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Colleen Fairman

We are now onto the 12th episode of the Real Housewives of New Jersey, and while it wasn’t as good as next week’s episode will be, it was still very interesting to say the least.

There are two angles one can go with in doing this recap. One is we finally get to meet Tom Staub, the man behind the legend, you know the man who decided Danielle Staub was fit to be his wife and the mother of his children. The other angle is Teresa Giudice of course, who was one of the most searched people on the internet yesterday thanks to the news of the impending public auction of her home items, and her thirst for diamonds, you know considering this episode was taped just a few weeks after she signed off on the bankruptcy documents. Oh what the hey, I say let’s go with both angles!

The episode starts off with some precious family time with the Giudices as they do monopoly night. When Joe wasn’t busy threatening to kick one of his daughters, Teresa decides to bring up their upcoming 10th anniversary. Teresa can’t believe she and Joe have been married for 10 years because “it feels like 5.” Teresa asks the kids for anniversary gift ideas and one of their daughters suggests chocolate and flowers, but bankrupt Teresa makes it clear that’s not good enough. Joe has an even better suggestion, when he jokingly suggests the $100 luxury tax ring, before retracting it, joking saying that he couldn’t even afford that. Must say the financial jokes by Joe are very telling. Notice how they seemed to start just a few episodes ago? Teresa however makes it clear there will be no hanky panky for one month if Joe doesn’t come through, and I can’t help but wonder if Teresa can even go a week with no hanky panky from Jiucy Joe.

Danielle decides to meet up with her friend/party planner to plan a party for herself her daughter Christine‘s sweet 16. Danielle then lets us know she plans to make this a memorable party for herself Christine because she never had a birthday party “thrown to” her until she was 47-years-old. Really Danielle? Not even a party at 1? 10? 16? 18? 21? 30? 40? 45? Well since Danielle is not known to ever lie or exaggerate, I will go ahead and take her word for this.

Christine reveals her idea to donate all proceeds from her party to a charity and Dirty D decides this is a perfect moment to take credit for Christine’s idea because that’s her daughter and she gave birth to her. And I take a moment to ponder how Danielle’s daughters seem to have turned out amazing and well grounded in spite of their mother. Danielle asks Christine if she wants to invite her father and Christine answers yes. Danielle then lets us know that Tom hasn’t been the best father in the world to his daughters, and I can’t help but wonder if Danielle is being truthful about this, or just trying to paint her ex in a bad light out of vengeance, not that this is Danielle’s MO or anything.

Jacqueline and Caroline meet up and yet again Caroline is making perfect sense when she advises Jacqueline to distance herself from the three-faced Kim G. and focus on her daughter.

The Giudices and the Lauritas have a get together during which Joe, who looks rather stressed, ponders what to get his wife for their upcoming 10th anniversary. Joe mentions the 10-year gift has to be a “big one,” bankruptcy be damned. Teresa, who just signed off on bankruptcy papers to the debt of $11 mil a few weeks earlier, is then shown having a conversation with Jacqueline. “I love diamonds, diamonds and diamonds and diamonds,” says the bankrupt Teresa when asked what she wants for her anniversary by Jacqueline. And how genius are the show’s editors for choosing the oh so perfect background music for this ridiculous scene.

And it’s now that time of the show, when we get to see the hotness known as Albie Manzo. This time around, Albie is sporting a buzz cut, which might or might not be slightly taking away from his hotness, and we find out Albie has joined the police academy while waiting to get into a new law school. Must say it’s nice to see a Manzo with ambitions that go beyond the Brownstone.

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