All hail Lord Douche-ick Disick! It’s hard being royalty, especially when the United States’ version of royalty is over-paid, under-educated, over-exposed reality personalities who are famous because someone who is related to someone they once or thrice procreated with was tee-tee’d on (I’m old and Southern, sue me for not being cruder..in this instance at least!) for a multi-gajillion dollar sex tape. Such are the conundrums of Scott Disick.
Sure, the reality star is NOW famous (for lack of a better word) in his own right. He’s got three kids with family kash kow Kim Kardashian’s sister Kourtney, and the pair have a slew of spin-offs under their over-priced (but kind of classless) belts. But let’s be honest, Scott’s infamy is a product of his entitled behavior and penchant for booze and pills (allegedly). Plus, he’s a Lord, y’all, and he does what Lords do, like shattering mirrors in drunken rages, hating on his girlfriend’s family (warranted, so he’ll get a pass), and shoving dollar bills into the mouths of waiters who fail to cater to his every gross whim. Klassy!
Kylie Jenner is the youngest member of the Keeping Up With The Kardashian klan and has lived most of her life in both the spotlight and in the shadow of her elder siblings’ drama. But now Kylie finally has some drama of her own – oh goody – which means the Pimpmomager is finally putting her on magazine covers and paying attention.
The success of Kim Kardashian‘s mobile game Kim Kardashian Hollywood doesn’t surprise me. Like it or not, the Kardashians are a cultural phenomenon that isn’t going away anytime soon.
There are two things, however, which I do not understand. Why would anyone pay money to be a virtual Kim Kardashian? People are paying money – and a lot of it – to join their virtual Kim on virtual vacations, to dress their pretend self like the real Kim, and so on. It has been estimated that the Keeping Up with the Kardashians star will earn $85 MILLION this year from the game. And this brings me to my second question. Why is Kim taking her clothes off for obscure magazines every other week if she’s bringing in that kind of money for basically doing nothing? Obviously, it’s for the attention, but still. I don’t get it.
This week in new reality star sightings, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are seen all over London together, but didn’t drag Nori around for this trip. We even have Kanye jumping up on a table at a fast food restaurant so he could give the fans what they want – Kanye at the center of attention.
In today’s FML news, Kris Jenner has reportedly inked a $100 MILLION deal with E! to keep Keeping Up with the Kardashians on the network – as well as every time someone in the family “takes” a city against its will – for at least FOUR more years. I’m moving to Mars. Who’s with me?
According to Page Six, the record-breaking deal includes Kris, Kim, Kourtney, Khloe, Kendall, and Kylie, and it goes well beyond the core show. Keeping Up With the Kardashians has spawned countless spinoffs, such as Kourtney & Khloe Take the Hamptons, and we can now expect to see many more. As well as more digital projects like Kim Kardashian: Hollywood, television projects produced by Kim, more of Khloe covering the red carpet events, a Kardashian YouTube channel, and the list goes on and on. I feel faint.
Most teenagers go to school, partake in after-school activities, hang out at the mall, work a part-time job for money for college, clothes, car insurance, and so on. Even poor Kim Kardashian had to work her butt off (don’t feel too sorry for her, she bought a new one) as a teen to afford $400 shoes. #sarcasm
Well, needless to say, Kris Jenner‘s younger spawns aren’t “most” teenagers. Last year Kendall hold the Jenner invested in a $1.4 million apartment when she was 18. Now seventeen-year-old Kylie Jenner has dropped $2.7 million on a five-bedroom, five-bath, nearly 4,900 square foot home in The Oaks.
It’s a topsy-turvy world in Kardashian Kingdom! Kris Jenner is losing her executive kontrol over the family $100 bill Kim Kardashian, and Scott Disick is reconsidering his priorities and deciding that all the Bentleys, Rolls, and Maseratis in the world aren’t more important than his kids!
I always say that nothing this family does surprises me, but it doesn’t mean I can wrap my head around their horrible antics and anything-for-fame mentality. In my mind, parents should be parents first, not friends, and certainly not people who see their kids only as dollar signs. In case you couldn’t tell, I’m talking about the Kardashian klan, and specifically Kris Jenner and her youngest daughter Kylie.
Obviously, given her older siblings “fame,” Kylie grew up a lot differently than other girls her age. Most seventeen-year-olds aren’t plumping their lips and jet setting around the world. Also, most seventeen-year-olds aren’t dating twenty-five-year-old rappers with a baby…and if they are, it isn’t with their family’s blessing. Yes, I know I don’t have kids, and yes, technically, at eighteen, she’s considered an adult. Sure, people will say that in a few years, that age difference won’t matter. My friends and I weren’t saints at seventeen, but our rebelliousness was more about splitting a wine cooler among three people or toilet papering the homes of boys (our age!) we thought were cute. Don’t think I’m just Katrashing Kylie because of her family…I felt the same way when my revered Lizzie Maguire was dating the Madden who’s now married to Nicole Richie. It’s just ew, and being famous isn’t a pass for ew. Even more ew? What Kanye West had to say about his young sister-in-law’s romance…although that doesn’t surprise me either.