In today’s installment of ’50 Ways To Go Insane’, listening to Farrah Abraham‘s voice for an hour is at the tippity-top of my list. Luckily for all of you lovely people, I took one for the team and listened to Farrah’s interview with the ‘Allegedly‘ podcast and I wrote down all the juicy bits. So while I’m icing my brain in a vat of vodka, all of you, please – read-on. Really – you owe it to me…
Farrah discussed everything from love, motherhood, God, politics, her success, and what’s next in her oh-so busy life.
“I’m not a thirsty bitch! I have plenty of H20,” declares Farrah. “I know how to give passion more unto the universe and I think it lacks it so much that I wouldn’t be happy if I didn’t improve where I was. That’s the kinda soul that I got.”
The Teen Mom OG star dished that she’s been offered as much as $20,000 for the real-in the flesh usage of her coochie molds! (WHO are these people and what have they done with their brains?). Maybe this is Farrah‘s backdoorbackup plan?
Farrah Abraham has come forward as the ninth woman to accuse James Deen of sexual assault. As you’ll recall, the Teen Mom star made a “sex tape” with porn star James Deen in 2013. Farrah insisted that she and James were dating at the time (he said nope) and that the sex tape, now known as Farrah Superstar: Backdoor Teen Mom, was meant to be for her eyes only (he said nope). Farrah sold the video to Vivid.
A year later, Farrah claimed she had been drugged and raped. It was assumed at the time that she meant while promoting her sex tape at porn conventions, however, Farrah came forward yesterday to say that it was actually James who drugged and raped her.
“James Deen raped me for his benefit of fame,” Farrah told Daily Mail. “He conspired against me with others that I thought were my friends at the time and that was very hurtful. I let it all go and I wanted to move on; due to the public and others in the media believing an abusive womanizer, sex addict, disgusting, unprofessional, adult entertainer’s lies.”
If you’ve been waiting for the perfect time to buy your very own piece of Farrah Abraham‘s DNA – aren’t we all? – today is it. Reason #1 – It’s on sale. You can own a piece of Farrah for only $49.99. Believe it or not the regular price is $99. Reason #2 – Farrah has been fired by the company that sells the DNA, so she won’t get any money.
“I would like to use this platform and DNA-based jewelry item to raise money for Operation Underground Railroad,” said Farrah. “Giving hope and knowledge can create change through DNA. When my daughter Sophia had to get a DNA test it changed her life and created a better future for her. I hope my legacy can change the world for the younger generation and save them from sex trafficking for a brighter future.”
It’s been a long time since we’ve heard from our good friend Farrah Abraham. But there have been two rumors about her circulating recently and we felt the need to update you, her fans. HA. I’m just kidding. Farrah’s only fan is Farrah. Um, and maybe Teen Mom 2 stalker Adam Lind, which brings me to the first rumor. Brace yourselves. It’s a doozy.
Rumor #1 – Adam wants to break into the porn industry, and he thinks the easiest way to shoot to super-porn-stardom is to make a tape with Farrah, the backdoor to endless possibilities.
“Adam is eager to get into the porn world and thinks that Farrah would make the perfect partner,” claimed a totally reliable source. #sarcasm “Adam loves what Farrah has done with her Teen Mom career. He thinks they could really rake in a lot of money since they’re both celebrities.” HAHAHAHA <celebrities> HAHAHA <can’t breathe> HAHAHAHA
Today, Farrah tells us why she outshines all other porn stars, forgets a major detail about the main character in her erotic trilogy, and gives us a glimpse of what to expect from book one, Celebrity Sex Tape: In The Making.
Farrah hates being called a porn star – poor thing – so she feels the need to explain to us regular folk the difference between a sex tape and a porn. "I think people purposely don't know how to separate a celebrity sex tape and a regular porn. I mean, I have wonderful friends who are in the adult industry. They make porn for a living – that is what they always do. Like, payment is different. Like, living your life is different. Taking care of yourself. Everything is different."
So, I think we can all agree that nothing says Happy Friday to my Reality Tea friends like a Farrah Abraham post with a huge close-up picture, right?
The Couples Therapy singleton gave two in-depth interviews recently, one to Starcasm and one to THZ, but I pulled only the best quotes from each to spare you repetition. Not to mention a Farrah induced coma.
Farrah celebrated her 23rd birthday last week. How does she feel about that?
"I feel like it is the right age to be, which is good to say, because sometimes I’m like ‘Ugh my life’ and I’m trying to handle everything fame has gotten me," said Farrah. "I’m 23 – and it feels right!" Raise your hand if you're already lost. 🙂
So, today's good news is, Farrah has more to say about her book and life. The bad news is that I have pictures from Farrah's 23rd birthday party too!
Why did Farrah decide to write an erotic trilogy? "The whole sex symbol – that hype – and I'm single and 23, I felt now is the proper time for me to write about some fantasies and some great things that luckily I turned into a positive." Why I love Farrah so much – she never fails to turn "great" things into "positives".