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Brooks Ayers

I'm curious as to whether ladies in the housewives franchise ever just want to go back to a simpler, obscure neighborhood existence.  Most of them love to complain about how poorly they are portrayed on various seasons, yet they return for more toxic drama.

Of course, I'm not complaining.  Sometimes it's hilarious to watch grown women wearing skintight clothing and gaudy jewelry scream at each other and spew insults, and no one does it better than the original ladies of the O.C.  Real Housewives of Orange County has just started filming its eighth season, and rumor has it that the longest running housewife Vicki Gunvalson will be back!

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I know most people won't agree with me, but I like Heather Dubrow.  I daresay, she's my favorite of the ladies of Real Housewives of Orange County.  However, girlfriend needs to stop giving interviews that reference Alexis Bellino.  It's unbecoming.  This time around, she seems to be burying the hatchet, but still.  I can't wait until I can write about one of these women in one of the many franchises and actually use the phrase "took the high road."  A girl can dream, can't she?

This time around, Heather is discussing her time on the show, as well as her hesitation to join the cast.  She touches on the breakdown between Vicki Gunvalson and Tamra Barney's friendship and her disdain at the term "bullying" being thrown about in situations where it may not apply.  I'm not going to touch that comment with a ten-foot pole!

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Guess what guys?  Brooks Ayers is not a deadbeat dad.  I repeat, Brooks Ayers is not a deadbeat dad.  The love tank filler of Real Housewives of Orange County's Vicki Gunvalson wants to clear up some things for us.

If you recall, 20/20 did a report on Brooks where they claimed that he wasn't paying anything for his son with ex-girlfriend Nicolette Catanzarite and hadn't visited his son since he was 5 or 6 months old.  Furthermore, Nicolette claimed that she had no clue of Brooks' whereabouts until he showed up on RHOC!  Well, now the news program is setting the record straight thanks to ol' Brooks.

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While her emerging fan base will be sad to see her go, the trampoline dynasty will surely be thrilled to hear the latest Real Housewives of Orange County news!  Alexis Bellino has announced that she won't be returning next season…by her own choice.

Those last three words, for me, are hard to swallow, as I can't see Alexis, as nice and clueless as she may appear, stepping out of the limelight of her own accord.  In the past season, Alexis became the brunt of most of the ladies' drama, although she did kind of shoot herself in the foot by acting so pretentious and holier than thou.  But that's just me.  At least she has a bounce kingdom to oversee…it's the small things, right?

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It wouldn't be a mature adult relationship if it wasn't playing out dramatically over Twitter, right?  There is just something so sexy about a grown man who has nothing better to do with his time than to passive aggressively tweet about everything under the son.  Thank you, Brooks Ayers, for showing me exactly what I want in my dream guy!

Brooks, who has been dating Real Housewives of Orange County's Vicki Gunvalson, has recently had a lot to say in the Twitterverse.  I guess not working allows him that grand luxury.  I wonder what I would do if I didn't have to work.  Oh, I know!  I'd perfect my ability to engage with strange and often angry female fans of Bravo in 140 characters or less…

The comments that Brooks has been tweeting in the last week have many speculating whether he is still filling Vicki's love tank with daily affirmations.  The couple has met with a firestorm of criticism from fans, friends, and family alike, although both have put forth a united front.  However, maybe the major lack of support from family is finally wearing on the pair.  Vicki's daughter Briana Culberson has made no secret about her disdain for Brooks, who she believes in a con man.  Likewise, her husband Ryan isn't Brooks' biggest fan.  You all recall that Ryan called Brooks a "manipulative POS" last week on the social networking site.

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Vicki Gunvalson of the Real Housewives of Orange County is coming at us guns blazing.  As you would expect, she still hates former best friend Tamra Barney and she can't sing her beau Brooks Ayers' praises loud enough.  Where Gretchen Rossi and Slade Smiley are concerned, Vicki is always the victim as they continue to pick fights with her.  Is this high school?

Meanwhile, Vicki's daughter Briana Culberson and her husband Ryan are NOT singing Brooks' praises.  In fact, they are bashing him left and right in the Twitterverse…in between posts about how excited they are to welcome their son in the very near future.  It's all incredibly scandalous, and Briana isn't one to partake in drama so I'm inclined to believe what she is saying!

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Well, well… any interest in watching Vicki Gunvalson in her own show? She's hoping so. Vicki & Brooks: A Match Made In Prison? Affirmations In Orange County? For The Love Of Hallmark: The Vicki & Brooks Story. I'll Love You Even Though You're A Deadbeat: The Vicki Gunvalson Story? Or how about just: Vicki & Brooks: Love Tank Full? I Love Her Money: For The Love Of A Gigolo? Affairs Of The Greeting Card? Oh, I could go on all day, but unfortunately Vicki isn't interested in that kind of a spinoff. Danggit. 

No, actually Vicki is hoping to go more the Suze Orman route!

The Real Housewives of Orange County star reveals that after last season's horrendous turn of events she just isn't sure if she's willing to return and is focusing instead on developing her own show! “I don’t know yet if I’ll be back,” she dishes to Celebuzz. “We have to see what happens.” Doesn't she say this every season?

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Love is in the air for the peeps of the O.C.  Vicki Gunvalson is still head over stripper heels for the walking Hallmark card known as Brooks Ayers, and her Real Housewives of Orange County nemesis Gretchen Rossi is still gaga for househusband and whipping boy Slade Smiley.  Can I get a collective "awwwww…."? 

The relationships between the women certainly wasn't peachy keen this past season, but at least they all have full love tanks, right?  Excuse me while I gag.

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