On part two of the Vanderpump Rules reunion Lala Kent was asked the hard questions, and Jax Taylor‘s d–k in a pic was put under harsh scrutiny once again. I can’t imagine how he and Brittany Cartwright get it on considering how fuzzy that thing is – I mean… (I’ll be here all week folks!)
One of the major revelations of last night – and I say this with full and utter complete sincerity – is that James Kennedy and Jax realized they are essentially the same person, separated only by a decade, a sexual conquest number, Botox treatments, and a British accent. And nobody pops the lid off a Jax In The Box quite like a James In The Box!
So, after Jax realizing that he’d spent the reunion sitting next to his evil twin, and recognizing that there is power in numbers, Jax gleefully announced that he welcomes a Return Of The James (the Sequel Part 2) to SUR. Then Andy Cohen asked if James would DJ his birthday party. See – everybody loves sober James!
It’s happening, ya’ll! Jax Taylorhas scored a spinoff. The Vanderpump Rules star and his girlfriend, Brittany Cartwright, have headed south to highlight the old fish-out-of-water routine in their upcoming Bravo series, Vanderpump Rules: Jax & Brittany Take Kentucky.
The series will follow the couple to Brittany’s family farm, where she’ll force Jax to do chores in overalls. (Snort!) Will she force him to marry her though? According to series teasers, maybe so. To hell with Katie Maloney’s whimsical woodland wedding – we might be getting a real life backwoods wedding courtesy of Jax and Brittany all too soon!
The energy was high with Andy Cohen, Bethenny, and Jeff in the same room… shade was thrown, insults were hurled, and gossip was revealed. Oh and of course they talked about Luann de Lesseps and her marriage to Tom D’Agostino. Multiple times.
It’s official – sober James Kennedy is most definitely the world’s greatest DJ/reality TV villain/v-neck shirt wearer/bitchy uptight man child. And on part one of the Vanderpump Rules reunion it was most certainly James who won the night for me. Also Lala Kent came back, and it went well! So far…
First, priorities: we must delve into the wardrobe atrocities that always dominate these things. In this category Brittany Cartwright, bless her heart, was the worst offender. She was wearing what looked like a prom dress turned into stripper stage wear – clearly a Pinterest hack gone wrong. Actually Brittany’s dress kinda looked like one of Katie Maloney‘s bridesmaids dresses.
Although I am sad that this season of Vanderpump Rules season is coming to a close, there’s nothing I love more than those reunion episodes and part one seriously brought the entertainment. Not only that, but I got to enjoy the Southern Charm season premiere right after that. You’re probably going to judge me for admitting this, but it was the best Monday I’ve had in a while.
I know that Kristen Doute has been a pretty polarizing character on Vanderpump Rules, but I have to say that I’m at this point where I think Kristen is the person who always keeps it real. She doesn’t try to look better than she is, she owns up to her mistakes, and she has no issue sharing all of her weirdness- like owning and wearing multiple fake engagement rings in public.
Kristen talked about dating, her relationship with James Kennedy and how it’s weirdly not-at-all weird that her current boyfriend Brian Carter slept with Katie Maloney. Not only that, Carter apparently has other ties to the group.
Although I ended up crying for most of the Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney wedding episode of Vanderpump Rules, I never expected to feel that way. This season was full of drunken fighting and it was hard for me (and a lot of the other viewers) to get on board and feel invested in this couple.
A LOT of people hated on Katie throughout the season – she even had her Twitter account on private for a while – but after that finale, a lot more people from the fandom were down with the Schwartz marriage. Unfortunately for them, the reunion was taped way before that finale aired, so I bet that they had a ton of tough questions to answer from the viewers.
I have to keep it real with you, I shed some unexpected tears during the Vanderpump Rulesseason finale. This whole season, it was difficult to get on board with Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz’s relationship, but they totally drew me in during the wedding episodes. Even Jax Taylor – who had little to no faith in the marriage – cried during the ceremony.
Even though Jax was questioning Tom and Katie’s relationship until they tied the knot, he was actually on deck to officiate the wedding after Lisa Vanderpump initially said no when the couple asked her. Don’t get me wrong, Lisa did a beautiful job, but it would have been entertaining to have Jax – of all people – marrying Tom and Katie. I mean, he had sex with half the bridal party. It would have been hilarious.