I am really having a hard time watching this mess. I can't even think of a witty introduction to last night's Dance Moms because I personally want to rip that bump-it out of Abby Lee Miller's hair every time she speaks. The girls have gone from fun-loving talents to terrified robots. Shame on her.
Abby, Melissa, and her daughters arrive in Los Angeles so that MacKenzie can get into the recording studio. What is Abby now? A pop star manufacturer? Abby wants to make sure that MacKenzie has the personality and energy to be a mini-Katy Perry. She interrupts the session to tell the poor girl that she is performing like Brooke, and that isn't a compliment. MacKenzie puts a little oomph into her singing, and Abby is finally seeing her star potential…at least one of us is. She and Abby head back to Pittsburgh while Maddie stays behind for a performance of her own.
With the start of the pyramid, Abby reminds the girls that she is looking for a dancer to be her Maddie when Maddie is off doing more important things…like a job in L.A. Nia is at the bottom because of her headpiece debacle, followed by Kendall. She's clearly the reason that her duet with Kalani didn't place first as Kalani and Maddie took the top prize in their duet. Of course, Kalani learns a bit about Abby and her fickle ways when she goes from the top of they pyramid to the bottom row. Chloe is third and praised for her duet Maddie, but she needs to work on her facial expressions. MacKenzie is in second for her brilliant work with the candy box in the group number. Christi wonders why MacKenzie is above Chloe after Chloe won both of her dances. Duh, Christi! The candy box! When Maddie is once again in the top spot, Jill scoff that it's predictable.
Those expecting a return of Paige and Brooke for the rest of the season will unfortunately be disappointed, because Kelly vs. Abby was all too real and the girls are officially done with the show. Paige confirmed it on twitter.
After the episode aired Kellyfiled a $5 million dollar lawsuit against Abby and the producers alleging that Abby physically intimidated her and she only slapped her in self defense. In documents pertaining to the suit, uncovered by The Hollywood Reporter, more information about Kelly, Paige, and Brooke's experiences on the show are revealed. And yikes – this show is even worse than we imagined!
I don't even have words for Abby Lee Miller, and I have started to dread watching Dance Moms. My heart breaks for these little girls! New dance mom Kira and daughter Kalani have replaced Kelly, Brooke, and Paige, as Abby has kicked them out of the studio and banned them from the premises after Kelly broke her bump-it. Abby warns Kira that the moms can be vicious so she'd better have up her guard. Holly, Melissa, and Jill question how long Kira will be joining them, but they don't get any straight answers.
Not surprisingly, Brooke and Paige are at the bottom of the pyramid. Abby reminds everyone that they are no longer a part of the ALDC. Then why put them in the pyramid at all? Nia follows for messing up during the group number. Chloe rounds out the bottom, with Abby reminding her that usually when she does duets, she gets first place. Well, she would have gotten first had Abby not entered Maddie and Kalani at the last minute! Kendall is in the fourth spot because she was fine in the group dance and Jill kept her mouth shut. MacKenzie is in third, and Abby warns her to watch out because she's seen a lot of talent. Maddie is in the second spot, and her face says it all. Kalani is on top, which confuses the moms.
It was the bump-it pull of a Lifetime. Literally. Last week's Dance Moms erupted in a volcano of crazy and violence when Kelly Hyland pulled Abby Lee Miller's hair after being provoked with some insane teeth chomping on the part of the world's most hateful dance instructor! Not only that, but Melissa totally lied to her fellow moms when she claimed to not know that daughter Maddie would be competing in a duet with one of the finalists from Abby's Ultimate Dance Competition. And, of course, these mothers just can't get over themselves or Melissa's betrayal. I love that they pretend they wouldn't do the same for their kids to get ahead…
Making sure we all know just what a liar Melissa is, Christi recently tweeted, "FYI: in the car, on the way to the comp in the Bronx, Melissa said to me & Kelly: ur gonna hate me today. She KNEW about the duet," later commenting to a follower, "We didn't even know Kalani was in New York City, let alone dressed and ready for the duet. We found out on way to stage."
The Dance Moms star claims Abby is a bully who attacked her and she is seeking $5 million dollars is damages! The two erupted into a fight on this week's episode which culminated with Abby calling the cops on Kelly. Abby has since obtained a no-contact order.
Upon seeing how everything played out, Kelly is striking back by suing Abby and the producers for assault, defamation, and breach of contract.
I can't with Abby Lee Miller. I just can't anymore. She's not really this horrible, is she? On last night's episode of Dance Moms, she was sabotaging her girls left and right. In Pittsburgh, Abby is still unhappy over a less than stellar showing at the last competition. She can't even enjoy that the group number was the highest scoring routine of the event. Jill reminds Abby that bringing Chloe 2.0 took time away from Abby's actual team. Abby spent far too much time bringing Chloe 2.0 up to speed. Abby agrees…bringing on one new dancer to replace one member of the ALDC wasn't the best idea. She plans to form an entirely new team to beat her current girls. Only Maddie may get to be a part of this elite squad known as the special victims unit.
During the pyramid, the original Chloe is on the bottom for her fourth place solo, followed by Kendall and then Nia for not winning their duet. Jill and Holly couldn't care less. They know their daughters did far better than anyone could have with such little instruction. MacKenzie rounds out the bottom for not having enough stage presence in the group dance. Brooke is last on the second rung for not pushing herself. Her sister Paige is second on the pyramid with Maddie on top. For this week's New York City competition, both of Kelly's daughters get solos, and Paige also gets a placed in a duet with Chloe. Abby hopes that Kelly will look at this as an opportunity for Paige to shine instead of complaining her daughter is under too much pressure to learn multiple dances. Abby then invites Kelly, Christi, and their daughters to accompany her to the open casting call in NYC. When questioned about the remaining team members, Abby reveals that there is another competition in town in which Nia, Kendall, MacKenzie and Maddie will be performing.
Abby Lee Miller never ceases to amaze me with her hatefulness as she pits Chloe against…Chloe? This show is totally fake, right? On last night's Dance Moms, the troupe convenes for the pyramid, but instead of praising the girls for their great victories in the last competition, she goes through a laundry list of Kelly and Christi's bad behavior. Next she introduces the team to "the new Chloe" who she found at the open call in Orlando. She makes the Chloes stand side-by-side, and poor vintage Chloe looks totally crestfallen. I wonder if Chloe 2.0's mom knows what she's gotten her daughter into with Abby!
MacKenzie is on the bottom for not winning her division followed by Brooke who is a slave to her smart phone. Paige places one step higher than her sister for technical issues. Kendall rounds out the bottom. Chloe is the last on the second rung for not being perfect in the trio. Third from the top is the new Chloe. Why not? That's totally fair. Maddie takes the second spot, and girlfriend does not like it when she's not on top. She should never play poker. I am so proud of Nia for making it to the top of the pyramid. Well deserved, for sure! Kendall and Nia will be performing a jazz routine. Old Chloe and new Chloe will dancing head to head in solos. Melissa starts to shake…why can't Maddie compete against the new Chloe?
The newbies are invading Dance Moms and Abby Lee Miller couldn't be more excited. Melissa is homeschooling both Maddie and MacKenzie so they can have more time to dance. Why are they wearing full make-up? Both Maddie and MacKenzie are happy. Melissa is happy. Most importantly, Abby is thrilled, and really, that's all that matters to Melissa, right? Jill is trying to decide if homeschooling would be right for Kendall so she can step up her game.
Abby calls her girls together and congratulates them for beating Kathy's Candy Apples, and then she quickly reminds them that she kept enough recruits from her Orlando open-call to replace the entire team…even Maddie. Melissa wasn't expecting that bombshell! Abby is excited to scope out the talent in Atlanta. Holly volunteers her services as a former school recruiter to help with the trip…and spy. Melissa then offers up her daughters and herself to sell Abby's merchandise at the auditions. I'm surprised she's able to speak with her face shoved so far up…well, you know.