Aaaahhh… Real Housewives of New Jersey – just when I thought this season would never end and we'd be trapped in a labyrinth with Melissa Gorga popping up around random corners to sing at us and Teresa Giudice chasing us down calling us "prostitution whore!" comes word that the reunion for the eternal fourth season has filmed.
So there is light at the end of the tunnel. I won't be recapping RHONJ until the end of eternity. To quote a certain NJ lady, "Thank you Jesus!"
Yes, that's right this weekend the RHONJ reunion filmed to insane reviews. Just ask anyone who was there. Taking to twitter the cast reacted to what was surely a PTS inducing nightmare of screaming, accusations, hysteria, and one very afraid and powerless Andy Cohen shrieking randomly for people to shut-up. Oh, Andy… why you so useless?
Last Sunday's episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey continues to make waves for the cast. And it seems that while nobody likes Teresa Giudice, nobody can stop talking about her either. That must burn like vomit coming up.
First up, Caroline Manzo admits that after calling her former made-for-TV friend "ugly" and "psychotic" in a vitriolic episode that left me pining for the timid-by-comparison-scenes of The Exorcist, she hasn't spoke to Teresa in a year. Well, I'm sure the upcoming reunion will change all that!
“The only thing positive about it was I finally said what I needed to say and I’m done. And that was a year ago,” Caroline told Celebuzz about their altercation.
“And I have not seen or spoken to Teresa since the reunion last year with the exception of the Bravo commercial – I was in the same room with her. My last words to Teresa Giudice were at the reunion last year. And can I tell you, it’s been a wonderful year.”
Well, I see Caroline is still keeping it Giudice (i.e. bitter and grudge-holding).
Joe Giudice has been in trouble with the law for what seems like YEARS! The Real Housewies of New Jersey star recently rejected a plea bargain offered by New Jersey prosecutors in his identity fraud case, instead opting to go to trial and plead not-guilty.
Joe's trial date was initially set for October 1, 2012, but according to Chief Assistant Prosecutor Jay McCann it will likely be postponed until 2013.
“The chances of it going on that day are slim,” Mr. McCanntold Celebuzz. “We are going to have to get closer to the day to see if the judge will have time.”
“The court tries to give preference to cases for those who are incarcerated first,” he added. According to Mr. McCann it is likely that Joe will take the stand in his own defense and the trial will take place sometime before June 2013.
Now, believe me when I tell you, I think all of these ladies are a big ol' piece of work. Unless Teresa's involved, it usually takes two people to create drama and tension (I'm looking at you Manzo sisters!), and it is, in my experience, much easier to always turn the other cheek. When I was in college, my mother gave me the best advice when I was stuck in the throes of a manipulative friendship. She said, even if people don't realize it now, and even if it takes several years and you no longer care, crazy always catches up to crazy. She couldn't have been more right.
I generally like to keep my problems away from water, but I guess that’s not the case with the Real Housewives of New Jerseywho took their fighting to a Rock of Love level when things got dramatic in and around the hot tub of horrors. Sadly Bret Michaels did not arrive to bust into a hair metal anthem. #why? Luckily there were sequins. As one of our twitter followers pointed out, you can cut a bitch with a sequined bikini. Where do they buy these things?
So there they all were in some insanely hideous bikinis, hair and make-up done up to the nines, guzzling wine by the gallon, and shrieking at each other like mongooses so that it echoed through the vineyards of Napa and awoke a dreaming Vivendi Wine owner in his sleep. ‘Oh, no… ‘ he thought… ‘The meerkats have gotten into the grapes again.’ Nope, just some delusional women embarrassing themselves on national TV! Grapes are fine, viewers of RHONJ not so much! Pack your alibis and let’s go!
Our favorite reality TV stars can’t get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to Twitter to give us an hourly play-by-play of their lives. And we love them for it! Here’s a roundup of some of our favorite photos from the Twitterverse this week! Enjoy!
Above: Snooki is down to her “final days” of her pregnancy! She shared, “My family ❤”.
Ahhhh… New Jersey, where class goes to die. Oh, I joke! What I should say isReal Housewives of New Jersey– where class goes to die. So Chris Laurita tried to be all sophisticated-like and invite these imbeciles to a vineyard he is hoping to sign a business deal with. So, just read that sentence back to yourself again and then pause – no logic, right? Well, I guess he needed Bravo to expense his business trip.
This episode had a lot going on from friendship and family drama to marital discord, but the important thing, the crazy thing, the most ridiculous thing was Joe Giudice andAlbert Manzo‘s highly intense discussion about KFC. Was there or was there not a KFC on some street, in some random Jersey suburb?! There they are on a bus bitching about biscuits. This warrants a very terse and snippy discussion peppered with F-bombs and lots of ‘I ate extra crispy every day dammit, I know where the bleeping KFC is dumb a$$.’ “You’re a loser!” Albert yells. Yeah… grown men over there!