Ashlee Wilson-Hawn

Ever since Big Rich Atlanta premiered, an annoying little gnat has been flying around my face, buzzing in my ear, and burning up my eye balls. Well, it gives me much joy to report that Ashlee Wilson-Hawn has left Atlanta. And my TV. While I'm sure this will be a short-lived triumph, I welcome the chance to spend more drama-free time with the other ladies of Big Rich Atlanta. 

To kick off this glorious Gnatlee-free episode, family friend Queen Evelyn helps Virginia Kolb, Harvin Eadon, and Meyer Eadon prep for the Gay Pride parade. Costumes are involved. Of course. "Costumes are everything to us," Meyer announces. "We would never go anywhere without costumes."

New addition to my bucket list: rock a costume and party with Virginia, Harvin, and Meyer at least once before I die. And, if I dare to be greedy, Bonnie Blossman and Whitney Whatley will be there as well. #diehappy

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Welcome to Ashlee Wilson-Hawn's fantasy world… where 911 handles hair extension emergencies and verbal bullying is passed off as harmless teasing…

POPULATION: ONE FAKE FRUIT CAKE

Do you see that look on Marcia Marchman's face? I imagine that's how I look while I'm watching Big Rich Atlanta. This show is honestly a nightmare to recap. The scenes do not flow, the editing is choppy, the personalities haven't been developed, the drama feels too forced, and the eye shadow gives me ulcers. 

Don't get me wrong, I think Big Rich Atlanta is a lot of fun to watch, but it doesn't even compare to Big Rich Texas (yet) for me. Obviously, I find the issues I listed above to be annoying; however, I also cannot relate to the socialite way of life and Ashlee Wilson-Hawn makes me want to vomit. The physical feeling that I get when Ashlee is on my TV is super serious.

Oh, speaking of things that are super serious, Marcia wants daughter Meagan McBrayer to treat their new business venture a little more seriously. Meagan tells Marcia that she is seriously sick of hearing about how serious creating a traveling fashion boutique is because she's a serious shopper and that makes her a serious business woman. I can't even begin to makes sense of that. I love them nonetheless. 

While Tweedlemom and Tweedledum are truck shopping, we learn Meagan seriously doesn't have any serious money to buy a truck. When Meagan asks her estranged dad to invest in her fashion truck business, he says no. I hope Meagan finds a way to make it happen. I want to see her further terrorize the streets and trees of Atlanta with her big truck.

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Big Rich Atlanta premiered last week – much to our horror (Ashlee Wilson-Hawn) and our amusement (Meyer Eadon) and our ozone layer's dismay (that big hair isn't standing on its own) – and it hasn't been canceled yet. Yay! 

This week's episode begins the morning after Ashlee's "hide your boyfriends, Meagan McBrayer, cause I'm divorced" party. It's 10 a.m. and Meyer and Harvin Eadon still aren't properly functioning. Harvin's sad attempt at being productive lands her right back in bed next to her sister. Their mama, Virginia Kolb, joyfully forces them to get up and start their work day. 

While Harvin and Meyer vodka caffeine up, Sabrina McKenzie and her daughter Anandi McKenzie and Katie Davidson and her daughter Diana Davidson make a deal with the devil Ashlee. Anandi and Diana express interest in competing in the next Miss Georgia Teen pageant, and Ashlee graciously gifts each girl a spot in her Boss Bitch Boot Camp. Yikes. Ashlee says it's six weeks of insanity, the girls promise they're up for the challenge, and Ashlee toasts to her newest victims Miss Georgias. 

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