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It’s time for an update on those crazy thirty-year-old adults kids from the Jersey Shore!  On tap today, we have have a ridiculously rich fist pumper, a very relieved former pill popper, and the announcement of the premiere date for what will likely be the gang’s (or at least Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi’s) final season of the show.

Forget GTL, everyone’s favorite future pseudo uncle needs a new catchphrase–GTM2, as in gym, tan, make millions.  Forbes just released its list of highest paid deejays, and Pauly D was number 7 in the rankings.  The easy-going prankster can clearly spin some turntables as it’s being reported he made $11 million in the last twelve months.  Yes, you read that correctly!  How does one learn to spin tunes?  I could surely be a blogger by day and a deejay by night, right?  Who needs sleep?  Given that Pauly has his own spin-off, a line of clothing, his name on some tanning lotion, and a set of headphones he markets with 50 Cent, it’s safe to say that Pauly is more than just an orange face a pretty face.  He’s a cash cow with gravity defying hair!

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Kim Granatell is, like, desperate for some attention. Like really, really desperate. Pay attention to her puh-lease, Andy Cohen! The wannabe Real Housewives of New Jersey star continues her reign of terror by speaking out against the woebegone Teresa Giudice. Poor Teresa – she hasn’t a friend in the world. Oh, except for her makeup artist!

In Kim G.’s latest assault on reason and sanity, she announces that Teresa is just as guilty as her husband Joe Giudice and deserves jail time as well!

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Our favorite reality stars can’t get enough of the limelight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to Twitter to share even more details with us.  And we love them for it!  Here’s a roundup of some of our favorite photos from the Twitterverse this week!  Enjoy!

Above is Real Housewives of New Jersey star Kathy Wakile, who shared “Pikes Street Market ! The Flowers are Spectacular!!”.

Below you’ll find Shahs of Sunset stars Reza Farahan and Golnesa GG Gharachedaghi, Gretchen Rossi, Teresa Giudice, Sammi Sweetheart, Khloe Kardashian, Tami Roman, Phaedra Parks, Kandi Burruss, Kyle Richards and more!

[Photo Credit]

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Mama Kardashian, aka Kris Jenner must’ve had one too many margaritas at dinner with Nicole Richie and Khloe Kardashian, as she got a little..um..spicy? She took to Twitter to share the above photo, captioned with ‘Twitter or Titter??’.

Give us your best shot at captioning Kris’ saucy photo, as we’re rendered speechless over this one.

 

[Photo Credit: Twitter]

O. M. G. Oh. Em. Gee.  OMG, OMG, OMG.  I thought I’d heard it all when I learned that RHONJ’s Teresa Giudice would be “hosting” her own cruise.  Imagine my shock when I find out that Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’ Taylor Armstrong has also secured her own vacation destination…if that destination is a ship that sets sail for the warmer weather.  So, let me get this straight…when your reality television fan base retreats, the next best thing is to host a week long party on an ocean liner?  Consider me schooled.

Taylor is the newest housewife to dig her claws into the cruise ship craze.  Wait, can I actually call it a ‘craze’ given that Teresa is the only other housewife from Bravo’s franchise to venture into these uncharted marketing waters?  When did a meet and greet not become enough?  Seriously?  Who is so narcissistic that they think their fans will pay out the wazoo to vacay with them on a ship when the chances of actually seeing them are slim to none?  I don’t know…but I’ll be right back, because I am totally booking this shiz RIGHT NOW for entertainment’s sake.  Wait, does that make me part of the problem?

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The Belladonna dress strikes again!  A few weeks ago it was worn by RHOC star Alexis Bellino at an event in Vegas, and then by actress Serinda Swan on the red carpet.  This time Real Housewives of New Jersey star Melissa Gorga was spotted wearing the dress-of-the-month at a party in Atlantic City.

We have to hand it to these housewives, they’re more frugal than we give them credit for – the dress, designed by Abyss by Abby, only costs $250! It’s such a good steal, it made even more red carpet appearances – see the photo here.

TELL US – WHO WORE THE STUDDED BELLADONNA DRESS BEST?

[Photo Credit – Twitter & Twitter]

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Oh good lord – please accept that your 15 minutes of fame are up and get a real job. Oh, did I say that out loud? Anyway, Micah Tanous, husband of ex-Real Housewife Of Orange County star Peggy Tanous has taken to twitter to accuse his wife’s former co-stars of paying for their hundreds of thousands of twitter followers.

I mean everyone knows number of twitter followers = amount of self worth, right? Only if you’re a D-List Celebrity! In an accusatory tweet, Micah announced: “I just answered a call from the company that is SELLING all the current #RHOC cast their Twitter followers, What a F’ing Joke! Fake likes!?!”

Tamra Barney, always quick with the reply and self-defense immediately shot back with, “that’s bullshit…I have never bought a follower in my life!!!!”

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Well, that was a hot mess of ugly wasn’t it? On last night’s episode of Project Runway the designers were required to find inspiration for a red carpet look from some sort of new Lexus (i.e. shameless product plug which I ignored because it has nothing to do with fashion). If all of that wasn’t exciting enough, they had to work in teams of two (aka: drama-bitchest extraordinaire.).

After making googly eyes at the car and learning the body color must be featured in the design, there’s a twist! They have to design for a “celebrity”!

And not just any “celebrity” – a former PR alum. All of which but Laura Bennett came from the much less exciting Lifetime years of the series. All of the “celebrities” were women, which was good all for everyone but Raul and Alicia, who have nary any experience in the evening gown department. Oopsie!

The returning designer celebrities were Anya Ayoung-Chee (still not wearing sleeves, I noticed!), Mila Hermanovski, Laura, Irina Shabayeva, Kenley Collins (still loud and bossy as ever!), April Johnston (now with hot pink hair), and Valerie Mayen (who?).

The guest judge was… Oh wait, I forgot because her critique went like this ‘I don’t like that. The Emmy’s? Never been! I wore something like that once. Oooh, shiny!’ Can’t they get any people actually involved in the fashion business to participate in this show or has it truly lost all credibility?

Since nobody cares about anything but the clothes, Reality Tea is providing you a snap-judgement photocap. C’mon you know that’s how you watch the show, too!

OK, let’s trash discuss some looks!

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