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Part two of the Shahs of Sunset reunion was not nearly as explosive as part one but there were a few moments worth discussing. So my favorites revolve around Lilly Ghalichi and Mercedes "MJ" Javid's crazy mom Vida, but MJ saying that only Persians have to deal with responsibilities like working, caring for pets, cooking, and cleaning definitely deserves a shout out. What. A. Twit.

To kick things off, Andy Cohen revisits Reza Farahan attacking Sasha earlier this season.  Reza claims he's sorry then starts in with his "woe is me" excuses. He says Sasha talking about the Iranian Revolution set him off,  adding,  "None of them can understand how that makes me feel – I am someone who suffered for 40 years because of the crap they did in Iran. My name is Reza and I look like this. My name is not Lilly. My name is not Mike. My name is Reza and I look like this. I am as Persian as Persian gets when you look at me."

Andy is like, how does that justify insulting Sasha? Andy insists FOB (fresh off the boat) is a hateful thing to say to someone. Reza and MJ disagree. MJ calls it mere teasing. Andy reminds them that Reza made fun of Sasha's accent also. Reza says, "Absolutely!"  MJ adds, "It's really annoying."  Two peas in a pod.

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Season three of Shahs of Sunset ends tonight with part two of the reunion.

Whether or not the Shahs cast will be rewarded with a fourth season remains to be seen but they sure are trying with Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi's family turmoil,  Reza Farahan's engagement to Adam,  and Mercedes "MJ" Javid's pregnancy rumors. Bravolebrities are so predictable. 

Tonight, Mike Shouhed calls Reza a bully, Vida upsets MJ when she admits she never intended to have children, and Lilly Ghalichi shocks with talk about sex changes in Iran. Check out the preview clips below. Reality Tea will be live-tweeting the reunion – join us! 

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It's Shahs of Sunset reunion time. Andy Cohen ditches the usual couches in favor of a huge dinner table - Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi, Lilly Ghalichi, and Mike Shouhed sit to Andy's right and Reza Farahan, Mercedes "MJ" Javid, and Asa Soltan Rahmati sit to Andy's left. Me, I have vending machine caviar & wine on my right and butt suppositories & wine on my left. Let's do this.

First observation, there is an obscene amount of food on the table, including a buttery chocolate croissant.  Of course!  A viewer wants to know – when MJ talks down to someone and they get upset, she says they need thicker skin. But, when Mike tells MJ not to eat a buttery chocolate croissant, she goes fifty shades of crazy on him. MJ admits that she exploded BUT only because Mike's advice was unsolicited. 

MJ adds, "I don't need a lesson about my body image – and I definitely do not need it from him because we're not sleeping together."  Andy tells MJ to enjoy all the buttery chocolate croissants she wants during the reunion.  MJ's three-sizes-too-small dress begs, please no!

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Season three of Shahs of Sunset is winding down. I, for one, am glad. I can only take this show in small doses.  I hit my limit somewhere between Reza Farahan's $3500 caviar foolishness and Mercedes "MJ" Javid's chocolate croissant meltdown

Last week, Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi's ongoing conflict with MJ boiled over into her relationship with her sister, Leila. Big. Time. Their exchange was ugly, sad, and unnecessary. Reza blogged similar feelings, adding, "I left that day wanting to call my sister to tell her how much she means to me, and I did." 

Sweet – but let's dissect the rest of Reza's Bravo blog before we get all warm and fuzzy. ;) 

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Torture sums up this week's Shahs of Sunset nicely. From Mercedes "MJ" Javid's tanning to Asa Soltan Rahmati's art show and from Reza Farahan's preaching to Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi's dysfunctional family – it's too much at one time. 

To start the episode, GG meets up with her sister, mortal enemy, and business partner, Leila, to talk about GG's Extensions. They're not meeting with clients, per se, but they are on Bravo. Yet Leila looks like a drowned rat and GG looks like she just came from the gym. Neither are looks I'd strive for when promoting a hair product. Anyway, Leila brings up GG's fight with MJ at Del Mar, because it's been on her mind and totally concerns her. GG points out, if Leila would stop involving herself, she wouldn't be so put out. Leila believes MJ is innocent and GG is out of control. She talked to MJ, so, of course! 

GG informs Leila that MJ phoned their mother, calling GG a slut whore bitch and vowing to never be in the same room with her for the rest of her life, on the way home from Del Mar. Leila admits this is news to her, but she adds, "Since forever your story and everybody else's story rarely is the same story." 

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Shahs of Sunset is a mess. Last night, Asa Soltan Rahmati thought it would be a really fantastic idea for Mercedes "MJ" Javid and Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi to fake be nice to each other in order to bring Reza Farahan and Mike Shouhed together again.  Fool proof, right?  They all got drunk and argued about a buttery chocolate croissant for hours.

First, Mike wakes up the morning after the Diamond Water party, and Jessica tells him it was a disaster.  Mike admits he doesn't remember much of what happened at the party, but he says his friendship with Reza is important to him.

Asa invites MJ and GG to her house for lunch. Good news, MJ wears a real shirt over her corset. Bad news, it isn't long before she's falling out of it. Worse news, MJ's as annoying as ever.  Season three MJ is such a disappointment to me. MJ brings Asa an orchid and she wears sunglasses. GG brings Asa an orchid and she wears sunglasses.  So MJ complains about GG copying her.  How could GG have known about MJ's orchid? And isn't it always sunny in CA? Anyway, lunch is awkward, but GG and MJ come to a truce. MJ admits using Leila to get to GG was crappy. GG thinks MJ's apology is lacking but accepts it.

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This week's Shahs of Sunset was insane. Bravo gets the ick – MJ's sex tapes – out of the way first thing. We pay for this later. Mercedes "MJ" Javid seeks professional help to recover the missing files from her computer. She worries the young, hot computer guy will copy her sex tapes. He finds the files – not a cold chance in hell he enjoys it, let alone copies them. 
 
Next, Mike Shouhed meets with old Vegas friends, Big Baller #1 and Big Baller #2. Their office building is nice and shiny but rather empty inside – much like their secretaries. The Ballers, who finance real estate deals, offer Mike a job as their broker.  He promises to think about it, adding, "I want to show everybody a big middle finger, to the entire world and say, 'HAHAHA, I'm the richest.'"

Asa Soltan Rahmati meets with a party planner friend to go over details for the Diamond Water launch party.  Not much to see here.  She complains about the lack of gaudy gold accessories – yet the whiners on House Hunters never stop complaining about gold this, gold that – and requests a Diamond Water bottle ice sculpture. Asa also reveals she's planning a family reunion in Turkey.

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Last night's episode of Shahs of Sunset was fairly uneventful. For me, it felt like a filler episode to set up the showdown between Reza Farahan and Mike Shouhed on the next episode. Oh but Mercedes "MJ" Javid did do some of that pesky thing us regular folks call a job! I guess that's worth noting. 

To kick things off, Reza and Adam Neely are off to the mall. Reza pokes fun at Sears and Nieman Marcus in the same mall – this coming from the man who has Louis Vuitton shoes and IKEA furnishings in the same apartment. As they walk through the mall, Reza and Adam talk about the menu for their upcoming housewarming party, and they just happen to come across a Beluga caviar vending machine – a small can of caviar costs $3500, cash only. First, gross. Second, no problem for Reza, who whips out a wad of $100s. Adam wants to know who carries around that kind of cash, Reza says immigrants! Reza gives Adam props for going with the flow, adding, "With a little more training, he could be the quintessential perfect Persian wife." 

Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi and Asa Soltan Rahmati take a Tai Chi class in the park. Asa thinks it'll be good for GG, who lacks impulse control. At the same time, GG tells us, "MJ makes me want to cut her t*ts off and bitch slap her with them."  Tai Chi just makes GG horny.  Better luck next time, Asa.

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