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Timing is everything, right? Bachelor couple Ben Flajnik and Courtney Robertson break up, the two are thrust back into the media spotlight, and Ben announces a new TV project… coincidence or good planning? 

According to Wetpaint Entertainment, Ben and the E! network are teaming up to bring us a new reality series about Ben's Sonoma-based winery, Envolve. “It will be about the day-to-day business of the company,” Wetpaint's source said. “Both from the wine-making and the marketing angles."

The source added, "Right now, the show is in the very early stages.Contracts haven’t even been signed but things are moving along."

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It's going to be the most dramatic holiday season ever…I hope you read that in your best Chris Harrison voice!  Not only do we have dirt on tiny Bachelorette Ashley Hebert's wedding to J.P. Rosenbaum (anyone want to do an over-under?  I'm calling two years), but we have an inside look at newest Bachelor dud Sean Lowe's final four.  I'm starting to think that ABC is behind leaking some of this gossip so that the franchises will remain relevant.  After all, Courtney Robertson and Ben "Flannel" Flajnik's break-up isn't going to carry us through until 2013. 

Ashley and J.P. will be following in the footsteps of the original Bachelorette couple Trista and Ryan Sutter.  Not only are they getting married, but they're doing so in a two hour televised ABC special.  Is that part of their contract?  #rhetoricalquestions  Also, we have some spoilers, so if you don't want to skip ahead 9+ episode's of Sean's Bachelor season and make your own betting pools, consider yourself forewarned.

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I'm sure no one is surprised to learn that approximately five seconds after being dumped by Ben Flajnik, his ex-fiance unleashed the crazy that millions of viewers observed on The Bachelor

Courtney Robertson is not only reportedly writing a tell-all about her experiences on the show and with Ben, but she's been out and about complaining about him and slamming him left and right in the press. For all -2 of you who didn't think Courtney was a famewhore looking for her big ticket to stardom before this, her post-breakup behavior pretty much dispels any lingering myth.

In addition to all that nonsense, Courtney has taken a liking to hometown Phoenix-native and fellow Bachelor Nation alum, Arie Luyendyk Jr. Apparently Courtney's behavior has rubbed off on poor too cute for words Arie. 

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Like anyone actually thought Courtney Robertson from dull Ben Flajnik's season of the Bachelor would fade quietly into obscurity…

The Los Angeles based "model" is speaking out about her failed engagement to the wine making dud.  She blames the fantasy-like dates and sheltered existence during filming as part of the problem.  Wait, really?  So you're saying that falling in love in eight weeks while jet setting, swimming with dolphins, and private concerts isn't real life?  Wow.  Color me floored. 

No one really believes that Courtney would have fallen for Ben and his unfortunate hair and Oliver Twist-ish wardrobe in real life, right?  I have to say, I almost respect her more for kind of acknowledging that fact.

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Looks like a Bachelor / Bachelorette version of The Brady Bunch, doesn't it?  Well, except for the big red slash through Jef Holm's picture, I guess.

About that No Jef Holm picture… it seems as if someone took the time to create a "Jef Holm's Ex" Twitter page. She (we're guessing) claims to be "one of the many ex GFs of Mr. Bachelorette Jef Holm" and has made it her mission to "warn" the young girls of America that Jef isn't worth the "heartache." 

Honestly, this is why I love this job. I could not make up stuff like this. 

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Courtney Robertson and Shawntel Newton are two well-known, albeit very different, women to come out of the Bachelor madness. 

Their occupations and personalities:

Courtney is a model, mean girl, and villain. She cuts throats. Shawntel is a funeral director, quirky girl, and fan favorite. She embalms bodies.

Their Bachelor history:

Courtney "won" her season of the Bachelor. She just ended her engagement to her "prize" Ben FlajnikShawntel was rejected by Brad Womack. Later, she crashed Ben's season, but Courtney threatened to leave if Ben kept her. Shawntel was sent home by Ben. Shawntel just announced her engagement to a regular guy.

Their writing style:

Courtney plans to write a juicy tell-all book about her sorrid past relationships and Bachelor experience. Shawntel wrote a tasteful autobiography about her career and Bachelor experience.

Did you catch that? In an interview with Celebuzz, Courtney reveals she's writing a tell-all memoir. I know you're excited, but you cannot pre-order your very own copy yet… so please calm down.

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Can you believe it? Sean Lowe is already three quarters of the way to the Bachelor's most romantic final rose ceremony ever. ever. 

According to Chris Harrison, Sean's journey is going well and it seems as if Emily Maynard is a distant memory. "Sean's doing great and his choices and decisions so far have been really good," Chris told US Weekly. "He's looking for a lady: someone who respects herself and her family. It's not a crazy, 'let's get drunk, let's get naked' type of season because that's not Sean." 

That said, Chris promised, "He has his shirt off a lot." See photo evidence below. 

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I know you all still believe in the power of the Bachelor and Bachelorette franchise to find true love, given as it's happened so often!  There are countless examples of how couples have come together, forever, thanks to fairy tale romance, a booze-infused mansion, Chris Harrison, and no hint of the real world.  Works every time!

The most recent couple to find a match made in heaven is Emily Maynard and Jef Holm.  Oh, who am I kidding?  If they can't even bother to keep up the charade, why should I try?  These shows are ridiculous, yet I cannot turn away.  I am obsessed…and even though some insiders are spilling some of the shows' secrets (and by secrets, I mean exactly what you thought producers were doing behind the scenes), I will still be glued to my television when Emily looks for love for the ninth time.

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