Is it me or are things on Real Housewives Of New York just straight up mean this season?! If it isn’t raining men in NYC, it’s raining bitches – and everyone is getting drenched!
At least things start out positively. Moving into the fifth floor of Manor Morgan is Luann de Lesseps. The heater may not work but at least there’s a hot plate.
While Luann lounges on a bed still bearing the trappings of 1992 bourgeois stylings, she wonders if her hostess with the mostess loose ends, Sonja Morgan, has told Bethenny Frankel about the Tipsy Girl unveiling. Sonja shrugs off the potential snafu. She ain’t scairt of Bethenny. The well of booze has a deep trough, and Tipsy Girl is but a little drop, all of it likely going down Sonja’s gullet. After all, there was once a Skinny Bitch, then along came a Skinnygirl, and that little low-fat piggy went on reality TV and squealed all the way to the bank.
I have been watching the Real Housewives of New York from the very beginning, but I still find it so difficult to figure out where the relationships stand between the ladies. It is so hard to tell who is on good terms at any given moment. That coupled with the fact that watching a show about your clique is bound to resurface old feelings and a pretty vicious cycle is created.
Luann de Lesseps and Ramona Singer are original cast members on RHONY so I naively assume that they will always stick together, but I’m usually wrong about this. With that said, Luann has some pretty damning comments for her sometimes friend Ramona and Dorinda Medley‘s boyfriend John after watching the latest episode.
“They needed that,” the woman remarked calmly as Ramona and Dorinda held each other and cried after their blow-up. This woman needs to be making more appearances on Bravo.
However, we begin with psycho facialists. Sonja Morgan is getting human skin cells spread on her face, since placenta is too expensive to buy on the black market! Sonja needs to hook Yolanda up with Satoko!
Dorinda Medley began this season of The Real Housewives of New York in the hot seat, so she was relieved to be more of a bit part character last week. Calling her RHONY castmates “killer sharks,” Dorinda jokes that “the moment they stop moving, stop preying, stop stinging, they die.” So, who are they zeroed in on now? Newbie Jules Wainstein, of course!
Dorinda is relieved, but wary. “This week, it’s a relief to see there’s been a cosmic shift away from ME. I’m not in the crosshairs, but like I said last week, that means Jules is in the hot seat, and this one has been set to ROAST.” She adds, “So by now, you’ve seen that Jules is on the spit, getting turned very slowly.Sonja [Morgan’s] on the back burner, just at a simmer, with Luann de Lesseps on the counter, getting primped and prepped for her day in the sun. This is one kitchen I’m glad to be out of at this point.”
The standout moment from last night’s Real Housewives Of New York was that nearly every woman wore the exact same dress to Ramona Singer‘s birthday lunch. We’re no longer fighting for control of Ramona Blue, it is now Ramona Red!
Dorinda Medley meets Carole Radziwill for dumplings. Of course, the real reason for this feast is to discuss everything that went down in the Hamptons at Jules Wainstein‘s Joker’s Funhouse of Construction Deathtraps. Carole says it was an awkward vibe, but surprisingly admits that she and Bethenny Frankel behaved badly.
Suddenly, careening through the door in a gold leather jacket, like The Flash (if he lingered a whisper of pissiness and perfume), is Jules. She plops down – I never even had time to notice if she ate or not because she talked so much and so fast about the terrible impression Bethenny’s abrasiveness has given her.
But Jules has high praise for Countess Luanne deLesseps, who she deems to be “nothing but sweetness.” Oh, newbie housewife! Beware of first impressions…they evaporate quickly in the face of narcissism and delusion! Jules reflects on Bethenny’s “birthday tailgate” party first: “Here we are in the Hamptons, my home away from home. I ‘m loving that John and Dorinda [Medley] were with us that weekend, because we had such a great time having them; tons of fun, laughs, and an all-around good time as always. We are all here to celebrate Bethenny’s birthday on Saturday, a tailgate-themed party, and I always love a good festive theme. The party was very well done, every ‘I’ was dotted and every ‘T’ crossed, yet the energy was off.”
It’s very difficult for a Real Housewife to admit her mistakes and be accountable for her words and actions. Dorinda Medley is the exception to that norm. There might be other Real Housewives that do the same, but no one else consistently comes to mind in all honesty. But anyway, Dorinda put up her blog entry following the most recent Real Housewives of New York Cityepisode and she is saying what most of the viewers are thinking.
It really seems like Dorinda makes the effort to give an honest opinion no matter where her loyalties lie. She has no issue calling out her boyfriend for his mistakes, checking a close friend for her behavior, or even admitting if she does something wrong herself. Dorinda just wants to know why people can’t own what they do and just try to get along
CLICK “CONTINUE READING” TO SEE WHAT DORINDA WROTE IN HER BLOG
In a desperate attempt to make us appreciate her cleverness, the Real Housewives Of New York star bragged of her blog, “I slay like Beyonce! Who is your THN? #rhony” (Let’s hope that was sarcasm, cause um…. otherwise someone put batshit crazy in Carole’s lemonade.) Inviting viewers to name “‘The Housewife Narcissist’ in each city and win a prize!” resulted in Carole re-tweeting a list which included NeNe Leakes!