Basketball Wives LA Recap

This November, I am thankful for Basketball Wives: LA.  Seriously.  They make me feel a wee bit better about my life.  I may not have money or reality fame, but at least I've got great friends and family and don't look like a fool week after week for the whole world to see.  That is definitely something for which to give thanks!

Once again, last night's episode was the Jackie Christie show, and I have to wonder why she doesn't just get a spin-off already!  Fortunately for the viewers, the ladies seem to have veered from their whole meet for lunch/drinks/dinner/canyon/walks/cat fights premise.  Sorry, I couldn't even type that with a straight face.  We begin with Jackie meeting Gloria Govan for lunch to discuss Laura Govan's recent behavior.  Jackie needs to get her personal life sorted out so the drama doesn't interfere with the most important thing in her life–her daugters New York Fashion Week.  I am still shocked that she has a show.  Are we sure this is New York City Fashion Week?  In Manhattan?  Perhaps it could be New York Missouri Proper Fashion Week?  Jackie reveals that Malaysia Pargo will be walking in her show, and she had planned to ask Draya Michele as well.  Gloria is confused.  Doesn't Jackie hate Draya?  Gloria is too involved in her webisodes.  Jackie decides to vent about Laura to her sister, and Gloria totally flakes.  Jackie knows Gloria is the mouthpiece for the group, but she hopes Gloria will be nice when she sees Jackie's clothing line.

Malaysia and Bambi are returning to volunteer with Educated Ballers.  They have two high school girls they are going to mentor.  Well, this is a refreshing change if we have to see a "meet up" with the women.  Malaysia wonders if the girls would like to work in fashion.  One girl would like to be a social worker while the other would like to work in a correctional facility.  They are going to be roommates when college starts in the fall.  I must say that both Bambi and Malaysia are good at talking to the girls without talking down to them.  Malaysia is inspired.  She wants their next vacation to be a volunteer endeavor, like building houses in New Orleans. 

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Last night’s Basketball Wives LA was no different from anything we’ve seen this season thus far.  I am just waiting (as I’m sure you are) for some kind of shocking revelation or a giant shoe to drop.  We all know Jackie Christie is going to continue to be the focus of the show.  Heck, even Laura Govan’s evil ways are starting to lose their drama.  What are we to do, VH1?

Laura is meeting Jackie’s daughter Chantel.  Chantel tells Laura that Jackie warned her about meeting with her given Jackie thinks Laura has bad intentions.  Chantel couldn’t care less.  She knows her mother is fame hungry and only cares about appearance.  Laura starts to regret her plan to intervene, but then she brings up Chantel’s sister as being too black.  Jackie tried to pit her daughters against one another.  Growing up, the girls couldn’t even speak because of the things that her mother instilled in them.  Chantel felt that she was the placed in a situation as a younger sister where she shouldn’t have been.  Laura is in over her head.  She just wanted beef against Jackie…she didn’t expect to get a horrid family situation like she did. 

Malaysia Pargo, Brooke Bailey, and Laura meet for froyo.  Laura and Malaysia share their trip to Seattle with Jackie.  Laura tells Brooke that Jackie was calling her oldest daughter too dark and overweight.  Malaysia revisits Brooke and Bambi’s rift and hopes that they can make amends at an upcoming 80’s roller skating event.

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Jackie Christie is starting to get wise to Laura Govan's evil ways!  Last night's Basketball Wives LA involved–you guessed it!–lots of meeting up for chit-chats and a certain lady at the center of all the drama.  I wonder who that could be!  Bambi, Laura, and Malaysia Pargo join Jackie on a trip to Seattle, while Draya Michele and Brooke Bailey try to keep their distance.

The show begins with Chantal and Takari being ambushed by the therapist.  Takari is in tears, and Chantal reminds her mother that while she provided everything for her girls, it was their grandmother who served as the mother figure.  Jackie doesn't want to hear any of it.  Chantal wants her mother to take responsibility for their past relationships, but Jackie is totally on the defensive.  She thinks her daughters are being mean and throwing false accusations at her.  The girls leave after Jackie refuses to shoulder any of the blame for their relationship troubles.  Doug tries to placate the girls in the driveway, but they are both over trying to make things work with someone who won't acknowledge any mistakes.  Back inside, Jackie apologizes to the therapist for having to listen to her disrespectful daughters spew lies.  The therapist is smart enough to know that she just needs to keep her mouth shut.  Could Jackie be any more delusional?

Brooke is waiting on Gloria Govan to meet her for lunch when she reads that Matt Barnes is in trouble with the law for his multiple traffic violations.  She calls Gloria who won't be able to make it to lunch…which I guess is a good thing given that there's a half-eaten pizza in front of Brooke.  She clearly wasn't waiting.

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Okay, I think the majority of us can agree that most of the reality shows we love tuning into need to clean house as far as the cast mates.  It's nice to think they may actually listen to the viewers when people tire of watching such toxic relationships (Real Housewives of New Jersey, anyone?).  However, when the producers clean house in what appears to be an attempt to gain more drama, I'm not on board.

What do I mean?  It seems that the folks at VH1 are getting rid of several ladies from Basketball Wives: LA while leaving the only two that despise each other in good standing with the show.  I don't know how much Shaunie O'Neal has to do with Los Angeles franchise (if any of y'all know, please enlighten me), but given her penchant for drama and cattiness (you need not look any further than the original Basketball Wives to know I'm right), this has her name written all over it.

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Meet up, talk about whatever happened in the last scene, lather, rinse, repeat.  Basketball Wives: LA is so predictable these days!  At least last night we had Jackie Christie's wedding and Laura Govan's weird fashion choices to keep us entertained!

Draya Michele and Malaysia Pargo are meeting up to discuss…well, Jackie.  It seems that she is the only topic anyone speaks about on this season!  Draya reveals that she will never be on board with a Jackie friendship and she is certainly not going to her eighty-eighth wedding.  Draya doesn't see Jackie's vow renewal at a gay club as a tribute to homosexuals.  She sees it as a slap in the face as the gay community is forced to watch a straight couple get married knowing that gay couples don't have the same rights.  Malaysia hadn't thought about it in those terms, and honestly, neither had I!  Brooke Bailey arrives dressed to the nines, and Malaysia tells the other women she really doesn't want to go to the wedding, and she feels like Jackie used her to get back into the group and then just dumped her.  She plans to pull Jackie aside at the rehearsal (they've done this forty-seven times…do they really need a practice round?) to share her feelings.  That should go over well!

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We resumed last night's Basketball Wives: LA with the altercation at Gloria Govan's going away party.  It's every bit as ridiculous and as anticlimactic as it was when it left off last week. 

Malaysia Pargo is holding back Draya Michele with the help of Brooke Bailey.  After Jackie Christie calls her a "ho" for the fiftieth time, Draya swings.  Even Malaysia can't believe how Jackie's acting.  Security pulls Jackie away while Laura Govan laughs about Draya trying to hit "auntie."  All of the girls find the scene hilarious except for Draya.  She's not proud that she let Jackie rile her up like she did.  Gloria urges her sister to go check on Jackie since they're "BFFs."  Laura does not like working this hard on a friendship! 

Jackie asks for Laura's honest opinion, but she won't really listen.  According to Jackie, Draya was ugly to her while she was trying to extend the olive branch.  Were we watching the same altercation?  Jackie claims her soul is hurt.  Laura can't help but feel sorry for her.  Thankfully, Jackie has found solace in her new biffle Bambi.  Poor Bambi doesn't know these women well enough to know she needs to be running as fast as she can in the opposite direction.  Bambi feeds Jackie's ego, and Jackie needs a giant groveling apology from Draya to even consider letting her back in her good graces.  Jackie threatens to take down Draya if that doesn't happen.  This dynamic between Bambi and Jackie seems so phony…at least on Jackie's part.

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After consistently losing viewers week after week, I'm here watching Basketball Wives L.A. so y'all can spend your hour doing something more productive…like napping.  :) 

Jackie Christie is beyond thrilled that Laura Govan is open to reconciling, and Jackie is telling Laura about her lunch meeting with Draya Michele.  She informs Laura that Draya stormed out of their meeting, and Laura is confused as to why Jackie even cares.  She feels Jackie is so desperate for friendship when she should just focus on people with whom she won't have issues.  Jackie doesn't quite detail the lunch in the way I remember, and she is quick to say that she wants to give Draya another chance.  Jackie isn't sure if she should invite Draya to her vow renewal since she didn't come last year.  Laura just can't believe that Jackie cares whether Draya comes or not, given the day is essentially about her and Doug.

Malaysia Pargo is styling in some giant glasses in her interview.  She meets with Gloria Govan to discuss the relationship with the Sisters Govan.  Gloria is sporting some oversize reading glasses as well.  Did these women develop vision problems in the last week?  It's like LensCrafters just blew up in here!  I do love that Malayasia has taken on the role of peacemaker this season.  She shares that Gloria has hurt Laura's feelings with her distance.  Gloria promises she'll talk to her sister, and she appreciate Malaysia being such a good friend to Laura.

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Another Monday night, another episode where people have nothing better to do than meet for a) cocktails; b) lunch; c) breakfast; d) dinner; or e) all of the above.  Are the VH1 producers actually asleep when they plan these episodes?  Have they just totally given up completely?  Oh well.  Last night's Basketball Wives LA was more of the same, beginning with Wacky Jackie Christie's attempt at a make-up party.

Draya Michele and Malaysia Pargo are the first ladies to arrive for the soiree.  Draya is a tad weirded out by the fact Jackie has framed pictures of the women all over the food table.  It looks like a very fancy deli section at your local Harris Teeter.  Take the stuff out of the plastic!  It doesn't have to be served on a silver platter, but no one wants to see how much you spend on that egg salad!  Laura Govan warily arrives second.  Draya accuses Jackie of not trusting her to speak with Gloria Govan and calling Gloria herself.  Gloria arrives with Brooke Bailey.  Jackie shares that Draya is upset with her for calling Gloria, to which Gloria responds, if it weren't for Draya explaining the situation, she would have never come to Jackie's. 

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