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Courtland Rogers

 
To be completely honest, I started this article about Jenelle Evans and Courtland Rogers yesterday afternoon. But when I heard about the school shooting in Newtown, CT, I had to walk away from it. 
 
I couldn't bring myself to poke fun at Jenelle's one-stop courthouse shopping. Or care about the most recent developments in her life, such as her failure to get a prenup before her quickie wedding. I just did. not. care. and I hated her for having a child she (seemingly) does not appreciate. I chose to watch the news coverage on CNN instead.
 
That said, I'm not ashamed to admit that I've always had a soft spot for Jenelle. Her story is truly the ONLY reason I watch Teen Mom 2. I get Jenelle's never-ending desire to feel loved, I think Barbara is (unintentionally) hilarious, and Jace is super cute.
 
Yes, Jenelle is currently a complete mess, but I feel as if she's the only star of Teen Mom 2 who has it in her (albeit way deep down) to change for the better. Before you call me nuts, let me explain. 
 
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Jenelle Evans is a human trainwreck of Lohan proportions that I really wish would fade into obscurity until she cleans up her act. And oh her poor son.

In the latest travail to plague the Teen Mom 2 star she married an ex-con in a quickie ceremony and may or may not be in the throes of a serious drug addiction. 

Jenelle married new husband Courtland Rogers the very same day he was charged with a felony for obtaining property by false pretenses. So just what did he do? It's really stupid… 

Courtland is accused of taking a gift card back to a store and attempting cash it in, but according to the store the gift card was never purchased so that raised a red flag,” a source tells RadarOnline. 

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Before I finish writing one story about Teen Mom 2's Jenelle Evans, 12 more crop up.  It's a never-ending battle to see how many words per minute I can type without spraining a pinky.  Or a middle finger. 

Let's start off first with the events of yesterday morning.  No, I don't mean the release of Ke$ha's new album, y'all!  I'm talking about the day that will now be known as the wedding anniversary of Jenelle Evans' first marriage.  Yesterday when Jenelle and Courtland secretly said their "I Do's", they first had to stop by different court room, where Courtland was charged with a felony! 

A Radar source shared, "Courtland Rogers was charged with a felony in North Carolina on Tuesday for obtaining property by false pretenses. Straight after that court hearing was finished Jenelle and Courtland got married at the magistrate's office."

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Some might say it's the end of an era.  I'd say that.  RIP camo hat.  I guess much like Leah Messer being replaced in Corey Simms' life of wedded bliss, his hat must also be replaced.  In this case, he has replaced both Leah and the hat with a more conservative, less redneck version…although if you look closely at both the new fiance and Leah and camo hat and new hat, they all are pretty interchangeable, right down to the bleached hair, fake nails, and super curved bill. 

Likewise, just how everything in Corey's world will always follow a simpler, flame-emblazoned truck story line, Jenelle Evans also likes to follow a script…and not one from the local pharmacy (that we know of, although I'm sure she wouldn't turn down any Rx painkillers).  It's a Teen Mom 2 post of stuff that won't surprise you in the least!

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Well that was FAST!  After like 12 minutes of dating a 14 day engagement, Teen Mom 2 star Jenelle Evans and Courtland Rogers got married this morning!  Coincidentally, Ke$ha dropped her new album today!  Oh the devotion Jenelle has for Ke$ha knows no bounds.

Jenelle's sister Ashleigh ran to the tabloids the minute she found out the news.  It's apparent that these two are still not on good terms. 

"My sister got married this morning, it was a shotgun courthouse wedding."  Um, not sure if Ashleigh really gets what the term "shotgun" means since Jenelle says she is definitely NOT pregnant.   Jenelle hasn't "confirmed" the wedding, but she did share on Twitter that she's not preggers again.  "NOOO I'm not and Courtland did not say anything about getting me pregnant or having kids anytime soon. Over my dead body if I would be that selfish to have a baby before getting Jace back."

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With Thanksgiving just two days away, I must give thanks for the  technology that allows me a live stream of Jenelle Evans and Courtland Rogers watching Teen Mom 2. Amazing, right? Before last night's UStream event, Jenelle tweeted, "Courtland gave me a HUGE surprise today. I'm so in love and you will see the surprise on UStream!!"

After listening to Jenelle and Courtland discuss last night's Teen Mom 2 for what felt like eons, Jenelle announced that she and Courtland are engaged! She added, “I’m not pregnant, but there is a reason behind why he got engaged to me. If you knew the reason, you would understand why we are taking this step. I hope you guys are happy for us.”

Last Wednesday, Jenelle sent out a twitpic that sparked engagement rumors. The backstory… Jenelle and Courtland went to the mall. While Jenelle ate her lunch and stressed that her missing-at-the-mall boyfriend was cheating on her, Courtland secretly bought several carats of diamonds. Needless to say, all cheating worries were forgotten when Courltand surprised Jenelle with the rings. Jenelle tweeted a picture of the rings, explaining that they were "just you're my girlfriend" rings. Less than a week later, there's a new ring and an official engagement. 

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First comes marriage baby, then comes baby engagements, then comes college rehab, then comes messy breakups, then comes "just friends" diamond rings. Jenelle Evans! What are we going to do with you?

Jenelle's whirlwind romance with Courtland Rogers began around October 6. Jenelle made it Twitter official, when she tweeted @Courtland, "You will always be my boo!" The love birds moved in together after only two weeks, but they broke up before Jenelle finished unpacking her Uggs. Seconds later, Jenelle had a change of heart, remembering that Courtland is her boo!

Since then, Jenelle has been too busy promoting Teen Mom 2 and sharing kiss-y face and new house twitpics to create too much drama. UNTIL TODAY.

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Apparently, the stars of Teen Mom want to accomplish as much as they can before they're of legal drinking age. One Teen Mom 2 star will have three college degrees babies before 21, one Teen Mom star has undergone three plastic surgeries, and one Teen Mom 2 star has logged three (to the tenth power) acts of volunteerism breakups and reconciliations before 21.

First, Leah (Messer) Calvert announced yesterday that she is pregnant again. According to US Weekly, Leah and Jeremy Calvert's baby will join their family this winter. This is Leah's third pregnancy. Leah suffered a miscarriage earlier this year. In 2009, Leah had twins, Ali and Aleeah, with her first husband, Corey Simms.

Leah confirmed the US Weekly story via facebook and tweeted:

"THANKS SOOO MUCH EVERYONE! #PositiveTweets makes this momma soooo happy!!! @Calvert505 are in such a good place! :) Love all of you!" 

"Being a teen mom was difficult, but I'm older and in a different place now — married to Jeremy and excited for our family to grow," Leah said. "We feel incredibly blessed and look forward to this next chapter in our lives." Oh, Leah, why the rush? You might be "older" but you are still only 20. :(

Next, this week's In Touch cover revealed (more) plastic surgery for a different Teen Mom star.

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