The finale of Keeping Up With the Kardashians is FINALLY here! Which means the over the top thoroughly orchestrated storylines and extremely D-list acting is finally coming to an end. We can all exhale and relax. Or at least until E! starts shoving Kourtney and Khloe take the Hamptons down our throats.
The episode begins with a disclaimer that we are able to witness an episode shot almost entirely by Kim Kardashian’s family and friends. Basically this means that both the acting and the cinematography suck tonight. Strap in for one last wild ride folks.
Things begin with a gleeful Kris Jennerscreeching she is in Paris whilst pointing out obvious landmarks like the Eiffel Tower. I feel like issuing a quick apology disclaimer to both France and Italy for having such a nutso family invade their respective countries. Kris is on cloud nine prancing around during her dress fitting. Kanye West and Kris decide she should be showing more cleavage. #NoBoundaries Why does Kanye even want to see old lady cleavage? Kim comes to the rescue and demands Kris keep her boobs in her bra. #ProblemSolved The Jenner-bots look Ah-mah-zing in their bridesmaid dresses, but Kourtney and Khloe are not sold on the look.
Things kick off with Kimmie Kakes and Bruce Jennerenjoying a father daughter lunch. Kim is on a mission to drop the post pregnancy pounds so she can squeeze into a skin tight wedding gown. Kim decides to talk Bruce through the logistics of giving her away. Apparently Kim wants a solo walk for the first leg of her aisle walk and for Bruce to collect her after she passes the first fountain. Bruce likens the whole thing to a relay race. I think he was looking for the word circus. Tom-ay-to, Tom-ah-to. Changing gears, Bruce feels like all the embellishments on Kim’s crazy shoes looks similar to his a$$ when his hemorrhoids are acting up… yep when it comes to this family nothing is off limits. I think ‘dangleberries’ may have been used in this sentence but I was too busy vomiting to be entirely sure.
First and foremost let me congratulate Kim Kardashian on her 74 day anniversary of being married to Kanye West. Which for those of you may not know, is exactly 2 days longer than her previous marriage to Kris Humphries. You go Kim!
And speaking of her wedding, Kim finally opened up about her fairytale wedding weekend that took place in both Florence and Paris when she stopped by to chat with Jimmy Kimmel last night. She also shared some wedding insights that we probably will not get to see on Keeping Up With the Kardashians.
Our favorite reality TV stars cannot get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to social media to share even more of their daily lives with us. And we love them for it! Here’s a roundup of some of our favorite photos from this week! Enjoy!
Kanye West is the male version of Farrah Abraham. Anytime either Kanye or Farrah give an interview, I get a headache trying to make sense of it! I sit and stare at the words, hoping they will unscramble themselves, but they never do.
Kanye talked to GQ shortly after his wedding. The result is what I have come to expect from Kanye, scrambled nonsense yet strangely entertaining.
Kanye compared his new wife, Kim Kardashian, to a dinosaur. Because she’s “cool” and “rarely seen” just like a dinosaur. Um, rarely?! First, when was the last time Kanye saw a dinosaur? Second, Kim can be seen 24/7 via Instagram.
So, the Kardashians have been quiet lately, haven’t they? Yeah, right! If Kim and krew could go a day without gracing every form of media, I may be concerned for their well-being–or the well-being of North West, although Kanye West already has that covered. More on that in a bit…
This is rich. In fact, it’s amazing. Not only does it involve one of the hottest (in my opinion at least) reality stars, he’s making quite a statement. Brody Jenner, thank you for making my day.
Remember when Kim Kardashian and Kanye West married in a ridiculous spectacle complete with one of the Pinkett-Smith children dressed in a Batman costume? Of course you do, it wasn’t even 72 days ago! Well, think back to who wasn’t famewhoring withKeeping up with the Kardashians during the country hopping shindig. No, I’m not talking about Rob Kardashian being a no-show. I’m talking about Brody’s dreamy mug basically snubbing his step-sister’s third wedding. At the time, I thought, Maybe he doesn’t like weddings? But alas, he went to one last weekend…and it was for Kim’s ex-love Reggie Bush. I told you this was amazing.
Kanye only ever boasts about the status Kim, and her family, add to his life.
Now a new report, detailing Kanye‘s creepy control over Kim, has surfaced. Of course, “inside source” and “source close to the couple” type of reports need to be read with a “for entertainment only” frame of mind, but none of the claims sound too far fetched. Disturbing? Yes. Implausible? No.