Reality Tea

Kourtney & Khloe Take the Hamptons

This week’s reality TV viewer numbers are in. We can finally watch all the fake stories Kris Jenner sold to the press the past 6 months play out on Kourtney & Khloe Take The Hamptons. The 3,748th spinoff of Keeping Up with the Kardashians premiered to 1.567 million die-hard fans. Also new to our list this week: the season premiere of Vanderpump Rules attracted 1.25 million.

Love & Hip Hop Hollywood logged its largest audience since the premiere – 2.446 million tuned in to see Hazel and Masika face off.

Part one of Real Housewives of New Jersey‘s reunion attracted 2.285 million viewers. Thanks to RHONJ’s generous lead-in, Manzo’d with Children‘s two-part season finale garnered 1.388 million and 1.144 million. Manzo’d ended season one with an average of 1.27 million viewers. And 1.278 million watched the season finale of Million Dollar Listing LA, bringing its season average to 1.17 million viewers. Will you miss Manzo’d with Children and MDLLA?

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kristen taekman & josh taekman with daughter kingsley in the hamptons

Recycled storyline time! Have marital troubles on your reality show? The next season: film a vow renewal! Last season Kristen Taekman spent nearly every episode feeling invalidated and dismissed by her workaholic, douchebag husband Josh Taekman.

Instead of spending more time in therapy, Josh made things up to Kristen by buying her new boobs for their anniversary.  The couple just completed 1o blissful years together and decided to celebrate by filming a vow renewal for Real Housewives Of New York. Didn’t we already have one of those when Ramona Singer re-pledged her love to Mario? Well, we know how that turned out

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Kim Kardashian arrives at Los Angeles International (LAX) airport

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are spending time in New York this week while Kourtney and Khloe hold down the filming of Keeping Up with the Kardashians’ new season back in L.A..   As always, Kim and Kanye are showing off their finest fashions so us peasants can bask in the presence of the pure genius of it all. 

Kim and her little accessory Nori flew out of LAX on Wednesday night, with Nori decked out in a “Yeezus Tour” jacket promoting her dad – and cut off jean shorts with leggings and black hiking boots.  North’s satin jacket must’ve been pretty slippery because Kim can barely keep a grip on her.

They arrived in NYC and Kim headed out on a date with Kanye, wearing matching Balmain jackets.  Kim forgot to pack pants.  

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The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - Season 5

The Real Housewives franchise has had its share of criticism. Mostly from fans and members of the media. But recently a certain Hollywood actress opened up about her disdain for Bravo’s cash cow.

And to make it sting even more, this certain Hollywood star just happens to be besties with Andy Cohen’s bestie Sarah Jessica Parker and is a frequent guest on Watch What Happens Live!

Any guesses?

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rhonj recap teresa aprea, nicole napolitano defend their men

Last night was the second installment of the Real Housewives Of New Jersey reunion. I don’t want to go into the stupidness that is stupid Teresa Giudice and her stupid financial nonsense and stupid decisions that made her go to jail. I mean damn, read what you sign, ask questions if you don’t understand – hello! 

The most laughable comment from the whole reunion was Teresa trying to convince us that she’s usually a very conscientious-y type of person who “always dots her ‘I’s and crosses her ‘T’s.” First of all, she knows two letters in the alphabet? Bet they were both used a lot in the PLEA AGREEMENT Teresa didn’t read, but signed. Second of all, if you were a routine “i” dotter or a “t” crosser you’d not get indicted for bankruptcy fraud or sign fake W-2s because you’d actually make sure the people you hire, like your accountant, are doing their jobs! And finally – I’m frankly surprised Teresa was able to use that expression correctly. I would fully expect her to say something like “I’m the type-a person who crosses eyes and dots my teacup, with you know, fabulicious teas – coming soon!” 

Let’s just say this, Denial is the longest river in New Jersey. The river of denial flows right out of Melissa Gorga‘s $3.8 million Montville mansion (where they had the big ol’ plumbing disaster and the leaky pipes and the plastic sink) and it roars down the hill into the chicken coops of Teresa and Joe’s purloined marble encrusted converted trailer, built at the base of Mount Tackiola. Now for sale, delusion included in purchase price! 

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tom sandoval disgusted with kristen route and james kennedy

On this season of Vanderpump Rules, newly happy Kristen Doute is supposedly move-on with baby infant boyfriend James Kennedy, a DJ, busboy, #BeamerSelfieExpert and former friend of Tom Sandoval. But Krsiten is still trying to cause trouble for Tom, who also hates James, and now Tom is dishing on what caused his disgust with the couple! 

Tom 1 is hurt by James because they used to be buddies, they made beeeaaauteeefoool music together guys, but then James screwed Tom 1 over for Kristen. And did him dirty. 

“I have every reason not to like James. I walked in on him and Kristen hooking up at my place when Kristen was supposed to be moving out and he was supposed to be moving in,” Tom 1 revealed. “I later found out that they had used my bed and that James had lied to Kristen about me to get her into my bed!”

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Disney On Ice Rockin' Ever After

Dean McDermott has certainly been put through the ringer over the last year. After the news broke last December that he had cheated on his wife, Tori Spelling, the troubled couple chose to document the process of repairing their fractured marriage and Dean’s time in rehab on the Lifetime reality show True Tori.

To say that the show is hard to watch, is putting it mildly. On the heels of his wife’s week long hospital stay for a mental breakdown variety of sicknesses, Dean announced that he is leaving True Tori.

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Kim Kardashian

Photo Credit: Brian To/WENN.com