Reality TV is known for its sensational fashion – and I don't mean sensational in a good way! I mean like, 'dressing in the dark, I bought this on clearance at Forever 21, and oops my boobs fell out' fashions.
Below are some of my least favorite red carpet fashion moments. You have been warned – these are searing, unflattering, and really, really gobsmackingly ugly.
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Last night was the first segment of the Real Housewives of New York reunion. There was a definite divide between the demeanor of the veterans and the demeanor of the newbies last night. And by that, I mean the oldies came prepared to fight, get vicious, down and dirty while the newbies obviously didn't do their research and came prepared to recap the season and discuss.
Reunions are both my favorite shows to watch and my least favorite to recap. My favorite to watch because we get an unfiltered glimpse of the ladies, but they're a real beast to recap because the accusations are flying and the screaming is coming at you from all sides. Meanwhile I'm just trying to assess what everyone is wearing and who looks the worst. In the case of RHONY that award always, without fail, goes to Pinot Singer and last night was no exception.
I'm pretty sure the Project Runway "Unconventional Materials" challenge dress Pinot wore was constructed from old plastic bags on the top and my grandmother's living room sheers on the bottom. All dyed Crayola royal blue. Madame, you are in need of an intervention. Please refrain from drinking and dressing for the duration.
Both ladies attended the recent GLAAD Awards in NYC and rumor has it that Ramona tried to get Aviva banned. “Ramona tried to have [Aviva] banned from the event,” an insider told Gategrasher. “GLAAD doesn’t get involved in ‘Housewives’ drama and told Ramona that Aviva was welcome to attend.”
Apparently Ramona's outburst led the GLAAD organizers to have concern some concern so they sent Aviva an email to make sure she knew what was going on.
Aviva demonstrated that she could be the bigger person (must be that Vassar education!), replying: “This event is to support the LGBT community and has nothing to do with personal relationships. Ramona and I are on a television show and I’m sure she realizes that as well.”
Sometimes, I wish I could say that the housewives were seasonal…like the olden days TGIF on ABC. You have a season, you move on to reruns, lather, rinse, repeat. Of course, Bravo and Andy Cohen have made sure that there are housewives for the viewers all year long. No hiatus. No break. All housewives, all the time. I can complain about it knowing that I'd be even more upset if it wasn't this way.
So let's commence…the Real Housewives of New York had their finale this week, which means we are going to be subjected to reunion upon reunion (although not upon THIRD reunion, as they haven't quite reached RHONJ status yet). Let's check in with my beloved drama-free New York (non) Housewife to see what she has to say about her freshman season with the Cramona. Ladies and gentlemen, Carole Radziwill….
My new, most favorite housewife ever in the history of housewives, Carole is dishing on her first foray into the drama. Now I realize that not everyone is a Carole fan. To that, I say, WHY NOT!?!? She is drama-free, full of class, and calls it like she sees it. I could only wish more women in this franchise came from the Carole school of thought. Truth be told, I want her to put on a bra and be my best friend. And we so would be.
Last night was the season finale of Real Housewives of New York and as you well know by now Season Finale is a euphemism for fights, meltdowns, and histrionic antics.
Yep, surreptitious nonsense was the mantra last night as the ladies desperately tried to out-rude each other and deny any infractions once caught. Ok, so not everyone was an outright embarrassment to humanity, but at least three people were! Lets here if for LuAnn de Lesseps – our countess of redemption. She actually behaved semi-classy and um, like, normal-ish last night.
So Carole Radziwill, the le chillest Housewife ever is having some sort of charity ping pong party. Seriously – last night was just events cubed. It was events, events, events – and trips – that's all this whole season was. Which I guess is fine if that's how these women live their lives. It's certainly better than labor and delivery room footage, I suppose.
Carole invited everyone and she's hoping her culottes, borrowed from Lee Radziwill's 1956 summer camp closet, will scare everyone into behaving. It sort of worked – either that or everyone collectively and separately likes Carole enough to keep it in check – at least temporarily. Aviva Drescher arrives with an agenda. And that agenda was to talk about herself at length and dominate all conversations with a litany of complaints about Pinot Singer.
It seems like only yesterday that that the newly revamped Real Housewives of New York started. And now tonight is the season finale. Reflecting back on the season, I have to admit – I've really enjoyed it. Perhaps I am cross-referencing it to Jersey, but overall I like the new ladies and well, it's been nice to see less vitriol and more class. Well, at least a little teeny, wee bit more class.
In honor of tonight's final episode here's a list of the most memorable moments from this season!
Last night on Real Housewives of New York somebody got diarrhea! Isn't that a fantastically mature and classy storyline for a show supposedly about the upper-echelon of New York society. The thing about Housewives that happens is they burst onto the scene and present all these admonitions about how people should behave and why – meanwhile never quite behaving that way themselves. It's a curious phenomenon, one explored over and over again without pause.
Pinot Singer can't stop with her pinographies on how she's as lucid as the wine is white and the trash is not. And MevivaDrescher can't stop with her mespousing about how everyone is wrong and she is the definition of the right of the right. Unbutton your top button Meviva, have a glass of wine (a Xanax might put you over the edge) and accept that crazy can't even be managed by Nurse Ratchet and she had far sturdier shoes than you. Although, I'll hand it to Meviva – she put that education to good use and her lawyer-y skills were out and abundant over the tea that scalds and burns.
And in other news Aviva's father George returned. And yeah, please go back from whence you came.