Uh oh. Poor Real Housewives of Miami newbie. I love the totally plastic Lisa Hochstein, but she's going to have Alex McCord and Simon van Kempen after her screaming trademark infringement….mainly because they have nothing better to do and desperately need to remain relevant. I kid, I kid. If anything, Lisa is boosting Silex's t-shirt sales. The uber-enhanced housewife is sharing her insight on the most recent episode of RHOM, and I have to say, it's both spot on and hilarious. It's why I adore Lisa–at first glance, you expect nothing under those injections but a ditzy airhead, but she's actually extremely down-to-earth and objective (except when she's bathing her dogs, of course).
Taking to her Bravo blog, Lisa dishes on the fashion show drama that had Marysol Patton literally running away from the teetering and towering drag queen Elaine Lancaster. Stealing the words right out of Silex's mouth, Lisa writes, “It was the wrong time, wrong place, wrong attitude. She looked like a thug in a cocktail dress," adding, “I understand Elaine was angry, but the pointing, tone of voice and chasing made the guests uncomfortable. Although Elaine is dressed as a woman, she/he is still a man.”
she he is…and a hot mess at that!
[Photo Credit: Bravo]
I think we all learned a good lesson on Real Housewives of Miami last night. Thomas Kramer's house is no place for Housewives of any strife, location, or wig-wearing persuasion.
The creepy, weird older guy who hosted the ladies of Atlanta on an unforgettable girls weekend two seasons ago, once again did Housewives no favors by hosting the ladies of Miami for an atrocious dinner party where the lest desirable thing at the table was Thomas himself. Look dude, if you think telling an 80-year-old woman to sit down and shut-up because she's nearing her expiration date is going to get you a reality show, you're mistaken.
Things begin at Lea Black's house with Mama Elsa and a case of missing mozzarella. Apparently Mama Elsa wants Lea and Marysol Patton to make up, but Lea has a conflict of interest – or two. One of them is 8 foot tall drag queen in a 40" wide wig named Elaine Lancaster. And the other is that essentially that The Patton Group screwed up The Black Gala two years in a row and there was nary an apology in sight.
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This week I had the opportunity to speak with Real Housewives of Miami extra and best friend of Lea Black, the formidable Elaine Lancaster (aka James). James has been a drama-starter all season and we've seen him get into scuffles over issues with Marysol Patton and Mama Elsa.
Speaking with James he gave me his perspective on the situation with Marysol and how he believes their feud started. Now, bear in mind this is James' perspective.
James calls the show a "wonderful experience that has been very cathartic in a lot of ways." James says his issues with Marysol started a "couple of years ago."
He says their relationship was always casual. "We have a lot of the same acquaintances; people that I socialize with on a regular basis," he says and they often saw each other at social events.
James said he always felt Marysol had a "problem" with him, but he's not sure why. He thinks it has something to do with jealousy over him being a "bright light" and charismatic presence on the Miami social scene.
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Not so great ratings and negative reviews in tow, the show must go on, and it did last night as Bravo aired the second episode of the Real Housewives of Miami.
While episode 2 didn’t seem to help matters that much, a single phone call via Lea Black on Watch What Happens Live last night did seem to bring some glimmer of hope. Perhaps this season won’t be all that bad after all. More on this later.
The episode begins with Adriana having a convo with fiance Frederic as the two have a surprisingly not awkward conversation about Adriana and her love for guys. The topic then turns to the catwalk drama involving the other ladies. Adriana gets it right when she refers to Larsa and Cristy as high school “mean girls” in her interview, but gets it wrong when she states she did not make a fool of herself on the catwalk.
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Weeks after bumping the Real Housewives of NYC, Bravo premiered the Real Housewives of Miami last night and so far, the reviews today have pretty much panned the show, but more on this later. The Miami franchise definitely felt like a mix between Basketball Wives and the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Is this a good mix you ask? Well, let’s find out!
On to the recap – the premiere episodes of the Bravo housewives are usually a bit ADD and all over the place but something about the RHMIA just seemed slightly more all over the place.
In the first scene, we are introduced to snob #1 Lea, a “people collector” who finds joy in collecting crazy people, as I breathe a sigh of relief that Lea wasn’t around pre-Lincoln days. Some of the people collected by Lea include rapper Rick Ross and former NBA hot mess star Dennis Rodman. In this scene, we also get a glimpse of drag queen Elaine Lancaster in the background. Elaine was rumored to have been a cast member back when the show was still titled ‘Miami Social Club.’ It will be interesting to see if Elaine is in a lot of scenes through out the season. So okay, not a big fan of Lea but what the hey! There are 5 more ladies left so let’s go!
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Following a sneak peek on Sunday night, the Real Housewives of Miami officially premieres tonight on the Bravo network!
On the premiere episode tonight titled ‘Paradise Cost,’ the RHMIA ladies are ready to bring the heat, starting with back stabbing and trash talk right from the get go. Adriana is off to a bad start when the ladies make fun of her during a fake strut down the catwalk, and things aren’t much better for some of the housewives at what should be a fun cooking party.
The Real Housewives of Miami debuts at 10/9c on Bravo.
Watch What Happens Live – Joining Andy Cohen in the Bravo clubhouse tonight will be Miami housewives Alexia, Lea and Adriana plus Andy promises a “special surprise.”
Meanwhile, some of the Miami housewives are speaking out in a new interview and the big question was are they worried about “editing?” That answer is no according to Lea Black. “I think you have to give people the material,” said Lea. “And if they edit you … I mean, as long as it’s in context, I don’t think you can blame anyone but yourself.”
Lea, a Miami socialite married to criminal defense attorney Roy Black goes on to add, “No one can force you to say things that you say. Now if you’re making a joke and you’re saying something and it’s taking it out of context and put into a mean spirit then I might have an issue about the editing.”
Meanwhile, Alexia Echevarria reveals they haven’t seen the final cut of the show yet, telling reporters “it’s been a while, it’s been almost a year since we filmed but – so it’s going to be interesting.”
A preview clip of tonight’s episode is below –
TELL US – WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON THE PREVIEW & TONIGHT’S DEBUT EPISODE?