On part 3 of the Vanderpump Rules reunion, James Kennedy gave out “ass holes” galore. Most of them deserved. Although James calling anyone an asshole is the very definition of “irony” – look it up in the Bravo Dictionary! Far from being The White Kanye West, James is more accurately the less stupidly-haired Donald Trump.
Alas, before James opens his can of asshole with the index finger of doom, Stassi Schroeder argues with Lisa Vanderpump about her sex tape. Did we ever figure out why the hell Stassi Does Dildos is only worth $900? Honestly I would expect it to be more like $9.99 clearance, but I mean, whatever whets your whistle! Stassi accuses Lisa of asking her parents to repay the money, and is furious Lisa didn’t demand Stassi’s”ex-boyfriend” sign a contract after getting paid, nor did LVP get the footage back. Exactly what was Stassi doing while Lisa was combing the slums of Beverly Hills like an Archer episode to recon a sex tape absolutely no one butScheana Marie wanted to watch?
No one cares about Stassi and her sex tape, (except for Kristen Doute, who keeps trying to interrupt until Lisa instructs her to “shut up”).
Our favorite reality TV stars cannot get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to social media to share even more of their lives with us. And we would not have it any other way. Here’s a roundup of some of our favorite snapshots from this week. Enjoy.
Since we’re starting out with the worst, Andy replays footage of James Kennedy getting eaten alive by SUR hostess Lauren, then coming to work proudly showing off his battle wounds. He’s a survivor! Lisa Vanderpump was unimpressed. The best part was learning that Lauren’s boyfriend, hot bartender Anthony, dumped her over the incident. Ouch – getting dumped for James has gotta hurt!
Last night was the beginning of the Vanderpump Rules reunion. Lisa Vanderpump is dressed like a “school marm” but it’s really quite ridiculous and hideous. Lala Kent got her makeup done at the circus, from the elephants who can paint – it’s pink, sparkly and reminds me of Tammy Faye Baker.
BTW: When is Kristen Doute gonna admit to getting her boobs done? She’s got them out every 15 seconds just waiting for someone [ANDY COHEN] to notice and comment, but alas the satisfaction is not being given.
The major topics up for discussion are James Kennedy‘s drunken excesses and the mysteriously unexplained reasons Jax Taylor despises him. Kristen’s apology tour, and lastly Scheana Marie being the worst wife in the world. Apparently she’s just not educated on addiction – which is why she never bothered to you know CALL A THERAPIST or Google NA meetings!
Last night’s Vanderpump Rules reunion, part one, dedicated a fair amount of time to rehashing Scheana Marie and Mike Shay‘s troubled first year of marriage. While Shay battled a Vicodin addiction off camera, Scheana turned to her paid castmates friends for support. How Scheana spoke about sobriety (Don’t be a sober bore!) and her apparent non-support for Shay’s sober aspirations (Here, have a vodka-soaked tampon!) got her into a lot of hot water with the viewing public.
Now Scheana is backtracking – ScheanaStyle! Which means she feels sort of bad…but not really. (Wait – is it all Stassi Schroeder‘s fault!? Yeah, let’s blame her!) She reflects, “I don’t like to have regrets. I live and learn and I learned a lot this year watching the show back and seeing the negative feedback. I will say that I’m thankful for how hard this past year was because it humbled me and made me look at things from an outside perspective. A lot of things I said were taken out of context and that was extremely frustrating. I never meant to come off as unsupportive or uneducated.”
The THREE-part Vanderpump Rules reunion kicks off tonight. Bravo asked each cast member what was going through their minds as they took the stage.
Lisa Vanderpump admitted she’s a little worried about James Kennedy and Jax Taylor, adding, “I hope that they keep it civilized … There is one person in particular that is so volatile I just, you know, don’t want them getting out of their seats. That is a factor as well … You know it is going to kick off at some point.”
It’s safe to say that Monday’s episode was deliciously predictable, with Stassi Schroeder and Kristen Doute crashing Villa Rosa to attend Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz’s engagement party. Jax’s girlfriend Brittany Cartwright proved once again that she has more patience than the entire cast combined (times a million), and Scheana Shay and Adriana Madix are once again biffles…even if their reconciliation was a product of Scheana’s insecurities about being ousted by Stassi. All is right with the world.
When I found out that the Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion was going to be stretched out over three episodes, I was like, Seriously? Nothing happened! But I honestly didn’t have that reaction when I read the “drama-filled three part reunion” press release for Vanderpump Rules. This season, which is on track to be the highest rated season, did not disappoint this hopelessly addicted fan.
About the ratings, Bravoshared, “On track to deliver its highest rated season ever among all demos, Vanderpump Rules season four is averaging 1.5 million P25-54, 1.4 million P18-49, and 2.2 million total viewers, up 17 percent, 8 percent and 13 percent respectively versus last season.” Look below for the schedule, as well as a sneak peek, for the Vanderpump Rules reunion.