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Abby Lee Miller

dance moms

I'll be honest, I don't know if I'm emotionally prepared for this premiere…or the season for that matter.  Of course, I can't wait…especially when we get to see a glimpse into Abby Lee Miller's love life.  There seemed to be a lot scripted, but it was still flipping amazing. 

The third season of Dance Moms starts with the girls and moms reunite in the parking lot after a long break during the competition season.  Noticeably absent are Kelly, Paige, and BrookeAbby is beyond pissed at Kelly for breaking up the team, but she's equally as upset with the other girls for not consistently coming to practice during their break…news she just found out having spent her break in L.A. filming her spin-off competition show.  She immediately tosses the pyramid head shots in the trash because none of them belong on the top, and the girls become teary when Abby announces that she's holding an audition to replace Brooke and Paige before the group heads to a competition in Denver. 

The girls are rehearsing their group number, Angels and Demons…except now it's just Angel Singular and Demons because that's what happens when people are quitters.  Is it just me or when Abby describes the characters in her choreography do you think she's envisioning herself as the victim or protagonist?  "This dance is about an angel who is strong, but she has all of these horrible awful bleached blonde crazies with acrylic nails demons trying to tear her apart."  Give me a break!  In the viewing room, Jill is hoping that she can get the other moms onboard with calling for a reinstatement of the pyramid.  She hates Abby trashed it without giving her daughter any opportunity to be at the top.

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DanceMoms

It's a Dance Mom's extravaganza!  Lifetime knows a good thing when it pas de bourées in the ratings, and the network is going to milk this cash cow for all it's worth.  You know what that means?  It means that last night you were treated to two and half hours of Abby Lee Miller and the drama mamas.  It felt like Christmas all over again, didn't it?

In the hour leading up to the season three premiere, Jeff Collins returned to lead yet another reunion type show, only this time the ladies would be highlighting the upcoming drama instead of rehashing the past.  Let's see how this works.  Abby is wearing a lot of sequins and bling and spray tan.  Taking a few questions from the studio audience, she reveals that she has a special man in her life, and the mothers are the most selfish people on the planet.  Okey, dokey.  Poor Jeff looks one Ambien shy of hibernation, but luckily the stage setting mirrors (literally!) Abby's outfit, so all the twinkling should keep him awake at least until the premiere begins.  He is going to bring out the moms to have some one-on-one time with Abby and the audience.

Holly is the first to untangle her way through the sequined streamers, and she is wearing a tomato red number that seems to combine the finest vinyl with raw silk.  Abby immediately comments about it under her breath to Jeff.  Holly often gets on Abby's nerves, what with her professional demeanor and her need to analyze things.   Holly takes one audience member's question, and responds with a non-answer before making a swift exit.

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jessica-simpson-christmas

Oh, it's so sad when the holidays are over. I don't know about you but I get post-Christmas depression. So instead lets gawk at how our favorite reality stars spent their holidays! Below are tweets and photos for the holiday wrap up. Enjoy! 

Above Fashion Star host Jessica Simpson confirmed she was pregnant again with the above photo! ""Merry Christmas from my family to yours!" she tweeted

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Abby Lee Miller and her troupe of over the top crazy mothers will be dancing back onto Lifetime soon for the third season of Dance Moms.  Personally, I'm more looking forward to seeing the super talented kids than the mama drama, but I know I can't have one without the other!  It helps to think that they are all really just amping up the insanity for the cameras, because I truly believe that all of the moms are actually good friends, and Abby can't really behave like she does in real life.  Right?

Melissa Gisoni is mom to Abby's pet Maddie and spitfire MacKenzie.  She's often criticized by the other ladies for brown nosing Abby, as well as the amount of special treatment Maddie garners.  Her recent engagement was a story line in the sophomore season, with Melissa's lawyer sending all of her co-star moms cease and desist letters when they mentioned her fiance on the show.  Okay, so maybe they aren't that good of friends…

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Well, America's favorite self-esteem destroying dance teacher is back! Abby Lee Miller is all set to return to battle the ultimate stage moms in Dance Moms season 3. 

It seems all the originals are back for round 1000 of being abused, ridiculed, and scremed at. Not to mentioned the requisite mom-to-mom battles. 

The Flash Dance inspired trailer is really adorable. Jill and Kendal are obviously back on the squad for good. And it looks like Abby Lee has lost some weight! 

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She's back and larger than life…and before you get on me, I'm talking about her over-the-top personality.  Dance Moms' Abby Lee Miller is no stranger to controversy or ridiculous statements targeted at her young dancers, but isn't that why we watch? 

The sharp-tongued studio owner and choreographer is back, with her show's newest season premiering in January of the new year.  I've been watching this show since it started, and several things remain the same.  The moms are still crazy, Abby's teaching style is still incredibly offensive, the young dancers are still as precious and talented as ever, and the more popularity the show gains, the more scripted I'm convinced it's becoming.  But again, isn't that why we watch?

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Happy Election Day, dear readers! Since everyone is in a voting state of mind we decided to have a little fun on this ever-so important day.  Reality TV stars are always campaigning for favoritism (and sometimes buying their fans on twitter), so we got wondering, what stars could we – in our wildest dreams – see make it to the White House?

So cast your ballot for one of these fair candidates below. And remember this is all in fun so keep it funny, snarky, and apolitical! 

1. Caroline Manzo: She ruled Real Housewives of New Jersey with an iron fist – until Teresa Giudice went rogue!

2. Kris Jenner: The pimpmomager is a PR machine who is constantly juggling a thousand things. Plus, the Keeping Up With The Kardashians folks have as many skeletons in their closet as any good politician. 

3. Abby Lee Miller: She will frighten and intimidate foreign leaders into staying in line – or else! 

4. Donald Trump: Our national embarrassment (that hair!) might as well take it all the way. Plus, he could hopefully pay for his own campaign. 

5. Shaunie O'Neal: The HBIC of Basketball Wives knows how to dodge flying wine bottles, flinging insults, and a whole host of unruly people with a half-smile. I think she could whip congress into shape without so much as smudging her lipstick! 

[Photo Credit:Caroline Torem Craig/ WENN.com ]

CAST YOUR VOTE BELOW!

 

Well, it's Hurricane Sandy out there. I've already hunkered down with chicken wing dip and a vain hope that I won't lose power or internet while the winds howl wildly. And I'm not the only one, plenty of reality stars are stranded on the east coast trying to brave the hurricane. 

We hope everyone is safe and in a comfortable place to ride out the storm! 

Below are some of their reactions on twitter! Above Real Housewives of Miami star Karent Sierra wrote: "Waiting for the hurricane… with Joanna Krupa." Both are stranded in NYC after a WWHL appearance!  

Poor Kalyn Braun is currently in New Jersey braving through the storm! 

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