First, I need to offer my sincerest apologies for missing last week’s Dance Moms premiere recap, but you’ll have to take that up with Mother Nature and her nasty thunderstorms and ridiculously long (and hot and oh so muggy!) power outages. Second, did we really miss much? Abby Lee Miller, true to fashion, flaked on practice and was extra nasty to over compensate for her evident insecurities caused by relocating to Los Angeles. Jill discovered once again that no matter how much bum she kisses, Kendall will never be Abby’s favorite. Basically, Abby was mean, yada yada yada, Nia was discounted, Holly was fuming, Jill was confused as to what exactly she needs to do to cement Kendall in Abby’s good graces, and Maddie was revered. A recap in one paragraph…who knew my wordy self was capable of such a thing?
It’s the second week in LA for the ALDC (this time around, at least), and the moms are still harping on Abby’s erratic behavior. Why anyone is still surprised by her antics is beyond me! The moms are surprised that Abby is in attendance at rehearsal (ehh, she’s “slightly” there), and Abby takes no time building up Maddie and tearing down Nia who doesn’t back down to her teacher. At. All. Go Nia! Of course, Nia ends up on the bottom of the pyramid followed by JoJo for timing errors. Shockingly, Maddie rounds out the bottom rung for not standing out in the group routine. MacKenzie is third for taking direction well, and Kendall is runner up to Kalani’s top spot on the pyramid. Kendall didn’t perform last week, but her video premiered which garnered her a higher spot. Kalani reigns supreme for her exceptional solo. So she forgot a few eight-counts…she improvised like a champ. Jill interrupts to say that a family commitment will keep Kendall from performing this week, but Kendall promises she’ll still be at rehearsals. Abby’s eye rolls say it all.
On last night’s Secrets and Wives, the ladies decide to drag their sorry, hungover butts to an exercise class the morning after partying in Mantauk, where all is not going well among the delusional divorcees of Long Island. Gail Greenberg is leading the boot camp in her all new young person gear. What she’s asking this workout gear to do cannot be done, i.e. turn back the clock like 30 years. Susan Doneson shows up in black lipstick and raccoon eyes ready to feel the burn, but first she must dish to Cori Goldfarb about how she feels attacked by Liza Sandlerand Andi Black at last night’s dinner. Susan has no sh*ts to give about Liza losing her house to a messy divorce. “You’re 47 years old, aren’t you bored?” she wonders about Liza.
Back in LI, Amy Millerdiscovers her son Max has traffic tickets piling up, but Max brushes her off like dust, just like every other man in her life. Max also makes the executive decision to bring a new dog into her home. You know, because he’s a responsible young man who lives with his mom, doesn’t pay parking tickets, dresses like a bunny, and can’t do laundry. Amy blames Max’s distracting behavior for getting in the way of her relationship with Arthur. I blame Max for making me sigh deep, sorrowful sighs over the state of entitled 20-something manboys everywhere. (Seriously, can we not round them all up and set them adrift until they’re house trained?) Amy fears that Max will turn out just like her ex-husband, Max’s father, who…lives with his mom and can’t do laundry. So, yup.
Bethenny had some fun times in tonight’s episode but was brought to tears once again at the mention of her visitation situation. She promises in her blog that this is the last tear she sheds this season. Pinky swear. “Well it isn’t an episode if I’m not crying, so I was true to form here. Thankfully this is the last tear of mine this season. I’m sure you’re not shedding a tear about that.”
Bethenny Frankel is the ultimate conundrum – she doesn’t want anyone in her personal business, yet she won’t she stop talking about her personal business! In her latest confessional interview Bethenny talked marriage, spinoffs, and why listening to other people is a big ole mistake. While her acrimonious divorce from Jason Hoppy remains on-going, Bethenny admits she should have followed her gut and not the paycheck Bravo was dangling in front of her nose and never said “I do!”
Speaking to NYU alumni at a special event, the Real Housewives Of New York star talked lessons she’s learned and deterred others from caving to pressures to get married if it’s not the right person. With a 50% national divorce rate, perhaps Bethenny has a point, but I just can’t stop myself from remembering all the talks Bethenny did about finding your happy and the one and how waiting for Jason was the best thing ever. So, if she knew all along Jason wasn’t the one, what was all that about?
Ironically, Bethenny, who got a degree in psychology from NYU, told an inquiring audience member that she always knew her marriage would fail “I think my instinct and gut going into my marriage [knew] it would turn out the way it did,” she confessed. “I could feel it, but I intellectualized it. People are always talking about ‘Do I go with my head or my heart?’ Go with your gut.” That’s so interesting to me… maybe it was a self-fulfilling prophecy then, Bethenny.
Still maintaining that sharing her marital problems with the world is more helpful than hurtful, Shannon claims that the couples therapy filmed for RHOC’s first two episodes “changed both our lives. I never thought our relationship would benefit as much as it did. I wish you could have seen more of the two days that we spent there—so many deep and touching moments.”
This week on Married to Medicine, Quad Webb-Lunceford decided to give Lisa Nicole Cloud a taste of her own medicine, ordering a background check on her. Quad went the “extra” route and requested a check on Lisa‘s husband and Lisa’s mother’s elbows too. You name it, Quad ordered it.
Quad took to her blog to explain her decision, “It really pains me that I have to conduct a background investigation on someone that I once considered a friend. My intentions were not to hurt or harm ‘She Who Shall Not Be Named’ or her family; however, I did want to set an example as to how NOT to treat a friend. Her behavior and actions were highly disappointing, inappropriate, and unjustifiable. Again, ‘She Who Not Be Named’ and I have never discussed doing business together. I don’t work for her, she doesn’t work for me. She’s not an investor, a stockholder, or a business partner in Picture Perfect Pup – and she never will be.”
As viewers have seen, Traci and Eric have been trying to have a baby since they tied the knot and suffered two miscarriages along the way. They shared those losses with the show’s fans in painful detail on the series, but they are now choosing to keep this pregnancy as intrusion-free as they can.