Reality Tea

luann de lesseps in zebra print pants

While Sonja Morgan thinks her “Caburlesque” is gonna become a thing (like “Fetch” is), LuAnn de Lesseps is actually working hard and earning money. Apparently being a former countess agrees with her! 

At a housewarming shindig for her new house in Sag Harbor this weekend, LuAnn was all saucy jokes and quick wit – including revealing how she met her ex-husband and has quite the storied past! LuAnn apparently keeps a journal of all the good jokes she hears and “writes down” the punchlines so she can remember them. 

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amber and jim marchese

Amber Marchese is already cracking under the pressure of Real Housewives of New Jersey and calling foul on the editors and her castmates! 

After looking like a s#*!-stirring suck-up on this week’s episode, with her husband saying he’s not allowed to hang out with the Juicys because of their legal issues, Amber is trying to set the story straight. 

“Neither Jim nor I have ever been judgmental of Joe and Teresa [Giudice]. At this point, we hadn’t even met Joe Giudice, and had only met Teresa once at our party. We knew of their situation, but still opened the invitation to them without regret,” Amber begins. 

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Jill Zarin and Betsey Johnson

After the lowest rated season of Real Housewives of New York, it seems Jill Zarin has put in extra hours as of late to make sure Bravo remembers how fabulous she is. Every Friday, I’m like, Where will Jill pop up this weekend? Most recently, she traded places with Jenna von Oy on Celebrity Wife Swap, she hosted the second annual Luxury Ladies Luncheon, she crashed two parties in Las Vegas, she promoted her new jewelry line on GSN, and she co-chaired the tenth annual A Hamptons Happening.

As you know, several Bravo stars turned up in Las Vegas two weekends ago. Jill popped up, of course, though she did not appear to be directly involved with the events. Gotta love her! This past weekend, Jill, Ramona Singer, and Betsey Johnson posed for photos at the Samuel Waxman Cancer Research Foundation fundraiser A Hamptons Happening. Check out pictures from Vegas and A Hamptons Happening below. It’s like a fun game of Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego Jill Zarin?!

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 vanassa

In last night’s Game of Crowns, the ladies compete in the Ms. New England States pageant. Lynne Diamante plans her fifteenth wedding. Susanna Paliotta’s jumpsuit stylist gets caught in a hornets’ nest. And Vanassa Sebastian, like the mighty eye of Sauron, gathers her army of orcs and seeks one crown to rule them all! Bwahahahaha.

We begin 5 days before the Ms. New England States pageant, a charity event in which Lori-Ann Marchese, Leha Guilmette, Lynne, and Susanna will all compete. Susanna shops for a new gown in one of the tackiest shops I’ve ever seen. Her stylist Anthony helps her choose a dress that will “speak for her.” Susanna’s eldest daughter Victoria meets her at the shop and we learn that she survived a facial injury her senior year that resulted from a teen bullying incident. Victoria entered pageants after reconstructive surgery to rebuild her confidence. Good for her. Hope she stops competing before the world of Mrs. Pageants transform her into a steaming pile of poo like her mom and company.

everyone skips lizzie rovsek's birthday party

On last night’s Real Housewives of Orange County, poor Lizzie Rovsek proved she is unpopular with the ladies and Shannon Beador forgave Tamther (an ill-advised move) in order to get a free vacation in Bali. 

Things begin with Tamra Barney telling Vicki Gunvalson about Ryan’s surprise engagement. Vicki understands given that Briana surprised eloped last season. If your children are always hiding something from you that’s probably a sign that they think you’re crazy. 

However, quickly talk turns to The Shannon Beador Dilemna. Vicki is straight to the point with Tamra that she started causing all this drama and now is stepping back like ‘Don’t look at me! I didn’t do it!’ – and that Heather Dubrow is also being an instigator. Vicki thinks Heather needs to be knocked down a a notch or two to understand empathy. I am loving this equanimous Vicki. More of this please! Less of that rat’s nest on her head that she calls hair, however!

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Courtney Stodden Farrah Abraham Couples Therapy

If you have ever wondered what happened to your favorite couples, or the biggest train wreck couples, from Couples Therapy, then I have good news for you! VH1 recently announced that a Couples Therapy reunion is in the works!

Couples Therapy is taping a special 5-season All-Star Reunion, featuring appearances by some of the most memorable couples from the entire history of the series LIVE onstage before a studio audience,” revealed VH1. “Dr. Jenn Berman will serve as host and moderator for this hi-octane reunion, showing highlights of all the most memorable moments from the series and finding out what has happened with everyone since their experience in Couples Therapy. It will be explosive, entertaining, and a night to remember!”

Courtney Stodden & Doug Hutchison, Catelynn Lowell & Tyler Baltierra, Shayne Lamas & Nik Richie, and Farrah Abraham & Farrah’s Delusions are listed as guests on the ticketing site. Other couples have yet to be announced.

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Brandi Glanville

Brandi Glanville has never been one to shy away from letting us in on every single thing that is going  on in her life. That is why her twitter feed is seriously something of beauty. The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star shares her every thought — from dating drama to the joys of motherhood on the social networking site. And her latest is no different.

Apparently Brandi is up for meeting men anywhere. Even if it is while she is out and about running errands.

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Joe and Teresa Giudice beach

Controversial and fraudilicious the Real Housewives of New Jersey stars Joe and Teresa Giudice spent some quality time with their daughters, Gia, Gabriella, Milania, and Audriana, at the beach over the weekend. Then Tre shared their pictures on Instagram. Because, of course!

Teresa posted the picture above, adding, “With my love on the beach.”

Joe and Teresa are looking like they don’t have a single care in the world – or they are just putting on brave faces – despite facing some serious prison time for pleading guilty to a slew of fraud chargesTeresa and Joe learn their fate on September 23. Until then, Picture Perfect Family R Us! 

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