Good lord last night's episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey was a rare and special breed of ridiculous, wasn't it? So the Gorgadice families went on some silly retreat to put their problems behind them and rebuild. Except it was more passive aggressive blaming and whining from everyone! Yay for something new and exciting.
Things begin over at Casa de Gorga, amid the crumbling faux marble and the collapsing gold-plate archways they are preparing for the big retreat. Melissa Gorga and Poison are doing their vacation dance ritual and getting into the groove by busting some J. Faux moves and encouraging their kids to dance. "Stripper in the house," Poison bellows as his three-year-old twerks, while daddy erratically humps and grinds the air. Yeah! Shake your moneymaker kids. Great parenting…
Antonia helps mommy pack and decides among the must haves are a bible and a stuffed unicorn. Makes sense, unicorns because it would be an absolutely fairy tale to imagine these families getting along. And a bible because you never know who may need an exorcism on a RHONJ trip. All signs point to Teresa!
Gretchen hung out for a few hours, chatting up her fans. The reality star signed autographs and posed for photos (many of which she retweeted over the weekend). She shared after the event, "Another great appearance at Swimspot today! Met so many great people and fans! Thanks to those who came out!"
It's never a dull moment with the girls of Princesses: Long Island. Last night there was more girl drama and PDA to go around, but thankfully the ladies refrained from drink throwing and ugly cry mode. They're really maturing, aren't they?
Joey Lauren, Amanda Bertoncini, andErica Gimbeldecide to go on a run, and I think it's time for Erica to invest in a sports bra. I'm also super curious as to what Amanda is wearing on her bottom half. The girls dish about Chanel Omari's bizarre behavior at Amanda's Drink Hanky party, and Joey questions Ashlee White's snobbery. She gets teary when she hears that Ashlee tried to get Erica and Amanda not to like her. While Amanda likes Ashlee, she knows her friend looks down on Joey for not coming from money. Erica and Amanda give Joey tips on how to compose a mature text to Ashlee to resolve their differences.
Meanwhile, Chanel is channeling her inner SJP circa Square Pegs and meeting with her rabbi in some very Mo Rocco shades. She needs his guidance after her breakdown at the white party. He basically tells her to suck it up and show restraint in the face of drink throwing asshats, although he's much more eloquent. When she expresses her fears over never marrying, he urges her to use Jewish history as inspiration to know that nothing is impossible. I may need to schedule a session with Rabbi Cohen.
One, do you think that any of the cast members from Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta should get the boot from the show? No? Me neither. However, apparently we will be bidding farewell to two of our favorite dramatic reality stars.
The big question–are they two that you could live without on this crazy phenomenon? And how did this come to be? Would you be shocked to find out that the pair allegedly got fired on the spot while filming this season's reunion show last week?
Alright Real Housewives of New Jersey lovers, tonight the shizz is about to go. down. And I really mean it cause it would appear that the Joew on Joew action gets ruthless. Oh Bravo – keeping it classy as always!
Before we get to all that hot messitude, Caroline Manzo is here to answer fans' burning questions. Burning like gonorrhea? In a new interview Caroline says that fan questions is what led to her writing a book and she tried to address their inquiries in the self-help/tell-all Let Me Tell You Something…
We're still talking 'bout Caroline's book? Isn't that old news at this point and being eclipsed by Kathy's upcoming cookbook?
Tom dished, "Sonja gave an unprepared and somewhat rambling thank you speech (but she looked hot so who cares). It seems Aviva has made nicey-nice with her ex hubby Harry Dubin as he sat having friendly conversation with the ladies (Sonja, Aviva, Luann and the new girl) while they filmed for the show. I guess he's all caught up on his alleged past due child support?? Maybe he was dropping of a check? I didn't even know he existed."
According to Tom, the party was cramped and hot with a cash bar with, "some dude rationing out some drink tickets (2 to a person) to the VIPs. Near the end they ran out of tickets and I heard the waitress ask Luann for her credit card which she gave to pay for the last round and a bottle of Ruffino sparkling wine that I drank with some friends (Thanks Countess!)."
Tom shares that there was a lot of filming going on for the new season – and he even ruined Aviva's entrance footage. "While walking in I kissed Aviva hello as she was getting out of her towncar. She kiss me and said ''You messed up the shot''. So they did it over. Sorry Aviva!! So much for unscripted."