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Elsa Patton

 

Real Housewives of Miami starts in two days and to celebrate the hot mess of drama is a whole host of parties! At the offical premiere party thrown earlier this week, unfortunately resident plastic surgery warning Mama Elsa had a little too much fun!

According to Gossip Extra, Marysol Patton's 78-year-old mother collapsed at the Miami Beach premiere party while standing near castmate Lea Black

Mama Elsa apparently collapsed suddenly and in the process took down a whole bunch of bottles and glasses. A video of the incident is below. 

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Love is in the air for the peeps of the O.C.  Vicki Gunvalson is still head over stripper heels for the walking Hallmark card known as Brooks Ayers, and her Real Housewives of Orange County nemesis Gretchen Rossi is still gaga for househusband and whipping boy Slade Smiley.  Can I get a collective "awwwww…."? 

The relationships between the women certainly wasn't peachy keen this past season, but at least they all have full love tanks, right?  Excuse me while I gag.

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Melissa Gorga

The Real Housewives of three locales were out partying together last night! 

Melissa Gorga, Gretchen Rossi and Ramona Singer partied like rock stars at OK! Magazine's Annual Fashion Week Celebration at Cielo New York City. 

Jersey Shore's Vinny Guadagnino also made his first pink carpet appearance with his new girlfriend, Melanie Iglesias. 
 

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Former The Girls Next Door star Kendra Wilkinson is super excited about her husband's newest business venture. Sadly, Hank Baskett's NFL career isn't going so well. He's currently a free agent, but Kendra says he has "moved onto the next phase of his life." 

The good news – Hank has opened a gym in Los Angeles with his friend Travelle Gaines. They named the gym Performance Gaines. Kendra describes the gym as a private training facility where pro athletes can come to train. Kendra could not be more proud of her husband. 

"He loves it," gushes Kendra. "This is exactly what he wanted to do in his life."

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Last night on MTV Real World Spring Break, oh… errrr…Oops! I mean Middle-Aged (Wannabe) Girls Gone Wild. Oh… danggit – I mean Real Housewives of New York! There we go, that's the right show. Anyway, last night on RHONY the battle between Turtletime and Hurricane Aviva continued to rage. I think we're going to have to declare this one a draw because both these crazies went in circles like a typhoon and I don't think anything was resolved! 

So things begin with a little bitching and arguing over what else – girls trip vs. couple's retreat. What about therapeutic retreat? Why didn't Bravo call in some therapists to assist with the lunacy and sit everyone down for a good ol' " I feel" session followed by some team building exercises? 

Over breakfast, Reid and Russ are present and this is not acceptable. A clearly hung-over Sonja Morgan is shoveling in the food at warp speed and complaining about being called white trash. Pinot Singer and Sonja try to "pretend" they have no idea what that even means and hop on Google for a little investigative research. They get on dictionary.com and are most surprised to find a photo of themselves right next to the description. Oh, that can't be because White Trash means "poor" and they are not poor. They are just bankrupt and married to (or divorced from) money. Then someone distracts them by yelling wine and they decide oh, well at least White Trash means you're nice and it doesn't have anything to do with being inhospitable anyway.

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Oh gracious.  Would I be totally remiss to suggest that maybe Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Brandi Glanville and her nemesis/frenemy/mistress turned wife of her ex-husband LeAnn Rimes could possibly in cahoots to get twice the attention?  I mean, first LeAnn checks into rehab because she loses a Twitter battle (Lindsay Lohan, take note) to Brandi's zombie followers, and the next thing you know, there is a rumor circulating that the real reason for the former singer's "exhaustion and anxiety" is that LeAnn's hubby Eddie Cibrian is cheating on his current wife with his former wife.  Follow?  I don't blame you.

If you think about it, it's truly a diabolical plan, and it benefits both of them.  Brandi gets to enact her revenge on her skeezy husband and his homewrecking new wife, while LeAnn finally appears oh-so-slightly sympathetic.  Kind of.  If you can over look the fact that she got into a Twitter war with commoners.  So no, not really.  At all.

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Bachelor Pad Season 3 began with a mix of fan favorites, drunken losers, and super fans. Last week, Nick Peterson and Rachel Trueheart won the final challenge and chose to bring Chris Bukowski and Sarah Newlon with them to the finale. Ed Swiderski and Jaclyn Swartz were eliminated. They were beyond shocked. With a murderous look in her eye, Jaclyn sobbed, "Rachel is dead to me." 

Chris Harrison welcomes back the Bachelor Pad losers… Ryan "not gettin' any" HoagKalon McMahon and Lindzi Cox (cheers), Reid Rosenthal (lukewarm cheer), Jaclyn and Ed, Erica Rose, Jamie Otis (ready for a costume partyabsolute silence), Tony Pieper and Blakeley Jones (cheers), and Michael Stagliano (huge cheer). Also, the super fans – SWAT, David, Donna, Paige, Brittany, and Erica.

The losers vote for the winning couple of Bachelor Pad 3. Who will it be – Nick and Rachel or Chris and Sarah? And, as always, there's only one prize in Bachelor Pad. <wink, wink>

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Photo Credit: TLC via WENN

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