On last night’s Real Housewives Of New York, the woes of thy vagina continued. Also Luann de Lesseps wonders why these bitches won’t be happy that she’s madly in love! It seems Luann answered her own question there, and the operative word is “bitches” – those bitches can’t be happy for her, because they’re bitches. OK, OK… that’s not entirely true, and more on this later… I know you cannot wait for my rambling musings on the many contrary behaviors of Housewives.
But first, Bethenny Frankel has taken a break from randomly bleeding all over Manhattan to launch Skinnygirl Chocolate. She decides to “go bold” by wearing a bright red wig, which considering what’s going on south of Bethenny’s equator, I dunno… maybe a little too close for comfort? Or maybe Bethenny wanted the drapes to match the curtains?
In the least mean way possible, I just don’t feel like Jules Wainstein is a fit for the reality TV life. It’s not that I dislike her when I watch Real Housewives of New York, but she just doesn’t really resonate with me. She does not really interact with any of the ladies on the show and whenever she does, she doesn’t say much to their face and then just complains about them in interviews or to Dorinda Medley.
Clearly, she is someone who avoids conflict, but that isn’t the best way to be if you want to be a reality star- or just a person in general. She sets no boundaries with these women, yet she complains every single time that she interacts with them. It makes no sense, but both she and Dorinda just think that she is getting bullied by the other Housewives like Carole Radziwill and Bethenny Frankel.
Andy plays a few clips of Jules Wainstein’s bizarre calzone creation, dubbing it “The Twilight CalZone”. He says that he thinks Jules meant it jokingly. Carole says, “Yeah, I think she thought it was going to be really funny. I don’t think putting Lidocaine, Percoset and all sorts of drugs into the calzone, I don’t think she thought that would be funny.”
Lu starts off, “I’ve been spending quite a bit of time with Tom in Palm Beach, so I threw a cocktail party for the girls at Hunt & Fish Club NYC so we could catch up. Bethenny and Carole didn’t even bother to RSVP so when Ramona pulled me aside to chastise me for not reaching out more to them, I had no choice but to defend myself. I’ve apologized more than enough to Carole, and she still is holding a grudge. At this point, I feel that I’ve extended an olive branch to her multiple times and she refuses to accept it. Carole now needs to meet me halfway for us to have any chance at being friends. Ultimately, I couldn’t care less whether Carole or Bethenny want my friendship because I’ve reached my limit, and I’m done apologizing.”
Other than the Bloody Vagina portions of the show, I loved last night’s Real Housewives Of New York. There was just the right mixture of drama and suspense, coupled with heart-felt friendship moments. WHAT WOULD RHONY DO WITHOUT DORINDA MEDLEY?! She is everyone’s friend in a meaningful way, never fake, and truly takes time to help these women without judgement. All Housewives shows need a Dorinda! In other happenings, Luann de Lesseps emancipated herself from trying to get into anyone’s good graces – she’s getting married and she don’t give a damn, so “F–k these bitches!” You heard it: Straight from the Countess’ mouth.
While Bethenny Frankel was preoccupied by bleeding about the groins, the other ladies were empowering their ovaries and realizing…screw this Bethenny Controlled Dictatorship – it’s mutiny time. Rise Up! They’ll go on their OWN trip. They’ll seize the sails and steer this ship in a new direction. The Countess went rogue and she don’t care about Carole RadziVille (said vaudville style).
On last night’s Real Housewives Of New York, the subject on everyone’s lips was blood and Luann de Lesseps. Does Luann have blood on her hands for ruining the group in her refusal to play the role of Bethenny Frankel‘s sycophant? Well, it appears none of that matters quite so much in the wake of Bethenny‘s health issue.
I don’t even think Luann made an appearance last night, but she was revived with her own ‘Before They Were Housewives’ special which aired after the show and my has she had quite a fascinating life.
Anyway, unfortunately, both Bethenny and Jules Wainstein spent their off-hours at Lenox Hill Hospital getting their vaginal areas investigated and mended. More on that later…
Oh Real Housewives Of New York – you never cease to amaze me. Last night’s episode shone a rather frantic light on the very temporary nature of life as a Housewife.
First up Sonja Morgan has an intern she believes is her twin. This intern has Sonja’s nose, butLuann de Lesseps‘ voice and it’s all together confusing. That poor girl – Alex – upon realizing her predicament was shocked. In Sonja’s kitchen Luann lectures her about making amends with Bethenny Frankel, but Sonja is not inclined. She’s not going to grovel at the feet of the self-proclaimed Queen B, who is schtupping other women’s husbands and channeling the burden of her hypocrisy by having hysterical projecting meltdowns on Luann. Or at least I think that’s what happened between Bethenny and Luann during the Berkshires Bonanza. Which sounds like a recipe. Maybe Adam and Carole Radziwill can put it in their cookbook?! I give it a “Radish Rating” of 9.