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Carlton Gebbia

“The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” season 4 and “Vanderpump Rules” season 2 Cross-over premiere

I have to say that Carlton Gebbia's Bravo blog is the perfect storm of everything the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star likes to do: down tequila shots, hate on Kyle Richards, make digs at Joyce Giraud, and forge a better friendship with Lisa Vanderpump. I'm not always in Carlton's corner, but I do adore her take on Monday's episode. Besides calling out Mauricio Umansky and Michael Giraud for wanting to be the eighth and ninth housewives (preach!), she seems to have an even-keeled about her opinions…except when it comes to hating on Kyle, and that's pretty entertaining.

She begins, "Back to Puerto Rico…Kyle seems so hell bent on an apology from Lisa – for what? Is she seriously demanding this huge, blown-out-of-proportion apology from Lisa for allegedly saying 'take the tabloid' regarding Kyle's husbands alleged affair? Really, are you joking? Did you also demand that same apology from Brandi [Glanville] too? Just curious? Good God, give it a bloody rest."

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carlton gebbia

Carlton Gebbia was rushed to the hospital via ambulance last night after she got WASTED at dinner and passed out cold only 20 minutes in!! 

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star, whose job is already reportedly on the line, hosted a dinner at Mastro's Steakhouse for six of her girlfriends last night.  The ladies were downing shots of tequila and she passed out cold at the table! 

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Lisa Vanderpump leaves Villa Blanca

Leave it to Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Lisa Vanderpump to always come out ahead. She's #winning for sure when it comes to being targeted by former friends Brandi Glanville and Kyle Richards. Also, how did I not realize what a pot stirrer that Yolanda Foster is until lately? I'm behind the times apparently! So we have Lisa, turned on my her friends, with only scary Carlton Gebbia's shoulder on which to cry, and Joyce Giraud being the voice of reason and a new (to me at least…she used to bug!) breath of honesty. This show has done a complete one-eighty for me this season! 

In her Bravo blog, Lisa begins, "As we conclude this fiasco of a vacation (I use that word loosely), it brings it all back…I understand Joyce and Michael's comment saying that we should have answered. But, as Joyce now says when she sees the footage since she wasn't there, I answered on the beach–and that for most people would've been enough. So when I witness Yolanda stating I left because I didn't want to have that conversation…she was right. I knew what they were looking for. They were looking for blood. It is quite fascinating to see the two-faced conversations, full of animosity from people I believed to be friends, that led up to this. I hope they are proud of themselves and what they see. I wouldn't be–that's a certainty."

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rhobh-recap

Last night the ladies of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills ousted Lisa Vanderpump from Puerto Rico and bonded over how awesome it is to have the reigning queen off the island. Temporarily they're all getting along until the jockeying for position resumes anew. I think it's safe to say Kim Richards is out of the running. 

In Puerto Rico all the ladies meet for breakfast where Joyce Giraud has dressed in what is in her approximation casual pageant gear. Aka, a maxi dress with sparkles and spangles that weigh more than she does.

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STAR magazine's

What's one way to keep your name in the news when you're a former Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star? Well, just talk about how much you'd never return to the show (is Bravo asking? Doubtful.)…unless you got paid a lot of money. So you're saying there's a chance…

Adrienne Maloof is still taking to task the franchise that made her a Bravolebrity, while hinting that she wouldn't turn down the chance to return if the price was right. Maybe Bravo will decide to give her a wedding spin-off if she does, in fact, marry her child-groom. I'd watch. Not. 

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The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - Season 4

Oh man… there's nothing like a Real Housewives casting rumor! As each season ends the interwebs erupt with theories and reports about who is in and who is out. There's already a rumor that this is Kim Richards' final season and that seems pretty legit given that she's been a walking disaster seasons 1 – 4, but she's also reportedly one of Bravo's favorites, so… 

However Joyce Giraud and Snarlton Gebbia are also rumored to be saying goodbye to Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Bravo has been struggling to attract super-wealthy glamorous women for the past couple seasons, but they're also looking for ladies that amp the excitement factor. Apparently newbies Joyce and Carlton just aren't doing that. 

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Screen Shot 2014-02-24 at 10.39.30 PM

Last night on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills no one needed their sunglasses on the beaches of Puerto Rico, because it was shady allllll damn day and night. 

I don't know what to think. Is this a 4-way gang up on Lisa Vanderpump? Or is this Brandi Glanville and Yolanda Foster were once on a Dream Team with Lisa and for some odd reason decided to split and take Lisa down by pulling others into the middle? 

Meaning, that yes – Lisa was part of "tabloids-in-the-suitcase-gate" which is the new necklace-gate, which is the new-skipped-my-party-gate, which is the new stop-being-my-mama-gate which is the new ewww-get-my-husband's-mistress-out-my-plastic-face-gate, which is the new hair-flip-your-friends-talk-ish-about-you-gate, which is the new don't-talk-about-my-husband's-ALLEGED-cheating-gate. Basically we've come full circle and we're back to talking about Kyle Richards and Mauricio's cheating, which NO ONE – I repeat NO ONE – cared about in the first place except Kyle who probably planted the stories to begin with!

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joyce giraud

You know, with all the insanity that has surrounded the Great Skull and Crown Offering of 2014 courtesy of Kyle Richards, Carlton Gebbia, Brandi Glanville, and Lisa Vanderpump, it's really sad that necklace-gate has overshadowed the fact that Joyce Giraud lost her father. Not only was she going through a difficult time while filming, she has to relive it again as the series airs…while her friends consume their time with Wiccan-hating, TMJ, tacky jewelry, and larva cursed computers. Just a day in the life of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, I guess! 

Of course, Joyce is also giving us her take on Monday's episode. She begins her Bravo blog, "I want to thank you all for the cyber friendship and the support you've given me through this journey called Housewives. I also want to take advantage of this platform to answer something lots of you have been asking. For those who've asked me on social media how I feel about the fact that Brandi uses every chance she can to try to disrespect me, all I can say is that she is a classless person who thinks everything she says is OK and funny. Apparently she has no friends to tell her that making racial remarks, backstabbing all her fellow Housewives, making horrible remarks about other women (Joanna Krupa and Kenya Moore), and talking crap in all the interviews that are meant to be about her book are not OK…Sorry Brandi! Your card is overplayed and you have zero comedic timing! You are not funny and since I learned to take things from the source…Knock yourself out and keep proving me right."

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