Mama June has officially arrived as a reality star, y'all! The Here Comes Honey Boo Boo matriarch is releasing her first book! Scratch that, she's releasing TWO new books!
June Shannon took to Facebook tonight to share her exciting news! (Lauren is preordering her copies right now, I guarantee it!) June writes, "for all of u that love me, mama june, this is for u! I am writing a book bout our lives." The book is due out on July 2nd. She shared that a book tour is a real possibility, but she'll give more info as it unrolls.
Oh gracious! Kenya Moore had better redneck-ognize. The Real Housewives of Atlanta star is not being very Gone With The Wind Fabulous! In fact, I'd say she's the exact opposite. The former Miss USA 1993 is bashing on everyone's favorite seven-year-old reality phenomenon. Remember Kenya, pretty is as pretty does…and jealousy/mean girl remarks aren't very becoming!
Of course, Alana Thompson and Mama June know the old adage, and they live it with their good deeds–even if they get criticized for it. Not only is Kenya hating on the Here Comes Honey Boo Boo mother/daughter duo, but the the Girl Scouts of America are taking issue with the pair as well. Do you know who couldn't care less about either one? That's right. June and Alana are too busy helping their community to bother with such nonsense.
As if they weren't enough for 'Merica to handle, Alana Thompson and her family are all set to internationally dominate all things deer statutes, four-wheelers, and forklift foot. June Shannon, Sugar Bear, and Uncle Poodle are going to have people all over the world talking about the small town of McIntyre, Georgia…heck, the South in general. Here Comes Honey Boo Boo is going global! Frightening, huh?
I am a huge fan of the show–and a proud Southerner–but gracious, this is a lot to digest (and not just because I had 'sketti for dinner. Kidding–gag!). On one hand, I'm happy for the family and their successes. However, I hope that people in other parts of the world don't assume we're all eating pigs feet and going dumpster diving…not that there's anything wrong with those things!
Here's a question for you…given the opportunity, would you rather spend a day with the peeps from Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, engaging in their small town (and often gross) shenanigans or spend a week with those Kardashian Jenners, traveling to promotional gigs around the world and being treated to overpriced tiny rapper inspired wardrobes? I'll give you my answer later in this post.
The truth is, both families have their fair share of haters and media backlash, but they couldn't be more different. One group is constantly looking to increase its visibility and find more lucrative gigs, while the other dynamic happened to feed their five-year-old pixie sticks and enter her in pageants. Now, I am NOT condoning amping up a child on sugar and go-go juice so she can twirl around stage in a dress that costs more than your monthly income; however, one crew seeks out fame at every turn, and the other is dealing with the effects of having notoriety fall in their laps. It's not the same, I don't care how you spin it!
I remember a much simpler time when TLC was all about stories. There was A Makeover Story (fun fact: The Office's Angela Kinsey and her friend from an improv group were once on it before she became famous), A Dating Story, A Wedding Story, and (the only one still left) A Baby Story. Sure, it was a really long time ago, but The Learning Channel didn't used to be all about scary pageant moms, wedding dress salons, and Gypsy Sisters getting kicked out of hot pink stretch limos and tanning with motor oil. The only thing I learn from the network these days is how to make Here Comes Honey Boo Boo's sketti. I must add that my boyfriend Clinton Kelly calls TLC home, so he's bringing the class.
Now TLC is just ninety minutes up the coast from where I reside, in what may be South Carolina's version of the Jersey Shore. That's right! The Learning Channel has landed in Myrtle Beach, or "The Dirtle" as many call it. Don't get me wrong, Myrtle Beach is all kinds of fun and has a little of everything. It's like a tiny Vegas with a Planet Hollywood, a Hard Rock Cafe, and a giant shopping/restaurant/bar/music venue that spans city blocks and includes everything from Medieval Times to a mini Grand Ol' Opry that features singers who look just like actual country stars. Add in the helicopter tours and a shop on every corner that sells over priced beach towels, shark tooth necklaces, and hermit crabs, and you've got a little slice of heaven in the Palmetto State. Don't take my word for it–you can now see for yourself on TLC's new series Welcome to Myrtle Manor. Joking aside, I have friends from Myrtle Beach who are none too thrilled at the idea that this show is potentially mocking their hometown.
You have to love what constitutes a star these days…especially in the eyes of ABC execs when they are casting Dancing with the Stars. You can't really blame them though…whenLindsay Lohan turns down the show, it may be time to call it quits.
As always, rumors are swirling about who may foxtrotting across the ballroom. Some of the names being tossed around are more believable than others, and some would be pure television gold if the gossip proves to be true. Likewise, the speculation is often more exciting than the dancing itself. ABC's Bachelorette darling Emily Maynard's name has been thrown into the mix, as well as Here Comes Honey Boo Boo matriarch June Shannon. How amazing would that be?
There is nothing like the Shannon Thompson crew sporting tacky Christmas sweaters for yet another Here Comes Honey Boo Boo holiday special. It's a tad depressing to be watching all the Christmas preparations almost two months after the fact, but I am sure I will soon be thanking my lucky stars that I didn't spend my Christmas being sneezed on by any member of this family!
The episode begins with the June, Sugar Bear, Uncle Poodle and the girls decorating for Christmas and preparing for the crew's annual canned food and toy drive. I must commend them for their charity work. Last year, they were able to help 108 families in need, and this year June's goal is to raise $10,000 in donations. Sugar Bear is in charge of decorating the yard with countless light up plastic candy canes and nativity scenes, and I'm sure there will be some giant inflatable snow globes in the mix…a girl can dream at least. In the days leading up until Christmas, the family will spend their evenings standing in the overly decorated yard with Sugar Bear dressed up as Santa. Folks will come from miles around to see the debacle and donate items to the charity. They locate the plastic baby Jesus in the shed, but alas, his toes have been chewed off by some animal. I can barely get the phrase "forklift foot" out of my mouth before Chubbs steals my thunder.
Some of the decorations have seen better days, but June refuses to throw anything away. She attempts to fix a light-up white tree to no avail, declaring it the "Leaning Tree of Pisa." Alana shares that her mother is a hoarder and is also "bat poop crazy" when it comes to Christmas decorations. Hey, at least she said "poop," right? June is quite the handy woman with a roll of duct tape. Alana stays out of the way…singing a lullaby to the plastic baby Jesus before sneezing on him. I knew it was coming! I have to give it to June, she goes all out with the decorations, and she takes a lot of pride in their yard as it shows their Christmas spirit.