It’s time for Captain Lee‘s weekly crew member comments! The Valor captain breaks down each person’s performance on this week‘s Below Deck charter and, as always, he mixes sincere critique with some blunt advice.
On Jen‘s ridiculous antics, “You may not be the worst drunk person I’ve ever observed, but you are in the top 5 no doubt. You have a mean streak that really jumps out after a couple of pops. Kate was totally correct – had I witnessed your behavior, last charter or not, you would have been walking down the dock.”
Let’s see: Jen has generally sucked at her job, publicly called her boss, Kate Chastain, a whore, gotten sloppy drunk once, or twice, maybe thrice, entered the book of world records for slowest latte making, was sexually harassed, but NOT sexually satisfied as she so desperately wants – instead Yachterella constantly bemoaned that she never gets taken to any balling, luckily Jen also gave herself an orgasm over dinner! She’s also thrown her chief stew under the propellor to guests, fought with Brianna Adekeye, resurrected the Jan Brady hairstyle one flowby at a time, and most recently scratched Bruno Duarte. A small part of me feels like Jen and Tom Cruise are soulmates – now that she’s officially too slut shaming for Kyle Dixon.
It’s Jen Howell‘s world and we’re all just sailing through it! Or at least that’s what the worst stewardess in Below Deck history seems to believe!
Interactions between Jen and Kate Chastain are still strained after their ‘whore – no you’re the whore’ argument from last week. Jen doesn’t care though – she’s gonna be the best stew she can be (which means the worst stew Kate has ever seen) and she has a new ally in Kyle Dixon. Or so she thinks.
Unfortunately, reality TV shows do not bless us viewers with new episodes every single week. Thank god for social media to fill in the gaps between seasons or just to give the fans a glimpse of what was happening behind the scenes to provide us with some additional content. This week’s Instagram Roundup of reality star photos does not disappoint.
On last night’s Below Deck, we lost one crew member and gained another. Well, I use the word “gain” loosely, Jen Howell and Kate Chastain needed an HR rep to review sexual harassment policies. Support each other, ladies – no slutshaming aboard the 5-star Valor! And Nico Scholly made a miraculous recovery.
Poor Nico is in his bunk, all by himself, flexing his hand while tapping on his iPhone just waiting for Brianna Adekeye to check his temperature. Instead Jen and Bri are in hula gear at 1am, faced with a mountain of dishes that gives Jen delirium and psychosis. She’s talking more gibberish than usual, and she’s pretty sure that butter knife turned into a talking seahorse. What was IN that dinner Matt Burns made? It sure wasn’t happy juice!
Last night on Below Deck, Nico Scholly was out for the count and no one even noticed his absence. Of course mostly everyone else continued to suck.
In St. Martin’s, the wind is rough, making massive waves. Captain Lee Rosbach is worried Valor won’t be leaving the dock for their upcoming charter. Of course, this guarantees that they’ll have super annoying, constantly-unhappy guests bringing a new meaning to expression “rough seas ahead.” Thankfully, after fighting with EJ Jansen over filthy feet, Nico’s brother is gone and taking 1/2 the Scholly a-component with him. Nico temporarily remains, dirty feet and jerky attitude, though! He blames EJ for trying to bait his brother into a fight.
There’s no better way to start out your weekend than with the best reality star Instagram posts of the week. No need to scroll through your feed or type in all of the names that matter. I got you covered and there was a lot going on this week and this is aside from the Halloween festivities.
The entire Jersey Shore cast (minus one person) got together to celebrate Deena Cortese’s wedding, getting me all nostalgic. The Real Housewives of Dallas stars gathered with Andy Cohen to film the Season 2 reunion and posted a group photo to show off their glamorous ensembles (and spray tans…most likely). Dorinda Medley and Tinsley Mortimer went all out when they dressed up as famous pop stars for Halloween. The Vanderpump Rules cast were living it up with appearances at the World Series and an LA clothing store launch. The Southern Charm crew made it very clear that they are filming the next season because they were turning up all over Charleston doing shotskis, watching Monday Night Football, and attending restaurant openings.