‘Money Can’t Buy You Class’ – that’s certainly the case with Erika Girardi and Dorit Kemsley. There are some Real Housewives friendships I relish and delight in, and there are others, like these two, that fill you with a certain disingenuous dread (think Gretchen and Tamra). On last night’s Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills, Dorit crossed one friend to try and secure another. And the worst part – despite copious warnings, she seemed oblivious! Like when the signs read: “Don’t swim! Shark invested waters” yet you you dive right in.
Actually the worst part is that after all the bickering between herself, Lisa Vanderpump, and Kyle Richards they all managed to have a rip-roaring, super wedgie-tastic, twerking good time getting drunk and silly at Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave‘s beach house. It was the perfect way to bond these girls and put all the bad blood behind them, then DORIT ruined it all! Dorit and her mouth. Can someone stuff a designer sock in it? PeeeeeeeKaaaaaay?
Last night’s Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills led to yet another issue between Kyle Richards and Lisa Vanderpump about defining the boundaries of their friendship. I see both sides of this argument. I’d also like to remind them that in the middle of their bickering is a little follicle-ly unstable blonde woman named Dorit Kemsley, who cannot and will not stop talking shit about everyone she calls a friend.
Actually last night everyone (*except Dorit*) was more human. I credit Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave‘s influence. She’s chill, relaxed, absent of pretense, and despite being publicly scolded and denigrated over inappropriate stemware application, she STILL invited everyone to her ‘beach cottage’ for a potluck. Something about casseroles and dips puts everyone in a ‘let’s get real’ mood. Huddled around Teddi’s kitchen island, surrounded by pita chips served from Pottery Barn dishes, the women all showed their vulnerable and softer roots as opposed to their usual Febreezed exterior.
Ugh – it’s official, Dorit Kemsley is the one with multiple personalities, not Erika. It’s like Dorit’s evil doppelgänger does all these bad behaviors on Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills, then Dorit swoops in with a new hair style and a new accent to pretend she has “absolutely no idea” what anyone is talking about because she, a woman of impeccable etiquette, would never EVER call someone a C-word during dinner, or throw a fit over the wrong wine glass at a party, or be one hour late to a drinks meeting then lie about it.
No, she will throw Casino Royale parties where arrives via helicopter in designer gowns, waving to her people and smiling graciously. Dorit’s idealized self is not communicating with her actual self and we’re having problems here. Big time!
As much as Dorit Kemsley is annoying me this season on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (i.e. a whole lot), she is the only one giving us something to talk about every week. Sure, most of us are hating on Dorit for drunkenly calling Camille Grammer a “stupid c-nt,” but that’s a lot more interesting than watching gratuitous self promotion, home construction, and glam squads week after week.
Let’s hope that Luann de Lessepsdidn’t log into Instagram after she checked out of rehab earlier this week. She might feel a little bit slighted by her Real Housewives of New York costars. They did some sort of jail-themed workout class, complete with mock mugshots. Shade much? Or is it a merely a coincidence? I’m going to assume that it’s the former and just hope that this ends up contributing to a story line next season.
Aside from those glorious faux mugshots, there were some other great reality star photos for this week’s Instagram roundup.
At this point, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is shaping up to be Lisa Vanderpump vs. Lisa Rinna at the reunion. Sure, there are some other spats happening, but those are at the JV level. Lisa and Lisa have been taking jabs at each other in every single episode this season, in almost every interview they’ve done to promote the show, and in lots of their social media posts. These are varsity smack talkers.
Ever since the first season, Camille has been a total class act, but I was really hoping that season one Camille would be unleashed when Dorit Kemsley got wasted and called her a “stupid c-nt” in front Camille’s new man David C. Meyer. Camille shared her true feelings on Dorit, her theory about why Kelsey encouraged her to sign on for the show, and why she thinks the medium from season one predicted the end of her first marriage.
I’m having a total about face when it comes to Dorit Kemsley. Actually, given Dorit’s confusing hair and wardrobe this season of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills, I’d say she’s having a total about face about her own self! Something seems very off with her, and she’s driving everything to hell in a designer handbag!
Dorit lives in a fake prosperous world where she is your fun, eccentric friend doing zany but delightful things. The kind of friend who cosplays Erika Girardi (not Jayne!) and has NO idea how insanely insane she comes across. I think that instead I’ll just focus on Ken gently placing a newborn dog inside his shirt, kangaroo pouch-style, and softly holding it there until the puppy dozed off. It belongs on an Anne Geddes calendar, or in one of Lisa Rinna‘s bubbles of white light, because it was perfection.