The formal affair featured a reception that started two hours late, after they were forced to change clothes in a parking lot. All class there. Anyway, the Real Housewives of Miami star insists that's not what really happened, claiming Bravo edited her affair to look way worse than it was. #yeahright
Plus Adriana said she was just really tired and that's what took so long. Starting with her bravo blog she's all about excuses. "All of those emotions added to the stress of planning a wedding, and I was literally crumbling down as my wedding day approached," Adriana laments. "My physical limit was pushed and I was very drained and feeling weak; just one hour before the wedding I felt like fainting and believed I wasn't going to make it, because I had no more strength to carry on physically."
Last night on Real Housewives of Miami we were witness to the slooooowest wedding ever. I mean it took over five years and then some hours to finally get that thing officially off the ground, right?!
Adriana de Moura was hours upon hours late to her own affair because she confused wedding with fashion show and was holed up in a suite getting dressed. Meanwhile downstairs the guests were sweating to death before passing out from hunger and finally giving up and leaving. Hopefully they all swung by McDonald's on their way out.
Twenty-four hours before the big day, the drama begins. Adriana is having a stress attack and is so sick she's talking about skipping the whole thing to sleep. She pretty much did skip the whole thing but that's cause she was grooming. Speaking of grooming, despite just getting an IV of vitamins she needsFrederic Marq to give her a B-12 shot in the butt for more vitamins. Is it possible to be addicted to them?
Not surprisingly, Bravo's favorite potty-mouthed Polish beauty has her take on what happened, and she's never one to hold back. Joanna remains vehemently loyal to Lea and is quick to belittle her fiance's feelings in one breath and then praise him with the next. She's exhausting, no?
Joanna Krupa and Romain finally had a breakthrough in their relationship. Adriana de Mouracontinuedto be insane by insisting her wedding guests dress pure and innocent as angels, newborn fawns, and daisies at her sham re-wedding, which is anything but fresh as the first snow.
Joanna has Lisa Hochstein over for dinner. Joanna doesn't cook or use dishes so she serves sushi and soup out of the restaurant takeout boxes. I was getting the BPA heebie-jeebies watching them drink miso out of the big plastic cartons. The food doesn't really matter since the wine is the main course.
Our favorite reality TV stars can't get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to Twitter to share even more of their daily lives with us. And we love them for it! Here's a roundup of some of our favorite pictures from the Twitterverse this week! Enjoy!
Last night on Real Housewives of Miami bridges to the past were burned as everyone focused on getting over it, moving forward, and embracing the positive. Except for Lenny Hochstein – he embraced the liposuction and actualized his dream of looking like Romain Zago of being a swimsuit model.
Things begin with Adriana de Moura and Joanna Krupa meeting for breakfast to discuss why they hate each other. Joanna stuck to non-alcoholic beverages and that ensured that no eggs were thrown in anyone's face (boring!) despite Adriana being an hour late. In the end Adriana apologizes for calling Joanna "Ho-anna" and insinuating she was an escort, although she tries to blame the whole thing on Lea Black! All is good… for now! Personally I don't know how Joanna resisted the urge to knock that goofy white hat off Adriana's head.
A Housewife will hawk just about anything! From cookbooks to hair care, these ladies are all about putting their name on a product. However, what about the stuff that they use before they put their names on something? When fans compliment these women on their hair or their skin or their donkey booty, the housewives got these from a particular product…and not one that they created themselves!
It's only after they are recognized for this attribute that some handler believes it's a good idea for said housewife to create her own line of butt-lifting underwear/press-on nails/horse shampoo/insert product here. Am I right? Let's take Lisa Hochstein from Real Housewives of Miami, shall we?
It pays to have connections! Lisa Hochstein chipped her tooth at 1 a.m. and thankfully she has friends in all the right places – Karent Sierra DDS to the rescue.
Lisa chipped the tooth at her friend Carrie's birthday celebration and her former Real Housewives of Miami co-star Karent took the emergency call, offering to meet Lisa at her office. Lisa shared Tweets and photos of the traumatic morning, "@karentsierra and I at 1 am in her office fixing my chipped tooth. I don't follow instructions well lol #acid #dentist #drkarentsierra this should be on #rhom. Came to my rescue at 1am! #loveher #goodfriend best #dentist ever".
Karent fixed her up and was glad to see Lisa's "hillbilly smile" gone. "Happy to have been able to take care of my friend @lisahochstein #dentistsaregoodfriendstohave. Looking fabulous Miss Lisa! No more hillbilly smile @lisahochstein #smile #teeth #emergencydentist #dentalspa". (How many hashtags can they cram in one Tweet?)
This is why it's important to never burn those reality TV bridges, ladies!