I'm going to go ahead and apologize in advance for this blog post because I know I'm going to offend people with my bluntness and stupidity…even people who roll their eyes at the mention of all things Kim Kardashian, Kanye West, little KompassNorth, and the child that is most certainly NOT America's Baby.
First things first…a quick disclaimer: just because I doubt that Kim and the tiny rapper's newborn has yet to sit up, say her first word, moonwalk, or buy her first pair of Manolos does not mean that I am in any way making fun of the baby's development. That said, the founder of the Pussycat Dolls is claiming the child is already giggling up a storm. False. Not false because I am snarky and Kim irks me, but false because I took more than my share of child development classes. I don't doubt that gas is making North make some super precious faces, but she's not actually laughing.
Oh Kris Jenner! Before the ratings for her upcoming talk show even have a chance to go south, the pimpmomager is taking every opportunity to chat about new granddaughter North while on a press tour to promote her new daytime venture.
E! shares that Kris was absolutely gushing over daughter Kim Kardashian's newborn with tiny rapper Kanye West on the TODAY show. Unfortunately, I missed it as I have made good on my promise to boycott my former favorite morning show after they aired Kris chatting about breast implants instead of observing a moment of silence for 9/11. Have you seen GMA? Loves it!
Not surprisingly, this week's People has dedicated its cover to the "Delivery Room Drama" surrounding America's baby. Yes, I realize Kanye West said his daughter wouldn't be America's baby, but it's just so flipping funny. Here's the thing…was it really super dramatic?
Now, I realize that giving birth prematurely is no joke, but can I just throw out a conspiracy theory that her due date may have been misconstrued? Mind you, it's not a theory I was smart enough to concoct on my own, but I jumped right onboard. Can't you just picture Kris Jenner pressuring daughter Kim Kardashian into giving the press an earlier due date? "But Kim, just think about all the attention you'll get when you go into premature labor?" In my head, the conversation takes place in the back of a limo with blacked out windows…just like this one (an oldie but a goodie, of course!). It wouldn't be the first time the family fibbed..
But again, that's my bishy, trash-loving brain talking. Obviously, regardless of her true due date, I am happy that mother and baby are healthy.
Not surprisingly, the Kardashians are proving time and time again that they are A LOT to keep up with…especially with Kim and Kanye West's new addition. Throw in mom Kris Jenner's uncontrollable need to pimp out anyone with her DNA, and you've got a veritable rodeo of gossip to whet your appetite!
According to Radar Online, Kris has been hinting non-stop that Kimye, Jr. may make her television debut…not on Keeping up with the Kardashians, but on the pimp momager's new daytime talk show. An insider said that Kris basically urged viewers “to tune into her new talk show to get all the inside scoop about Kim’s newborn baby," adding, "When someone asked Kris if the baby would make an appearance on the show, she demurely said ‘you will have to watch.'"
The same source reveals, “Kris was asked if she had any pictures of the baby, and she revealed she did, but didn’t want share with anyone. Kris was absolutely loving all of the attention she was getting, and was absolutely milking it."
Now the real fun begins as everyone speculates as to whether the baby will be kept out of the spotlight per Kanye's wishes or whether the poor child will be Kris Jenner's newest kash kow. Bless that child.
Deadline is reporting that the newest West Kardashian won't be getting it's own special (yet), but she will likely make her debut on season eight of Keeping up with the Kardashians. Wait, what!?! 'Ye, did you green light this?