“Man is made of such a seemly shape, that friend or foe is not discerned by face; then hard it is the wickeds’ wiles to scape, since that the bad to mask with honest grace.” – Geoffrey Whitney
Amber continued, “If Whitney could reach into my soul and pull out exactly what is there, he would have used these words. I don’t know who to trust – who is my friend, who is my enemy, what are everyone’s intentions? This is a truly awful feeling that, clearly, many have felt throughout history based on so many literary works on the subject. What is the driving force behind our actions? How do we come to our perceptions of situations? It all can be profoundly attributed to the interactions between genetics, social factors, and environment. We take from our experience good attributes as well as negative attributes such as, weakness, insecurity, jealous, hatred, and even a lack of empathy.”
Teresa hasn’t blogged lately… but she has a few things to say this week!
“This blog is way overdue and only because of one reason. I have been totally disgusted with what Victoria, Teresa Giudice, and Amber have brought to this show,” said Teresa. “That repulsive episode of lies brought my parents, my son, and my nephews a lot of pain. And it did not stop there. Jim Marchese took it further and continued to spew these lies all over the media. What kind of a man would go after mothers and children?”
Still, Melissa took to her blog to share her thoughts on the episode, starting with the 9,000-square-foot home Joe Gorga plans to build. “A Joe Gorga house is impeccable,” Joe said on RHONJ. “When you open up those history books and you look in Rome, that’s what I build. I just have that gift. I’m the Michelangelo of New Jersey of building homes.” History books? I think he meant Beaver Habitats For Dummies.
“This week’s show really made me cry,” shared Dina. “I miss Luke so much, he left early in the season, so I think that’s why I look stressed and tired a lot too!”
Dina continued, “Luke was like my personal jester, no matter what was going on he could always make me laugh. He is truly a son to me and a brother to Lexi and I am hoping he finds what he is looking for back home. If nothing else I’m sure his mom is so happy to have her little boy back on her side of the pond, and like I said, my door will always be open to him (and any other stray that needs a home)!” Well, that explains the tacky hat, it must have been a stray.
Then Teresa and Gia have a heart-to-heart about Teresa’s life. Poor Gia – always the counselor, never the child. Teresa needs to remember Gia isn’t her peer. After Gia gets dropped off (I hope Teresa dropped her off at school and not at the Fashion Design business where she used to work (#DontTellMomTheBabySittersDead. #InsideJoke #GetIt #90s). And then Teresa tells Audriana, aged 4, how nice and amazing and smart, and a good listener her mom Gia is. Teresa is so glad they’re friends!
Since Amber has had The Cancer she’s become The Religious, and now considers herself the Mother Teresa in drag makeup of RHONJ. She and Jim go to church on Ash Wednesday and all of the sudden she receives The Vision and has to run outside to call Teresa. Right. Now. to check in on her. Teresa is in the gym and doesn’t want to tawk. She certainly doesn’t want to tawk about her legal issues but Amber’s questions are more probing than Rino’s prostate exam (see below!).
After praying to God, Teresa Giudice put on her best purple fur coat, forced husband Joe to color-coordinate in a show of solidarity and admitted that you know, maaaaaaaybe, ok posssssssilby, well actually definitely she bought too many sequined bikinis with money illegally obtained. But it’s like Oops – lots of people do this – lots of people commit mortgage fraud so they can have big fancy re-done house showy-offy parties for houses they can’t afford, so why is this happening to her?! WHY?! Why is the government making Gia cry by demanding her parents go to court and possibly jail. Like UGH. But Teresa being Teresa, she just buries her head in a vat of sequins and covers her eyes with her hairline, and drinks another glass of Fabellini.
With all of that said and done, Melissa Gorga and Dina Manzo feel sorry for Teresa that she’s under so much stress so they decide to plan a vacation to Florida. Like hey, you broke the law – let’s celebrate!
To start, Dina talked Project Ladybug and Childhood Cancer Awareness month.
“PERFECT TIMING! I love how this episode has a Project Ladybug focus. Did you know that September is Childhood Cancer awareness month? Yeah, not many people know that, for some CRAZY reason it’s not as prevalent as other awareness months,” shared Dina. “I need a favor, whoever is reading this, if you can post that on your social media sites, I’ll love you forever.”
Labor Day marks the unofficial end of summer – and the Real Housewives took to social media to show off how they spent the holiday weekend.
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Brandi Glanville took her two boys, Mason and Jake, to Palm Springs, and then she proceeded to complain about the amount of kids – “It’s noon. It’s time for wine. Kids. Everywhere.” – and the oppressive heat – “117 degrees!”
“Loving Palm Springs,” added Brandi. “I’ve been asked so many times where my boyfriend is but the truth is I just wanted face time with Mason and Jake.”