Ariana Madix is in a funk. Is that funk is hanging out with Scheana Marie (who complains that Ariana hasn’t been there as much as Scheana needs her to be)? Ariana carries a general malaise that can’t be cured by looking hot in a lace bikini! If shopping doesn’t work like Prozac, something is amiss! It’s not like Ariana is Stassi Schroeder, living on Kristen Doute‘s couch (no, no – not the one she banged Jax on while watching Drive, but more on that couch in a bit!).
Andy has a little fun at James Kennedy‘s expense (and I’m not mad at him for it). About James calling himself the white Kanye West and saying the Pump CD is the single greatest thing he has ever done in his life, Brittany says, “That’s embarrassing.” Jax just says, “I don’t even have to say anything. He just kind of buries himself. It’s almost too easy.”
It has been quite a busy few days for the cast of Vanderpump Rules, from reunions to birthdays to new apartments and new friendships – they’ve had milestones! Tom Schwartz may not wanna grow up, but he’s engaged to Katie Maloney and forced to like go adulting. So, Tom 2 and Katie Who moved into a new apartment!
“I spent the whole day being a whiny ahole so I’m shaming myself on Twitter. We got a new apartment!” Tom2 shared on Twitter. Good for Tom and Katie. Did Tom 2 get a real job or something? Hopefully they’re get some new grownup furniture.
Our favorite reality TV stars cannot get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to social media to share even more of their lives with us. And we would not have it any other way. Here’s a roundup of some of our favorite snapshots and selfies from this week. Enjoy.
Last night on Vanderpump Rules an informal peace summit was finally staged, over shots, in, of all places, Lala Kent‘s apartment!
Stassi Schroeder is still milling around Los Angeles lost adrift the skeletons of the friendships she buried when Saint Patrick of the Mount Perfectionist Adultiness loved her. Now, knocked down to mere mortal status, Stassi is alone and friendless with only Kristen Doute (and Anonymous Stassi Schroeder Klone No 1. Kristina), to consume Pinot and laments with her. Luckily our trusty friend Lala will remedy allll that!
Over on the homefront – SUR – JaxTaylor is back at work after his shoplifting suspension but no one is glad to see him. Lisa Vanderpump isn’t finished with her tough love just yet! To really remind Jax of what a bad boy he’s been, she orders him to do *gasp* COMMUNITY SERVICE. She’s like a an uber-glamourous court circuit judge with a vendetta! Lisa remands Jax to gather all his unworn clothes to donate to charity. Plus, he has to force the Toms to do this with him.
Above: Vanderpump Rules star Tom Schwartz shared, “He whispered friendship goals during this picture and made things very uncomfortable. Happy Valentine’s Day mannnnnn. Missing our bubs Katie and Ariana.”
About the purple, all-lace dress Lala wears in her talking heads, Bobby says, “Dress is crazy. I just can’t understand how a human being can be so confident to just wear an outfit that’s just like, ‘Here’s what I got!’ I am a big Lala fan. I can’t find anything that Lala’s done wrong yet.” In response to a dirty look from Katie, he concedes, “I get it. I do not work with her; it is just a TV show to me.”
Katie has been working hard to build her blog and decides to throw an industry launch party to debut it to the world, so she can begin making money. What Katie really wants, however, is an exclusive party with a tightly-controlled guest list, so she can wander around SUR pointing at people with her new Scheana Marie witch’s talon nails snapping, “Invited!” “Not Invited!” as she plucks the leaves, one by one, off Lisa Vanderpump‘s 100 year-old custom-cultivated tulips originally cuttings from Josephine Bonaparte’s garden, once watered with the blood of Napoleon (can you tell I’ve been watching War & Peace? It’s like Vanderpump Rules with more complicated names, more conniving, decent fitting clothing, more lying, and swords instead of cocktail stirrers).