Reality Tea

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This week Kenya Moore started off a little more even-keeled on Real Housewives of Atlanta than she normally does.  She showed up to NeNe's on time and seemed genuinely excited to go on the trip to Savannah with her co-stars.  The kray kray came later, of course, but still..she gets points for effort! 

Kenya took to her Bravo blog to clarify a few things, including her comment that Kandi Burruss could afford to skip a meal.  She says that it was all said in good fun.   "I made a wise crack at Kandi saying she could skip a meal. Kandi knows I think she has a great figure, so I’m sure she laughed as we have together about the 5-10 pounds she wants to lose. I’m not a tiny girl myself, and I appreciate a woman with curves. I won Miss USA at 128lbs and I’m now a healthy 145-150lb at 5’10”."  Kenya has been well trained in the art of shameless plugging now that she's a full-fledged reality star, "As women, we know 5lbs is everything to us, but I simply encourage all women to be healthy. My best selling workout DVD “Booty Boot Camp” is available worldwide on Amazon.com."

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vpr-recap

Last night tables turned wildly on Vanderpump Rules when one drunken girl proved that loose lips do in fact sink friendships of convenience with co-workers you don't really like!

Before any of that happens we are treated to the tragic sighting of Stassi Schroeder's a$$. No, no I didn't write "Stassi being an a$$" or "Stassi is an a$$", but literally Stassi's a$$. She spread her cheeks for a bikini waxing. Decency is dead, folks! Apparently the best way to cleanse yourself of the ex you don't really want back but want to keep manipulating is to go hairless!

Stassi makes Katie Maloney go with her but Katie has never waxed. Katie never will again. It's taken me forever to figure out why Katie, whom I refer to as Anonymous Stassi Schroeder Friend No. 1, would dye her hair that unflattering color – and then it hit me. She's literally trying to be Stassi. Same hair style (but shorter), same side part, same color-ish, same mean girl antics. #FalseIdol

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Michaele Schon And Neal Schon Wedding

Don't stop believin' in fame mongers' creativity! Former Real Housewives of D.C. and White House gate crasher Michaele Salahi has fulfilled every little girls' wedding fantasy by marrying an 80's rock star…on Pay-Per-View.

Michaele and Journey guitarist Neal Schon wed Sunday in front of family, friends, and whoever was dumb enough to pay $14.95 to watch the entire scene go down on television. Granted, a portion of the viewing price went to charity, but still. Is this what we're coming to as a society? Don't answer that…

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Kim Kardashian Leaving Mashu Salon

Do you have a ten-year plan? I do, and it involves a bestselling novel turned blockbuster movie starring Ryan Gosling…and a relationship with Ryan Gosling. Hey girl, it could happen!

Kim Kardashian also has hopes for where her life will be in a decade. Fear not, it will likely still be playing out in front of our eyes as I can't imagine this family has any plans to leave E! anytime soon. Kim recently revealed that she'd like to have two more children with Kanye West. Of course, the family will need an East and a South as siblings for baby North.

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rhobh-recap-brandi

I don't even know what to say about last night's episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

Things begin with Dinner Party From Hell 8.0. Kyle Richards and Yolanda Foster are agreeing to disagree by disagreeing when Brandi Glanville stares Kyle down with an unfocused glare and some threatening, slurry words about how she could say a lot of bad things about Kyle. Bad, bad things. Like for real mean stuff.

Lisa Vanderpump warns her to knock it off, but "know this" Brandi sees things. Weren't you just waiting for her to whip out that electronic cigarette?! Brandi was a wreck and needs: blotting papers, powder, detox, a nap, water, psych drugs, to get off my TV.

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I believe that Kim Zolciak said it best (thanks to Kandi Burruss) when she belted out "Don't Be Tardy for the Party," but of course, NeNe Leakes isn't going to touch that line with ten-foot pole while complaining about her co-stars lack of consideration on Sunday's episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta.

Instead, the Neenster comes up with a hilarious new nickname for Phaedra Parks. No, it's not the Head Doctor…that's so last week!  This week, NeNe has dubbed Phaedra the "mortician of manners" after showing up three hours late to leave for the girls' trip to Savannah. I think I would have left her donkey booty.

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cynthia-bailey-peter-thomas

One can always count on Peter Thomas to attempt a business venture. Who cares if it works right?!

Cynthia Bailey's husband announced on twitter last night that he is now the co-owner of Uptown Maz and he wants us to "go out and cop it." 

The Real Housewives of Atlanta star included a photo of the magazine's cover. 

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Photo Credit: Twitter

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