It’s finally here. The most amazing Bachelorette finale ever. (No, really, it might be true this time.) Who does Emily Maynard love more - Jef Holm or Arie Luyendyk, Jr.? Will Emily’s chosen one propose? Chris Harrison welcomes us to the three hour finale of the Bachelorette. (Three hours!) Grab a drink, a snack, and a box of tissues, because Chris promises good stuff. He better not be lying.
Emily‘s parents and brother are in Curacao to meet Jef and Arie.
First up, Jef! Suzy, Emily’s mom, asks Jef how his family feels about Jef looking for love on this crazy show. Jef’s family is skeptical, because Jef’s family is smart. But, of course, they were completely sold on the idea after meeting Emily. Suzy and Jef sit down for a chat. Jef wants to be a good husband and father. He’ll accept Ricki as his own. Jef wants to marry Emily, she completes him. Suzy thinks Jef is a good fit for Emily.
Emily’s brother Ernie is the next one to grill Jef. Jef asks Ernie if Emily is ready to settle down with somebody. Ernie says, oh, no, Emily does not settle. If Emily doesn’t feel right about it, it won’t happen. Jef thinks what he and Emily share is special. He’s excited about a future with Emily. Ernie thinks Jef’s intentions are good. Ernie loves that Jef talks like he’s reading greeting cards.
Jef is nervous about talking to Emily’s dad. Jef is mentally preparing to ask for Emily‘s hand in marriage. Jef wouldn’t feel right taking the next step with Emily without Dad’s blessing. Lucky for Jef, Dad isn’t a hard sell. He hands it right over.
Needless to say, Kalon’s journey on the Bachelorette did not end well. Kalon’s unapologetic ways and big personality, however, make him a perfect fit for Bachelor Pad. Something went right at the Pad, because Kalon agrees! “I’m so glad I did Bachelor Pad. It was like night and day from Bachelorette. I had the most amazing time doing it, and I’m ready for fans to see me in a new light,” Kalon told Celebuzz.
When asked about his experience on Bachelorette, Kalon sings a much different tune. Kalon is not happy about the “bad boy” edit he received.
The Bachelorette aired its Men Tell All special on Monday, bringing back the men who failed to captureEmily Maynard‘s heart, to show and tell us nothing new. The show’s viewership was down 12% from the Fantasy Suite dates and tied a season low. Still, while low for The Bachelorette in general, the Men Tell All was Monday night’s most-watched show, bringing in more than 7 million viewers for ABC.
Following the Fantasy Suite dates, Emily sent home fan favorite Sean Lowe, breaking his heart. All together now – AWWW. So sad.
Many fans of the show were hoping for an Emily loves Sean ending. The Sean fans are downright upset Emily didn’t choose Sean, their favorite. (Obviously not Emily‘s favorite but who cares.) What if Emily pulls a Mesnick on the live After the Rose special and asks Sean to come back to her?
“Not happening. There’s no way. I’m not going back,” says Sean. “Not that it’s so egregious, but at the end of the day she thought Jef and Ari were better fits. The girl I’m gonna be with is gonna have no doubts about me.”
The Men Tell All, The Parade of Tools, The Reincarnation of the 3 Stooges… however you label it, it’s still the Bachelorette starring Emily Maynard<yawn> Two hours of video recaps and retells taped in front of one very reactive audience <SCREAMS!> makes me wish I drank wine.
Chris Harrison welcomes us by asking, “Who here would finally like to see Emily find the love of her life?” Raising my hand! If it means she’ll go away, then, by all means, let’s get this woman hitched. Jef Holm and Arie Luyendyk, Jr. are not there, but the men who escaped a lifetime of love few short months of happiness with Emily are. Yippee.
Sean is there! <SCREAMS!> Kalon is there! <BOO!> Seriously, the audience is so over the top.
“I will confirm it, he’s not the Bachelor, we’ve not named anybody to be the Bachelor yet,” the show’s host tells the site.
“We don’t need to, we don’t name anybody so early,” Chris explains. “I love the speculation and that people are talking about our show but we just don’t need to make decisions yet.”
Don’t get him wrong, he loves Roberto. He says, “He is a great guy, I love Roberto. First of all I hear he’s stunningly handsome, and he’s a very nice guy, he has a lot to offer and would be a great Bachelor. I would put my vote behind him but luckily I don’t have a vote.”
Sean is strong, funny, and sensitive. Emily thinks he’d be a great father figure to Ricki. Jef has style. Jef is kind and thoughtful, with a great sense of humor. Emily feels as if Jef gets her like no one else ever has.
Emily’s favorite things about Arie are his upper lip, his bottom lip, and his tongue. Emily cries when she thinks about Arie. Is it because she knows he’s the one or because she knows he’s not the one and she’s already mourning those kisses?
Ali Fedotowsky‘s ex-fiancé Roberto Martinez is rumored to be the next Bachelor. With Roberto and his delicious dimples getting so much attention, is former Bachelor and Bachelorette star Ali also hoping for another chance? Returning to the show isn’t out of the question. Brad Womack recently gave it another try. He’s still single and now we’re stuck with the yawn-fest that is Emily Maynard, but he tried. Will Ali follow Brad’s example and return to the show?
“I don’t think so – at least, not in the near future. I think it’s way too soon for something like that. So not right now, no,” she tells Wetpaint. So, that’s a no to the Bachelorette (for now). Ali‘s single and ready to mingle though!! Ali says, “I’m single right now. I’ve actually been single this entire time, despite what you may have heard! I’ve been on one or two semi-dates…I’m not even sure you would call them actual dates. But I’m ready. I’m ready!”
Bachelor Pad returns on July 23 on ABC! Which The Bachelor and The Bachelorette rejects will get a second (third, fourth, fifth) chance at finding true love on reality TV? Ha, only if you’re Holly Durst and Blake Julian. More than likely, this ego-heavy cast is more interested in hooking up and collecting the cash prize of $250,000. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I like my TV to be dirty and not too deep.
New twist this season – six hand-selected super fans of the franchise will join the Bachelor Pad fun. Fresh meat!!
Perhaps one of the most self-absorbed contestants is none other than Emily Maynard‘s pariah Kalon McMahon. Kalon, the luxury brand consultant whose preferred mode of transportation is a helicopter, got himself kicked to the curb this week after referring to Emily’s daughter as budget-basement baggage. The comment brought out Emily’s West Virginia hood rat backwoods side, which is the most exciting thing to happen all season. If Kalon can bring personality out of Emily, I’m all for his presence on the Bachelor Pad!