly found its footing as a legitimate member of the Bravo franchise. These women (and their ginormous boobs!) certainly know how to bring the drama. Case in point? Joanna Krupa had a meltdown of epic proportions on the most recent episode, ruining the 10th anniversary party for her fiance's nightclub…all thanks to a cheating DJ. Now that's what I'm talking about, ladies!