I don't mean to be redundant, but I know I've said this before…bless Kim Kardashian's heart. Seriously, bless it. Not only does the mere mention of her name make people in the states automatically get a rash, now the Middle East is creeped out by her as well. That's got to be a tough cross to bear, and I don't even care for her. Yet I feel badly…must be the holidays.
As you all know, Kim has been touring Kuwait and Bahrain touting Millions of Milkshakes. I'm sure President Obama is super excited about the amount of diplomacy that's happening with that situation! Anyhoo, I'm sure poor Kim was thrilled at the opportunity to promote the dairy treats on the other side of the world while wearing the finest couture from the Kardashian Kollection and the tiny rapper's new shoe line. Little did she know she'd be welcomed with protests and discord. Of course, we probably all figured she would given her recent controversial (and likely clueless on Kim's part) tweets, but she was totally sidelined by her less than stellar welcome. Damn you, Twitter!
Yawn. It's like the most dramatic rose ceremonyKim Kardashian divorce ever. How is it possible that the divorce proceedings are lasting three times as long as the actual marriage. Why oh why can't Kim just admit that her marriage to Kris Humphries was for her reality show and spare us all the endless gossip and back and forth of this silly divorce? I mean, part of me is glad she isn't…I like my job, but we all know Kim didn't really want to marry him for real life purposes. The girl changes boyfriends/potential fiancés/randoms who may or may not be willing to walk down the aisle with her as often as I brush my teeth…and I have excellent oral hygiene. Never had a cavity!
What bothers me most about this divorce isn't the ridiculousness of it all or even the drawn out nature and pettiness from both sides. It is this: The whole thing could be over and done with if Kim would just admit the marriage was for show. Kris gets none of her fortune regardless…her prenup bars him recovery in the event of a divorce, and if there was never any marriage (which would happen with Kris' desired annulment), he has no basis for monetary gain there either. You can't get alimony if you never had a marriage. Sure, I guess they could find the prenup void and the marriage valid, but that doesn't work for the premise of my argument.
All Kris wants her to do is tell everyone what we already know…the wedding was for ratings. Nothing more, nothing less. I mean, she is literally laughing in our faces, thinking we are stupid enough to believe that it was a fairytale romance. We watch your show, Kim. You have more chemistry with the doormen of whatever building in whatever city you happen to be living in currently than you did with Kris. Basically, I just don't like being played for a fool. Kim, quietly admit to what we all already know and be done with it. It could actually help your sad image more than the path you're choosing. Off my soapbox and on to the divorce drama…thanks for indulging me!
Egads! A post where I actually have to exercise sensitivity…and about Kim Kardashian and her tiny rapper no less! I guess now that it's officially the holiday season, I need to practice more kindness and goodwill, right? Well, here it is.
While we were gorging on leftovers and shopping for major deals, KanyeWest was facing a heartbreaking anniversary…five years since the death of his mother Donda West after plastic surgery gone horribly wrong. Kanye, who has been fiercely protective about his mother's memory, has finally found a woman with whom he wants to share that part of his life. That's a pretty big deal, if you ask me. After the couple spent Thanksgiving with Kim's family, Kanye whisked his lady love to Oklahoma City to introduce her to his mom's family and visit Donda's grave site.
Kim and Kourt headed over to a launch party last night at Aqua and then Kim ditched out to go grab dinner at Hakkasan restaurant with her soon-to-be-husband-three, Kanye West. If you take a peek in the photo gallery, you'll see Kanye almost eat pavement.
Random observations: is Kim getting spraytan-happy again? Look at how white her hand is compared to her legs. And this one may show just how much time I spent watching videos on MTV back when they actually played music videos (or any music for that matter), but the first thing that came to mind when I saw Kourtney's tights and sheer sleeves were the twins who always wore polka dots in the Cinderella (hair band, not the princess) videos back in the day. No? It's just me?
I honestly think that if the Kardashians had to stay out of the spotlight for even just a day, they would shrivel up or something. Don't they get exhausted chasing fame? As if I don't already know the answer to that! They are never, ever going to go away.
Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe are gracing the cover of this week's print edition of Us Weekly, setting the record straight on all of the relationship rumors planted by mom Kris Jenner to keep her girls relevant swirling around. The magazine touts an exclusive, but it's really just a bunch of sound bites and sources and quotes. It doesn't appear that the sisters were actually interviewed for the article. Shocking, I know!
I feel like high stepping, finger snapping, dance-off gang fight is about to happen in Miami a la the Sharks and Jets, and the Sharks are the Kardashian sisters and their fans and the Jets are, well, everyone else. As you recall, the Kim and Kourtney got the boot from South Beach, but they landed in a very nice gated community in North Miami Beach. Granted, said gated community is near strip malls and convenience stores (I know, I totes have hives too just typing about it. Gag.), but those Kardashian girls are nothing without without their keen ability to adapt in any situation with other vapid ridiculously rich for no reason people.
Oddly enough, it was living near the Kardashians that led potential South Beach neighbors to send the girls packing. Now that filming has begun for the umpteenth spin-off of their family reality dynasty, the North Miami Beach natives are getting restless…or at least one of them is! There is apparently a disgruntled realtor on the scene. Um, he clearly didn't get the memo that it's called Kourtney and Kim Take Miami, not Some Guy Wants Money Thanks to Famewhores. Some people will always try to make a buck at the expense of innocent reality stars. Sadly, in this case, I'm not being sarcastic.
Can we get a slow clap for everyone's favorite momager Kris Jenner? On the heels of Khloe Kardashian being named an X Factor host alongside Albert Clifford SlaterMario Lopez, we're now learning more about the negotiations–or rather break down in negotiations–that occurred prior to the big announcement.
I, for one, am thrilled to see Khloe separating herself from her sisters in the business world. She needs her own platform to shine, and that will never happen if Kim is involved. I mean, didn't Kim make Khloe's infertility issues about herself when she decided to freeze her eggs so that she could breed on down the line with the tiny rapper? Khloe can't have anything–even a heartbreaking situation–that isn't overshadowed by a certain ego-driven sibling. Mark my words, Khloe and Mario will be sharing strained banter on the upcoming X Factor season, and Kim will streak across the stage, upstaging the next Susan Boyle (yes, I know she was Britain's Got Talent, but her first foray into reality television is still the most amazing thing I've ever seen. Tears.) wearing nothing but Kanye West's $5,000 high tops and a smile. I hate that I can picture it.
Now, we're learning that there is one other person in the family who also needs to reap the headlines when one of her offspring does something right. That's right. Kris Jenner needs to go quietly into the background and watch her creations succeed at…well, just being alive…and talking…in a microphone. Of course, we all know Kris' contract won't allow her to do that!