Everyone starts a new year with good intentions, right? Even reality stars! While I'm sure they all have a bevy of things they'd like to improve upon (one would hope!) we thought we'd give them a little help in that department. Below are some of the New Year's Resolutions we wish some of our favorite reality stars would make.
Kim Kardashian: 'Please let my mom leave me alone – I resolve to try and say no to her and stop putting all my embarrassing and indecent moments on TV. I really don't want to have to pull a baby out of my vagina on Keeping Up With The Kardashians like Kourtney did. Does being pregnant mean my child has already sold its soul to E!? I hope not. And I resolve to let being pregnant get more media coverage than that icky divorce. Hopefully my next TV wedding will be less of a mess.'
We really, really hope ol' Kimmie Kakes embraces the notion of privacy. Especially less nudie pics on Twitter and less revealing clothing. We've already seen it all, anyway. #sextape #playboy
Well, I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but Jenelle and Courtland have broken up once again. When Courtland talked to his daughter (and, by extension, her mother Taylor) on the phone Saturday night after Jenelle had gone to bed, Jenelle was not too happy about it.
Last time on Teen Mom 2, Leah Messer and Jeremy Calvert made their relationship official. Kailyn Lowry dumped Jordan in favor of getting back togeher with Jo Rivera, while Chelsea Houska agreed to give therapy a try in order to (finally!) get over Adam Lind. Finally, Jenelle Evans managed to avoid jail time after failing a drug test and met a new guy, Josh.
For reasons unknown, MTV decided to air Teen Mom 2 on Christmas Eve and began with Chelsea. Said in my best whiny Chelsea voice… uh-ugh…. Chelsea brings her orange skin, raccoon eyes, bleached-to-death hair, and frosty lips to the nail salon. Luckily, Chelsea and mom Mary have both removed their hair feathers, so there's room in the car for Aubree. Thank goodness for small favors. For a while there, I expected to see the hair feathers listed in the opening credits.
I'm elated Aubree comes to the nail salon. She is adorable and makes Chelsea's scenes bearable. I digress. While Chelsea, Mary, and Aubree get manicures, Chelsea announces that she's dropping out of therapy. She doesn't think she needs to go because the therapist didn't tell her anything she doesn't already know. Chelsea is all like, Everything she told me about boundaries and healthy and unhealthy relationships, I've already heard from every other person in my life. Basically, Chelsea doesn't want one more person – a person with a "dishing out advice" degree to boot – telling her that Ad-dumm is no good for her.
Well, that didn't last long, did it? Jenelle Evans and Courtland Rogers have been lovey dovey and tight on Twitter right up until late last night, but this morning they're heading for a divorce.
In a confusing set of Tweets that started off last night with Jenelle sharing that she was staying the night by her mom so she could spend time with Jace, somehow ended this morning with a break up. Jenelle shared, "Staying at BABS tonight with my precious baby boy, Jace Vahn. <3", but strangely, Courtland had Tweeted a few hours later that Jenelle had fallen asleep before him, leaving him bored.
Courtland Rogers (Jenelle Evans' new husband for those out of the loop for the past few weeks) should maybe consider taking a small Twitter break. Marrying one of the most controversial Teen Moms has thrust him into the hotbed of negativity that follows Jenelle and he doesn't seem up for the challenge.
Courtland and Jenelle have been battling on Twitter with Taylor Lewis, the mother of his daughter, Jordan. In one of his latest fights with Taylor, they don't see eye to eye on visitation issues on Christmas Day. Courtland swears he wanted to see his daughter, Taylor swears she was waiting for him to show up all day, but he never did.
On Monday Teen Mom 2star Jenelle Evans got a text message from her wise mother, Barbara, asking her to just stop putting everything out on the internet and take a break for a while. Jenelle defended her Twitter addiction, saying that she loves to connect with her fans. Jenelle should've taken her mom's advice!
Today Jenelle, her new husbandCourtland Rogers and his ex Taylor Lewis, the mother of his daughter Jordan, have been engaged in a war of words and photos and it hasn't been pretty. Some of it has been straight up incoherent, but here's the gist. They say there are three sides to every story, so we present to you the raging Tweets from Jenelle, Courtland and Taylor.
We begin as Leah and Jeremy make it official after her first motorcycle ride. When he asks about what went wrong with Corey to which she replies, "He did some things, I did some things." Jeremy doesn't care. He couldn't be happier that he sent that Facebook friend request!
Chelsea's friend has encouraged her to see a therapist. Chelsea isn't ready to give up Adam, but she admits to having issues with depression and low self-esteem before Adam ever came along.
Jenelle is passing all of her drug tests, and she's back in school. She has lunch with her mom Barbara, and she admits that she's stopped taking her bi-polar meds. Barbara wants Jenelle to make a doctor's appointment to refill her prescription which Jenelle says she'll do "when she has time." We all know how that turns out, don't we? She admits to her mother that she's going to hang out with a new guy. Barbara thinks that a new skinny kid is exactly what her daughter needs to take her mind off of Kieffer. She praises Jenelle's more responsible attitude and agrees to let her take Jace to Myrtle Beach for the day.
When Jo comes to pick up Isaac, Kailyn is crying over Jordan. He tries to console her by telling her any guy that would stand her up isn't worth the tears. Poor Jo. He can't win for losing.