Hey Jenelle Evans, if you scream it loud enough, someone may believe you! The Teen Mom 2 star is trying to convince anyone who will listen that she is clueless (at least she's not lying about that part!) about how heroin got into her house.
You may recall that the reality star was arrested on Tuesday for possession of heroin and Percocet…oh, and assault. I've come to the conclusion that the authorities in North Carolina have a box labeled "and assault" that they are trained to check whenever a Jenelle arrest occurs. I swear, this chick could be collared for jay walking and an assault would be involved…as she'd probably threaten to push other pedestrians into oncoming traffic. Geez.
It's court day for Jenelle and Gary Head (or, as we like to call it, Tuesday), but she has high hopes for the day. Gary admitted to getting physical with Jenelle, so her lawyer, Dustin Sullivan, will charge Gary with assault and request for Jenelle's charges to be dropped. Kieffer Delp nonchalantly asks Jenelle if there's any chance she'll go to jail. It's all good, Jenelle says, because she totally stopped getting high two weeks ago. Kieffer is nervous. Not because he cares about Jenelle, mind you, but because he needs a place to make his pot pipes.
One hour later, Dustin congratulates Jenelle on another good day in court, revealing that all charges against her have been dropped. Seriously?! Jenelle has more lives than the entire cast of CATS. One thing is for sure, if I ever get in trouble with the law, I'm calling Dustin the Judge Whisperer.
With each season and every episode, Teen Mom 2 just gets more and more depressing. I honestly don't think that Leah Messer, Kailyn Lowry, or Chelsea Houska are getting any more mature…their kids are just getting older. Notice I didn't even mention Jenelle Evans. Seriously, what's the point anymore with that one?
Leah is finally getting over the divorce despite the fact that she was once in love with Corey Simms…like the day before this scene was filmed. If you can get over it in a day and a half, chances are it wasn't true love. She's ready to focus on getting back into school for nursing.
Jenelle's friend Tori bails her out of jail, and Jenelle is upset that her mother wouldn't do it. I'm more upset that Tori does! I think she begins to regret it when she learns that she'll be responsible for paying $10,000 if Jenelle is a no-show for court. Given Jenelle's track record, Tori could have a very hefty fine on her hands! Both girls lament about how horrible Barbara is for taking care of Jace not springing Jenelle from the clink. Meanwhile, Chelsea is desperate to get out of the house. She's totally stressed out about not studying for her GED and her relationship woes with Adam. Now that he's no longer squatting for free at her apartment, he doesn't really want to talk to her. Not shockingly, her friend isn't that sympathetic, but she does surprise Chelsea with tickets to Deirks Bentley (jealous!) for the night before a practice GED test. This is what most would call a conundrum…but not Chelsea. She like so used to totally cry to Deirks' songs when she was pregnant with Aubree and Adam would treat her like crap.
Every week I get a little more frustrated with these girls of Teen Mom 2. MTV is paying them, and they are learning nothing except how to be more whiny and entitled. I really think the network should incorporate some kind of weekly therapy session for Jenelle Evans, Chelsea Houska, Leah Messer, and Kailyn Lowry to make it a little more relevant and a little less rewarding immaturity and bad behavior. Anyone agree?
Case in point, we begin with Chelsea trying to tame her peroxide weave while lamenting about taking her GED practice test in the following week. She really needs to study, but she has way more important things to do…like plan Aubree's birthday party, attend freeloading Adam Lind's motocross race, and devise a plan to keep her dad from finding out that Adam is squatting on his dime. Priorities, of course. Of course, Chelsea's third priority didn't work out so well because she forgot her dad has a key to her house and decided to take a peek inside when he came to pick up Aubree. She tries to act indignant, like what are you doing in my house? I want him to retort with, um, it's actually my house considering I pay for it, but instead Randy promises her they will discuss the situation later.
Oh wait, Chelsea explains that she pays her own rent, so maybe I would be a tad upset if my dad busted in, but still. She arrives at the race, and it's so pitiful to watch her try to kiss Adam and hold his hand while he totally brushes her off and then walks away. Chelsea acts totally oblivious to his behavior.
Last night's Teen Mom 2 brought tears, tears, and more tears. Leah Messer finds that a reconciliation is not in the cards, while Jenelle Evans continues to screw up her life one failed drug test at a time. Kailyn Lowry can't understand why Jo Rivera is playing her. It's totally different than when she did it to him! Finally, poor Chelsea Houska. I think all that bleach has permanently affected her brain and her judgment. Who am I kidding? I am giving her hair dye far too much credit!
We begin the episode with Leah. She's upset that estranged husband Corey Simms doesn't want to try to salvage their relationship. She only cheated once, so what is the big deal? Their twins are precious, but they are even cuter when they are biting their mom. Leah receives an e-mail from her attorney about a settlement agreement. Also not wanting to reconcile is Jo with his ex Kailyn. Kailyn is sad that Jo has moved on with his own video vixen, but at least her bestie is home from college to keep her company. She tells her friend about her love triangle with Jo and Jordan, as well as her non-existent relationship with her mom. It's been five months since the pair has talked, so Kailyn calls her. After being sent to her mother's voicemail, Kailyn has Isaac leave a giggling message of nonsense before she talks. She doubts she'll get a call in return.
Chelsea is thinking about quitting her job at the tanning bed. I don't think she's thought this through. How is she going to maintain that natural orange glow throughout the winter months? I am also confused as to what kind of headdress she is sporting. Oh wait, that's her actual hair. WTH? Doesn't she want to go to beauty school? Who would let her color their hair after seeing what she does to her own? Chelsea and Adam Lind are hot and heavy again, despite Chelsea's best efforts to take things slow. Bwahahahaha! Adam arrives, and Chelsea begins the requisite baby talk we've all grown to loathe. With her twentieth birthday being the following day, Chelsea requests her gift from Adam. It's a promise ring. He promises not to be as much of a d-bag as in season's past. It's a start. Baby Aubree bursts into tears at her mother's excitement. Smart kid!
I don’t even know what to say about the fact that train wrecks of Teen Mom 2 are back for another season. Part of me roots for these girls like no tomorrow, but the other part of me wants them to get their shiz together off camera and step up to the plate. Regardless, Jenelle Evans, Kailyn Lowry, Chelsea Houska, and Leah Messer (now Calvert) are back for yet another round.
Right off the bat, we’re reminded of the tension (for lack of a better word) between Jenelle and mom Barbara. Jenelle has broken up with Kieffer Delp while completing a rehab stint for her marijuana addiction, and she’s been diagnosed as bi-polar. She plans to stay on the straight and narrow. I’ll keep my laughing to a minimum. Jenelle shares that she and her mother are getting along well, and her attorney Dustin Sullivan calls to remind her that one passed drug test isn’t a victory. She needs to remain on the straight and narrow.
Chelsea recaps her past with the always awesome and supportive Adam Lind. While Chelsea appreciates that her mom is willing to help her with daughter Aubree’s childcare, she hates that her job at the tanning bed keeps her from spending so much time with her kid. Chelsea reveals to her mom that Adam may move in over the weekend, although they aren’t quite back together…at all. He’s just being nice. Shocking, I know!
Are you still with me? Here goes nothing… on her blog, the Teen Mom 2 star proudly proclaims, “I think I have broken the “Gary/Kieffer” Spell I was under! YES!" Yes, Kieffer Delp and Jenelle are off again. So sad. Just a few days after that shocker expected turn of events, Jenelle declares her love for a new guy, Courtland Rogers.
Jenelle shares, "Courtland and myself have made it official that we are in a relationship now. I'm so excited to start this new chapter in my life. Everyone is going to love him. He is so caring, loyal, and knows how to take care of himself. I have a good feeling about this relationship."
If ever there was a time I am thankful that reality TV has captured the horrible behavior of people it’s in the case of Jenelle Evans. TheTeen Mom 2 star has just announced she wants to take her mom, Barbara Evans, to court for full custody of her son Jace! And a friend declares that Jenelle is changing her life in preparation for a court battle.
I have to warn you in advance this story makes me furious and and I am letting Miss Nude Photo Scandal have it – via blog snark of course!
I’m not sure when Jenelle will find the time to parent in between her constant legal dramas and nude photo scandals and accusations of drug use and constant loser boyfriend procuring and tweeting, but apparently she thinks she will. Maybe she can give up her lucrative career of selling Scentsy to make time for her son. #sarcasm.