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Jay Mohr Housewives

On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey, it’s Merry Jersey-mas! Jacqueline hosts another Gorgadice Reunion, Teresa gets rowdy in court, Melissa gets a record contract, The Caroline‘s daughter has some issues letting go, and Kathy makes more plans to open a restaurant.

Things start out with preparations for Jacqueline’s holiday party/Gorgadice reunion. In the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard Ashley (yes ASHLEY!) counsels Jacqueline to stay out of Gorgadice drama. Um… can someone please counsel Ashley on how her orange spray tan is atrocious? Please, someone? She looks like a Snork with her bright orange face and high ponytail.

At the Manzo’s Santa is bringing patience and cheer and bitchy sisters. Poor Lauren is left out of Manzo sibling bonding since the boys have moved out. Farewell Ham Game! Oh, Lauren – she has officially become The Caroline, Jr – storming around and telling everyone what to do. Albie says one positive about living with Greg is that Greg won’t end up dating Lauren… Oh, really? Is it because he may end up dating Albie? I kid, I kid… After discovering a mouse has eaten the plastic Santa, the Manzos play Mariah Carey’s Christmas album, buy two all-feather Christmas trees, call Cher and Chris March and invite them to their annual Christmas drag show starring Joey G-to- the-Orga! Actually I made that last part up, but wouldn’t it be a lot more fun than watching the Manzos bicker about nothing again?!

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