Poor Kyle Richards can never do anything right. She always tries to look like the nice girl, the fun girl, the one who is friends with everyone but then she goes and screams in someone's face or blames them for something or does something petty like shooting lasers at their nipples or comes across as obviously fake or outs her sister as an alcoholic on national TV or joins ranks with Adrienne Maloof to throw her former bestie and fan favorite under the bus or is friends with Faye Resnick.
However Kyle's worst offense by far is that she almost always ruins parties. Like all the time. Parties she has, parties she goes to, parties that even get a whiff of her White Diamonds perfume and caftans. Yes, Kyle Richards is a serial party-mucker-upper. Which she never admits to.
And earlier this week on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Kyle had another party that just turned to poop. And it wasn't because of the food. Nope it was because of Faye Resnick sticking her very depleted nose into everyone else's business.
Lisa Vanderpump was well aware that Faye had gotten the skinny from Kyle about what happened with Adrienne and Brandi Glanville so when Faye started blaming Brandi for every bad thing like ever – I mean even that time her credit card got declined at the Neiman's White Sale – Lisa commented that Faye is Kyle's mouthpiece. And it would appear that is entirely the case. Too bad the damage control didn't work.
Oh Phaedra Parks, you always tell it like it is. The lawyer/mortician hybrid from Real Housewives of Atlanta loves to enlighten us all with her Southern analogies and Donkey Booty. While she can be sweet as sugar, I certainly wouldn't want to cross her.
This season we're seeing more of Phaedra (literally! Was she serious with that thong bathing suit??), and we're also getting to see more of her spitfire personality. In other words, we learn that Phaedra doesn't like to share…when it comes to her husband Apollo Nida. Of course, who can blame her?
While some people (ahem… Splits Richards) have a dubious definition of the word "friendship" it seems Brandi Glanville and Lisa Vanderpump have a legit relationship that goes beyond a storyline and some camera time. At least I hope they do!
After Lisa attempted to defend Brandi during Faye Resnick's dinner party attack on this week's Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, she is also speaking out to defend her friend in the press over how she has handled ex-husband Eddie Cibrian's very public affairs.
"There's so much that people don't know, and I wish that you saw more of Brandi as a mother – but she is not allowed to use her children [in the show], which is a shame because that is another whole side of her personality that we don't see, she is a lovely mother and I have spent a lot of time around her with her boys," Lisa shares.
Melissa Gorga has finally "arrived"! It's a Real Housewife rite of passage to record a song and land a book deal. Melissa already tackled the music world (and was quite the overachiever by Housewife standards and recorded more than one) and now she's officially an author!
The Real Housewives of New Jersey star Tweeted a few days ago, teasing that she had HUGE news to rub in Teresa Giudice's face share soon. We aren't always the patient type, but we finally received the press release announcing her new book, "LOVE, ITALIAN STYLE: The Secrets of My Hot and Happy Marriage".
Mrs. Poison explains the whys and whats of her new tome: “I can’t tell you how many times Joe and I are approached by fans asking how they can have a marriage like ours." Adding, “A great marriage doesn’t just happen. It’s a job. I work on my marriage every single day. In LOVE, ITALIAN STYLE, I’ll share the story of my life with Joe, the secrets of how I keep it sexy and real, and how pleasing my husband informs and influences every other aspect of my life. I’ll give readers practical strategies on how to strengthen their marriage, amp up the passion, and the secrets that make my marriage as sexy and hot as it is warm and loving.”
The book is set for release next Fall, just in time for your Xmas wish list. I wonder if it'll bring some competition between Melissa and Caroline Manzo, who is also releasing a new book in March.
TELL US – WILL YOU BUY MELISSA'S BOOK? DO YOU THINK HER CAST MATES ARE JEALOUS?
My good gracious! Another Kardashian post so close to Christmas? I must be on the naughty list this year. I'll be honest, I'd rather receive a lump of coal than to have to pontificate on this fake family during the holidays. I do it for you, dear readers. You mean more to me than my disdain for this crowd. Isn't that what Christmas is all about? You're welcome.
In today's news, Kris Jenner is trying to maintain her now faux marriage to husband Bruce despite a ridiculous amount of divorce rumors circulating in the media. Also, sources are claiming that Nick Cannon was also a victim of Kim Kardashian's infamous sex tape. I can't wait to hear the chain of information that led him to this conclusion!
Finally, Bruce is opening up to the media about his ties to Newtown, Connecticut and the Sandy Hook murders. While typing that makes me want to vomit (let this community grieve without reality television intervention!), it's what he's talking about now. I used to like you, Bruce, but I've lost all respect if you're trying to maintain relevancy in light of this horrific event. Sidebar, and this has nothing to do with this blog, but from here on out (sorry for the soapbox) will we please refer to the Sandy Hook shootings as a mass murder and the man that took those innocent lives (I won't give his name more credence here) as a murderer? I read a compelling article the other day that noted in school shootings the public regresses to words like "shooter" and "victims" instead of using "murderer" and "slain" or "dead" in these types of tragedies. If someone killed a gas station attendant, we'd call it a murder, why don't we say that now? Off my soapbox and onto the Kardashian kraziness. I taught first grade for several years, so I am a tad raw at the moment…as no doubt you are.
Moving along (so, so sorry for the rant!), Kris is determined to make sure that her failing marriage doesn't drown the empire she's created around her children (notice I don't say the empire created FOR her children). What won't this woman do?
Oh, Pauly "DJ Pauly D" Delvecchio…have you been cheating on me? No? Well, you've been cheating on MTV, although I can't say I blame you. You were enticed by the dimples and flashy Kardashian representation that Ryan Seacrest provides. I don't think anyone will judge you.
The acronym creating, high hair wearing, "cabs are heeya" screaming star of Jersey Shore is getting a new show…and it's not on the network that made him an international reality star and a household name. That's right. He's potentially moving on to E! What a tangled web we weave when first we practice to hop to another channel for more money. I'm not hating, Pauly…I want you in my TV line-up regardless.
According RadarOnline, Emily and Jef were "getting very cozy" in Charlotte last week. Radar's source said, "Emily sat on a stool at the bar while Jef stood facing her between her legs. It was obvious they were having some sort of deep conversation, but Emily also had her arms hanging around his neck affectionately at one point."
According to the source, Jef and Emily tried to keep a low profile. As if. "I was surprised at how into each other they were acting because it was clear that they were trying to go unnoticed and didn't want attention from anyone," the source shared. "From what I could overhear, they were having a discussion about their relationship status."
Sigh. Hopefully it was a very short conversation that ended with Jef telling Emily, "Let's just be Facebook friends. I'll poke you every Tuesday night and sometimes on Saturday morning."