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Jeff Lewis

Apologies in advance for the poor embarrassing tragic photoshopping skills. With that being said, let’s get right to the recap of episode 11 of the Real Housewives of New Jersey, brilliantly titled – Staub Wounds.

The episode starts out with a scene of Teresa and hubby Juicy Joe, as they get the girls ready so Joe can take them out. For a minute there, I was touched at the thought of Joe being a good father to his little girls, well that is, until Teresa casually mentions that Joe threats their daughters like boys, you know because he hasn’t been able to get the son(s) he wants after 4 tries…

Things then take a disturbing turn when Joe makes his very young daugthers fight each other after their karate lesson. I just found this scene to be all kinds of wrong and disturbing. Nothing wrong with putting his daugthers in karate/taekwondo, but the making them fight each other was just wrong and icky to watch.

We move on to victim Danielle, who has decided the best way to protect her weave self is to take self defense classes, at the suggestion of her ex-con rumored bed buddy Danny, who spends the entire time standing back in ring glaring at Dirty D. Danielle of course is involving her two daugthers in her quest to be the ultimate fighter. Danny suggests Danielle picture Teresa and Jacqueline in front of her as a means to add more fuel to her fighting fire. The Bravo cameras then pan to Danielle’s daugther Christine, who looks pretty embarrassed and would probably rather be back home doing homework at this moment.

Danielle gives us her best dose of crazy during her 1 on 1 interview when she declares, “Walking away is not good enough for them. They want to make you feel like the prey. And then they sit there and they go, I don’t know why you keep you saying you’re the victim. Well Bitch cause I am. Stop effing chasing me!”

The former prostitution coke whore then declares, “It only takes one good smack to the head to make a person never walk again.”

We see Jacqueline at home, and Kim Granatell, who is arguably the most two faced person in the universe, decides to pay a visit. I’m just going to refer to Kim G. as the newest housewife from here on out. I don’t even think she’s auditioning anymore for a slot on the show, she has obviously replaced Dina. No need to wait for a press release from Bravo. So why exactly did Kim G. show up to Jacque’s? Well to stir up the drama pot of course! The two rehash the country club drama and Kim G. informs us clumps did indeed come out of Danielle’s head.

Next up, we see Mama Bear Caroline making individualized eggs for all three of her very adult children. Two of the kids leave to go to work and Caroline and Albie McHottie Manzo discuss his future. Albie informs his mom that he needs to get a recommendation letter from his old law school before he can get into a new school.

Teresa, who filed bankruptcy just a few weeks before this episode was filmed, is shown going into Kim DePaola’s boutique Posche to do some shopping, but then again Teresa is never really shown shopping, but rather talking during her time there. Teresa once again assures the world her house is absolutely not in foreclosure. Stalker Wannabe new housewife Kim G. then randomly shows up, wearing a very age inappropriate sleeveless fur attire. Teresa once again states that she meant well in trying to strike up a conversation with Danielle, despite admitting on last week’s episode of Watch What Happens that her intention was to confront Danielle on some of the rumors she was spreading about her.

Teresa then makes a funny, the funniest quote of the night actually, when she states, “The only thing I regret about that night was pushing Kim G. because she is an older woman and I do respect the elderly.” Hilarious, especially considering that it came from the very unintelligent Teresa. And how old is Kim G. by the way? She can’t be a day younger than 70 60, no?

CLICK HERE FOR MORE RECAP! -

OC Housewives' Alexis Bellino, Lynne Curtin and Gretchen Rossi

Bravo held their 2010 Upfront Party at theSkylight Studio this week in NYC, and all of our favorite Housewives as well as other Bravolebrities were sure to be in attendance.

The upfront party is when Bravo announces what is to come during their next season of television.

OK magazine was there and was able to report some behind the scenes moments. Representing the Real Housewives of Orange County were Alexis Bellino, Lynne Curtin and Gretchen Rossi, who did not seem phased by their new competitionthe Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. The OC ladies joked that they did hear the Beverly Hills Housewives all have their own private jets.

The Real Housewives of NYC’s Jill Zarin, Ramona Singer and Alex McCord hit the red carpet together during which Jill would not reveal whether or not she and Bethenny will reconcile, simply saying “watch the show.”

Kelly Bensimon also hit the red carpet with LuAnn De Lesseps, and when asked how she thinks Bethenny will be as a mom, she replied, “I can’t really speak to that. I’m sorry.”

The Real Housewives of Atlanta were the only housewives franchise to all walk the red carpet together. The Atlanta ladies are reportedly getting along better these days.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey were also in attendance. Danielle Staub walked the red carpet by herself, while the four remaining housewives stayed together.

Also below are photos of Bravo stars from the Millionare Matchmaker, Flipping Out, Top Chef, Kell On Earth, and Shear Genius.

CLICK THE READ MORE BUTTON TO SEE MORE PHOTOS FROM THE EVENT -

bethenny-frankel-babyrachel-zoePatti-Stanger-bravo

With the huge success of their Housewives‘ franchises, Bravo has decided to increase their reality programming by 20% in 2010.  They announced their latest upcoming shows in a recent press release.

Coming this year is Bethenny Frankel’s new show titled Bethenny’s Getting Married? Interesting title to say the least.  Also returning is Patti Stanger’s Millionaire Matchmaker and Rachel Zoe’s The Rachel Zoe Project.

More information on the shows and their premier dates below -

Bethenny’s Getting Married? – As one of the breakout characters of “The Real Housewives of New York City,” Bethenny Frankel has shared her social life with millions, and in her new docu-series fans will get an up close and personal look at her career. Viewers will follow the outspoken New York City socialite as she juggles her happy love life, plans a wedding and prepares for baby while managing her insanely busy schedule and career as a natural foods chef.

The Millionaire Matchmaker – Premieres Tuesday, January 19 at 10 p.m. ET/PT “The Millionaire Matchmaker” follows Patti Stanger and her dogged staff as they give their big-bucks clients complete transformations with the help of personal shoppers, date coaches and therapists. In each episode, two wealthy clients are set up on dates hand-picked by Stanger based upon their beauty and intelligence. In the series’ third season, Stanger will stop at nothing to build her matchmaking empire – her business is flourishing, she has a successful book under her belt and is now hosting her own radio advice show.

The Rachel Zoe Project - The hottest stylist in Hollywood is back and offers an all access pass to fabulous fashion as “The Rachel Zoe Project” returns for a third season. The fashion-forward docu-drama delves further into the inner workings of Team Zoe as they jet from coast to coast attending store openings, fashion weeks around the world, and laboring to find the perfect gowns to adorn the red carpet during award season. This season Rachel parts ways with longtime employee and friend Taylor and Rachel and Brad welcome a new member to Team Zoe..

Kathy Griffin: My Life On The D-List - Returning for a sixth season of unpredictable hilarity is the two-time Emmy award-winning. Griffin has also signed on for two new stand-up comedy specials in 2010 with the network.

Flipping Out – The fourth season of Bravo’s popular docu-series “Flipping Out” returns with everyone’s favorite obsessive-compulsive house-flipper, Jeff Lewis. Lewis makes his living with the help of a group of diverse and often disgruntled employees he counts as friends. These include his incredibly patient assistant Jenni Pulos, who still dreams of making it as an actress, despite seven years at Jeff’s side, and his beloved housekeeper Zoila.

Top Chef: Just Desserts -  Top Chef judge Gail Simmons will serve as host of the network’s newest culinary competition series “Top Chef: Just Desserts,” a spin-off of the popular Emmy-nominated and James Beard Award-winning franchise “Top Chef.” The series, produced by the Magical Elves, will consist of pastry chefs competing against one another in a series of challenges.

The Real Housewives of New York City – The anticipated third season premieres Thursday, March 4 at 10 p.m. ET/PT.

Top Chef Masters - The second season of Bravo’s successful culinary spin-off premieres Wednesday, April 7 at 11 p.m. ET/PT and moves to its regular 10 p.m. time period on April 14.

Thintervention with Jackie Warner – An emotional new docu-series inspired by renowned fitness expert Jackie Warner’s life mission to change lives through healthy habits, “Thintervention” will give viewers an even closer look at what Warner does best – kick butt and inspire drastic lifestyle changes for her overweight clients who are struggling to lose weight and get healthy for good.

Shear Genius – Premieres Wednesday, February 3 at 11 p.m.  ET/PT.  Bravo’s creative hair-styling competition series “Shear Genius” is back for its third season with a whole new look.  International model and handbag designer Camila Alves makes her hosting debut alongside new series judge Jonathan Antin, celebrity stylist and former star of Bravo’s hit series “Blow Out.” Famed stylist Kim Vo returns as a judge for his second season, and new to the series, accomplished stylist Orlando Pita adds his voice of expertise as mentor to the contestants.

TELL US – WHICH SHOW ARE YOU MOST EXCITED TO SEE?

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