Watch out, world! Farrah Abraham is getting a spin-off! I know, I know…I probably won't watch it either! After (finally) saying farewell to the original train wrecks ladies of MTV's Teen Mom, it appears that at least one of them won't be fading into obscurity just yet.
On the heels of that news, it seems that the only sane couple to come out of this mess will finally be walking down the aisle, as Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra are finally planning that wedding. Sadly, they sound just a delusional as their counterparts when it comes to saying "I do."
Part two brings us the rest of the original cast. Well, almost. Amber Portwood is still at summer camp. <wink, wink>
Maci and Ryan… Sitting in a Tree…
Before Dr. Drew obsesses about Maci Bookout andRyan Edwards living happily ever after, heasks Maci about college. She says, "I'm doing good now. After my first two years, I just realized how fast it was going by. I stopped making excuses. Aside from Bentley, that should be the most important thing." Maci adds she is done wasting her time and money. Also, she travels at least once a week to speak to teens about teen pregnancy.
When Dr. Drew glosses over Amber's absence, I know that this was taped a while back. I mean, "legal and personal issues" and "voluntary five-year prison term" aren't even in the same ballpark. If the "reunion show" isn't going to be taped in real time, I think it's kind of pointless.
Before we get into the meat and potatoes of the reunion, ha, who am I kidding? It's Dr. Drew. Let me start again.
Before we get into the limp lettuce and soggy potatoes of the reunion, Dr. Drew reminds us what happened this season on Teen Mom, as if it isn't already permanently burned into our brains. (I'll show you my scar tissue, if you show me yours.) Alas, the highlights…
Amber and Gary Shirley fight. Amber enters rehab after she threatens suicide. Rehab takes away Amber's fake eyelashes and spray tan but not her drugs. Amber goes home. Amber and Gary fight. Gary gets sole custody of Leah.
Catelynn and Tyler buy pens and notebooks for college. I guess they finally figured out their major crisis.
Catelynn and Tyler visit April and ask her where she stands with Butch. April is torn. She knows she should probably divorce him… but she still loves him. Tyler completely understands. In other news, Catelynn looks beautiful. Her hair and makeup are perfect.
Tyler visits his mom. Kim shares that she is considering counseling. She’s feeling “held back” from seeing Carly. She says, “I knew Carly would go and live and out of state, but I thought they [Brandon and Theresa] would be more open to letting me go see her [Carly].” Kim says she’s running out of patience. I feel for Kim, but she does realize Brandon and Theresa aren’t babysitting Carly, right?
I always knew Catelynn Lowell was a stand-up girl, although it wouldn’t be hard to look like a gem given the shenanigans and drama of her Teen Mom counterparts. She and her boyfriend Tyler Baltierra made the difficult decision to choose adoption for their daughter, and they both seem to be on the right track…which can’t be easy given their addict parents who happen to be in an abusive relationship with each other. It’s super twisted.
Anyhoo, Catelynn has a six-year-old brother Nick, and she doesn’t want him growing up in the same environment she had as a small time. She’s even pledged to adopt her brother if her mom April Baltierra falls off the wagon again.
Catelynn and Tyler are supposedly preparing for college. The MTV timeline is confusing. Does the semester start, like, the next day? Hasn’t it been at least a week or two since Tyler pushed Catelynn to enroll because she was running out of time? This will be Catelynn’s first semester and Tyler’s second semester. Catelynn wants to be an adoption counselor and Tyler wants to be a youth counselor. Blah, blah, blah. We’ve heard all of this before.
Like always, Catelynn is thinking too far ahead and not worrying about the right now. Catelynn hopes to someday work with their own adoption counselor Dawn. Catelynn call Dawn to tell her the good news. Dawn thinks it’s a great idea, but kindly reminds Catelynn she needs to start with school.