Kristen Doute

pump-rules-reunion-shay

Well that’s it – another season of Vanderpump Rules done and done! But the third part of the reunion ended with quite a bang when Scheana Marie‘s estranged husband Mike Shay appeared to say everything and nothing at all.

Good lord – the girls on this show are ridiculous! Like Katie Maloney, nothing is ever Scheana’s fault as she just demands, cries, and throws tantrums then blames everyone else. Tom 2 – consider Shay your warning; Robert Valleta – consider Tom 2 your warning.

Before we witness Scheana Marie collapse into a cloud of pressed powder, we have much ground to cover. While Andy wasted time last week trying to make Stassi Schroeder‘s brother ‘happen,’ the reunion could have focused on all the drama between James Kennedy and Kristen Doute, or that time Tom 2 almost canceled his wedding while pooping in a wedding gown, as Tom 1 was crying in a Sia costume. Aaaaahhh… good times in New Orleans!

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Vanderpump Rules - Season 2

I will never stop watching Vanderpump Rules, but I do find myself missing the show’s early days. Those first couple of seasons were iconic. From Jax Taylor and Stassi Schroeder’s all-encompassing romantic relationship to single Jax “dating” multiple people at once, there was always something crazy happening in every single episode. I do still love this show, but there are plenty of things that I miss about the beginning of Vanderpump Rules.

I’m all for moving forward, but there are plenty of other things about the beginning of Pump Rules.

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VANDERPUMP RULES --

Without a doubt, Brittany Cartwright is the most lovable person on Vanderpump Rules. It’s kind of surprising that she fits in with this cast of characters, but she really does bring a much-needed sense of balance and kindness to a show that’s chock full of drama.

It could have been really awkward for Brittany to come on a show and join a group of friends that includes her boyfriend’s ex girlfriend, former hookups, and occasional enemies, but she somehow made it work and navigated the unique situation like a pro. Even so, Brittany (somehow) gets social media hate. Don’t worry about it though. Sure, Brittany seems like the nicest person on the planet, but she knows how to handle herself when needed.

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Poor Scheana

This was a tough season of Vanderpump Rules for Scheana Marie . She returned to her original role as an outsider in the clique and she filed for divorce from Mike Shay. And now she has to relive it all in a three part reunion special.

Not only that, but Scheana is also discussing her new relationship with Robert Valletta and two times when Stassi Schroeder majorly offended her. And of course, she plugged her own solo project: an internet talk show.

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Lala

On part two of the Vanderpump Rules reunion Lala Kent was asked the hard questions, and Jax Taylor‘s d–k in a pic was put under harsh scrutiny once again. I can’t imagine how he and Brittany Cartwright get it on considering how fuzzy that thing is – I mean… (I’ll be here all week folks!)

One of the major revelations of last night – and I say this with full and utter complete sincerity – is that James Kennedy and Jax realized they are essentially the same person, separated only by a decade, a sexual conquest number, Botox treatments, and a British accent. And nobody pops the lid off a Jax In The Box quite like a James In The Box!

So, after Jax realizing that he’d spent the reunion sitting next to his evil twin, and recognizing that there is power in numbers, Jax gleefully announced that he welcomes a Return Of The James (the Sequel Part 2) to SUR. Then Andy Cohen asked if James would DJ his birthday party. See – everybody loves sober James!

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Kristen

I have been watching Vanderpump Rules since the beginning and I can’t believe that I’m at a point where I am waiting for Kristen Doute to come on screen. She has done some questionable things (I won’t recap, but if you are dedicated, you are in the know), but she has moved past that and owned it all. She is the most fun person in the cast and she is the most honest. Love her or hate her, at least she’s speaking truth instead of trying to control image… like some of the other cast members reaching for a story line.

Unfortunately, Kristen‘s truth includes dating James Kennedy, who may or may not have used her to get a spot on this show. She started out the show dating Tom Sandoval, which seems like a lifetime ago…until Kristen shades him or calls him out for something during that time period. Now Kristen is in a stable relationship with Brian Carter, and it seems like Crazy Kristen is no more.

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Sober James Kennedy

It’s official – sober James Kennedy is most definitely the world’s greatest DJ/reality TV villain/v-neck shirt wearer/bitchy uptight man child. And on part one of the Vanderpump Rules reunion it was most certainly James who won the night for me. Also Lala Kent came back, and it went well! So far…

First, priorities: we must delve into the wardrobe atrocities that always dominate these things. In this category Brittany Cartwright, bless her heart, was the worst offender. She was wearing what looked like a prom dress turned into stripper stage wear – clearly a Pinterest hack gone wrong.  Actually Brittany’s dress kinda looked like one of Katie Maloney‘s bridesmaids dresses.

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Countdown To Katie's wedding - Kristen

I know that Kristen Doute has been a pretty polarizing character on Vanderpump Rules, but I have to say that I’m at this point where I think Kristen is the person who always keeps it real. She doesn’t try to look better than she is, she owns up to her mistakes, and she has no issue sharing all of her weirdness- like owning and wearing multiple fake engagement rings in public.

Kristen talked about dating, her relationship with James Kennedy and how it’s weirdly not-at-all weird that her current boyfriend Brian Carter slept with Katie Maloney. Not only that, Carter apparently has other ties to the group.

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