Katie Maloney

Vanderpump Rules recap

Last night’s Vanderpump Rules celebrated Pride, but it was far from the jubilant affair it usually is in light of the Orlando nightclub shooting, which happened the day before.

I’m not sure how to write this recap for a couple reasons: 1) there was a lot of the usual f-ked up SUR drama surrounding Pride and the tragic events; and 2) Tom Sandoval made his ugly cry face but it seems wrong to make fun of it because he was crying about the Orlando tragedy. Conundrum. I also feel bad swooning over how glorious Peter looked. (Cause he did).

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DailyMail.com & Elite Daily Holiday Party

Booze, fools, tons of disasters – if that doesn’t perfectly describe Vanderpump Rules, I don’t know what does. Sadly, all that mess came about because Tom Schwartz decided to unwisely hook his malfunctioning penis to the wheel that’s Katie Maloney and everything spun very far out of control.

“It was a disaster. It was a beautiful mess. That’s how I describe this season, a beautiful disaster,” Tom warns. “It’s a blur in retrospect, but a lot happens.” Jax Taylor agrees, adding, “There’s some crazy stuff that happens.”

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Krisen Doute

Kristen Doute has had more than her fair share of haters throughout her time on Vanderpump Rules, but I cannot help loving every scene she appears in. Kristen was made for reality TV – she is beyond sure of herself in every aspect, she says random shit without any sign of prior thought, and she has no shame when it comes to the mistakes she makes in front of the cameras. Kristen even managed to stay on a show about waitresses at a restaurant even though she got fired from said restaurant.

For the most part, I very rarely agree with anything she says, but I cannot help laughing. This chick is unintentionally hilarious and it seems like she has no boundaries when it comes to conversation topics. In a recent interview, Kristen defended slut-shaming Lala Kent (yeah not a good look for her), talked about Stassi Schroeder’s diet of Adderall and Diet Dr. Pepper (not the best anecdote to share considering their recently renewed friendship), and bragged about being a social media stalking expert (a claim I 100% believe).

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NEW YORK, NY - DECEMBER 07: Dorinda Medley and John Mahdessian attend the DailyMail.com & Elite Daily Holiday Party with Jason Derulo at Vandal on December 7, 2016 in New York City. (Photo by Rob Kim/Getty Images for Daily Mail)

It’s an all new edition of reality star sightings!

First up we have several reality stars hitting up the DailyMail holiday party, including Dorinda Medley and John Mahdessian, Ramona Singer, several cast members from Vanderpump Rules, including Lisa Vanderpump and more. And in case you’re wondering where Brittany has been while Jax is in NYC, she’s at home taking care of their new puppy.

Kyle Richards was seen in NYC doing press for the show (or her new series or Celebrity Apprentice or…who knows what exactly! She’s so busy lately!)

In the gallery you’ll also spy Heidi Klum, Courtney Stodden, Bethenny Frankel and more!

James

It’s a topsy-turvy world out there in SUR and last night’s Vanderpump Rules dove into its favorite subjects – cheating and Lisa Vanderpump‘s fabulosity!

Is there anything more confusing than a woman who is not only willing to have sex with James Kennedy, but do the sex in essentially a cot in the corner of his dorm room? Oh yes, there IS something more confusing – that this woman is willing to admit this sex on national television! The bright lights of LVP‘s sparkles reflected by Bravo cameras can cause a girl to lose her mind!

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tom-schwartz-katie-maloney

Newlyweds Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney were on Watch What Happens Live tonight. The Vanderpump Rules stars covered Lala Kent issues, Scheana Marie‘s divorce and even explained why Stassi Schroeder came along on their honeymoon.

Were they shocked about Scheana and Shay’s split? Tom says it came out of nowhere and Katie says “Of course. We all thought they would be together forever.”  Tom adds, “you never know what’s going on behind closed doors. They seemed happy from outward appearances.”

Scheana Marie Shay

I used to root for Katie Maloney to come out of Stassi Schroeder‘s shadow on Vanderpump Rules, but now that she has, she’s getting the mean girl edit as the new leader of the clique. Katie, Stassi, and Kristen Doute do not like LaLa Kent and they never have. So obviously they want to ostracize her to the point where it wouldn’t make sense for her to be in the cast and they can get LaLa off of (what they perceive to be) their show. And you know that squad was not going to tolerate Scheana Marie Shay being friendly with LaLa.

I can see why they wouldn’t want their friend to be friends with a woman that they have declared to be an enemy – but come on, LaLa is a SUR hostess and Scheana is a waitress, so they have to communicate every single time they’re at the restaurant. Why wouldn’t they just try to be pleasant when they interact? It doesn’t mean they have to be best friends, or even be friends at all, but having a civil rapport sounds better than being miserable every single shift. But maybe I’m just being too logical about this since Scheana seems to disagree.

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Scheana

High school… these problems matter! These people are in high school like the original cast of 90210 were. Meaning the “kids” on Vanderpump Rules are 30 going on 13, and it’s ridiculous.

Last night, Katie Maloney, Bridezilla of West Hollywood (she may actually just be straight up Godzilla at this point because she does seem to think she’s God), demanded Scheana Marie never, ever have an opinion contrary to Katie’s, like, ever again, and if Scheana does like ever, ever, ever deign to think for herself, she will be dumped like room temperature white wine.

Katie is the one who needs to be bumped – by Tom 2 and everyone else. She and Stassi Schroeder deserve each other.

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