Last night reinforced an important lesson on Celebrity Apprentice, if you’re classy – reality TV is no place for you. Just a reminder: this recap, of course, contains spoilers so don’t read if you’ve been avoiding the internet like the plague for the last 24-hours.
The women’s team contains: Brandi (reality mega-villain and best selling tweeter about what she does with her twatter), Kenya Moore (Former Miss WHO-S-A, who had a Scepter App hidden her purse so not to violate the anti-props contract stipulations), Leeza Gibbons (talk show host), failed reality star Kate Gosselin (minus her 8 and the tumorous bunion known as Jon), Jamie Anderson (a former Olympic snowboarder with a long history of legal imbroglios who has the same plastic surgeon as Brandi – face. does. not. move.), Vivica A. Fox (hoping to resurrect her acting career by playing evil), Shawn Johnson (a former Olympic gold medalist who thinks social media usage qualifies as a legitimate career. Was she on DWTS?), and Keisha Knight Pulliam (formerly Rudy of The Cosby Show). The women’s team is infinitely more diabolical and interesting than the men’s team, but I suppose they came out and tried to play, so we have to talk about them.
The 2014 Met fundraiser gala (aka Charles James: Beyond Fashion" Costume Institute Gala) is tonight and Kim Kardashian took things up a few notches this year! Kim and (husband?) Kanye West just arrived and although we don't know Kim's dress designer yet, we can say it's a better look than last year's granny couch floral frock! Updated – Kim's gown is Lanvin with Lorraine Schwartz jewelry.
Also arriving in style: La La Anthony in purple, Giuliana Rancic in black, Ivanka Trump in green andKendall Jenner in a champagne number. Oh and Andy Cohen scored an invite, too.
Take a peek at the photos and cast your vote on Kim's dress below.
Last night, Donald Trumptold the remaining six victims on Celebrity Apprenticethat they all looked sick and tired. And, he’s right. I’m sick and tired, too. The marathon pace of the show is starting to visibly take its toll on the contestants. Or maybe the editing monkeys exaggerated everyone’s behavior. Whatever it was, after tonight’s elimination, there will only be one way to go, and that’s for everyone to turn on each other.
The challenge this week was to create a jingle for Good Sam, an emergency roadside assistance firm with a retro-esque mascot. What a shame that both our musically inclined “celebrities” were project managers last week. This week, Aubrey O’Day and Clay Aiken really could have shone, but instead Dayana Mendoza decided to PM, with Arsenio Hall managing Unanimous. Or, the reality, Aubrey took over the creative direction of the team while Arsenio’s true project management task was managing Aubrey.
On last night’s Celebrity Apprentice, both teams had to run improvisational puppet shows. Product placement department was really asleep at the wheel this week, since there was no corporate sponsor constantly being complemented. Ivanka Trump could barely bring herself to say “the executives” in the boardroom.
Since all shows on television now air on Sunday night, I’ll remind you that Lou Ferrigno was fired last week for only giving half of his usual “110%.” Lisa and Dayana shuffle back into the boardroom, Clay Aiken makes a snarky comment, which Lisa immediately overreacted to. Lisa, the woman who makes her living making fun of others, can dish it but certainly can not take it.
On this week’s task, Lisa Lampanelli elects herself as project manager in an attempt to finally win something, and Clay is shuffled over to Forte. Nice work, producers! Paul Teutul decides to manage this task, which is kinda weird. Aubrey O’Day would have been a shoe-in. Her hair alone is practically its own puppet!
Someone must have had a talk with Aubrey about her dominating ways because she decides to take a step back and let Paul run the show. And, since this is a different universe,Arsenio Hall & Aubrey are cool with each other! See what happens after you call your teammate a “See you next Tuesday!” You become friends afterwards. Paul had an injury the day before they start preparing for the act, so he is basically useless. Both teams get a lot of training on this task, in both, actual improv and puppeteering. Teresa Giudice loves that the improv guys encourage not knowing what you’re talking about. Do I really have to write a joke here? You know what to do, commenters! Take this and run with it. You’ve been given a gift.
Last night’s Celebrity Apprentice was so long and intense, I feel like I need therapy just to process all the emotions I now feel. At least the three hours finally made the show interesting.
In case you already forgot, Patricia Velasquez was the one to go last week for her failure with the branding at the Crystal Light event. Dayana Mendoza is sad to have her one ally leave. I loved that moment last week when Patricia told Dayana it was going to be okay in Spanish while they were both waiting to be called in with Donald.
At this point, Dayana is like this show’s Highlander. She refuses to die, no matter how badly Lisa Lampanelli wants her to go. Throughout this whole episode, Lisa is like a dog with a bone. She refuses to see any of Dayana’s positive qualities. It makes it so hard to root for Lisa when she just looks like a jealous hater.
Last night’s show featured two tasks: the first featured the teams making and selling celebrity guidebooks to New York, using a Toshiba tablet, or as I like to call it, not an iPad. The second task was for each team to create a 15 minute presentation and boxes on Walgreen’s new walking initiative.
We got new project managers for the first task: Teresa Giudice was project manager for the guidebook task and Dee Snider was task manager for the men’s team. Both of them were pretty hands-off. If there were any sources of drama for this episode, it once again came from Lisa and Aubrey. If Lisa is hard to root for due to her almost senseless rage towards Dayana, Aubrey became downright evil, especially during the second task when she butted heads against her new teammate Arsenio Hall.
But, back to the first task. Debbie Gibson was the sacrificed celebrity during the first task. Teresa’s one conflict as project manager was with Debbie, who rightly asked for direction on the women’s kiosk. At the boardroom, Teresa and Debbie got into it, with Teresa defending herself by saying that at this point, the team should know what to do with minimal direction. She has a point, but it did really seem like Teresa forgot they needed to design a kiosk to sell the guidebooks.
On the men’s team, it was sad to see Arsenio try to fund raise, but get ignored by his former celebrity friends. His friend and NBC pet Jay Leno promises to FedEx Arsenio a check. Both teams actually make it rain pretty hard with their fund-raising, Teresa has Juicy Joe come by the kiosk with donations from their friends. Does anyone think Melissa Gorga donated to Teresa’s efforts?
Anyway, in the boardroom, Debbie is fired and she’s visibly pissed off. The world’s most famous elevator attendant even smirks as Debbie storms off after she’s fired. The fact that Debbie was fired and Aubrey (who fundraised the least amount of money) was kept, feels really producer-driven to me. If the task was about who made the most money, then clearly Aubrey should have left, based purely on numbers. But, she and Dayana live to see another day.